FruityLexia. Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 When gambling on a pokie machine, it is better not to urinate in the coin collection before collecting winnings. Cheap wine means heinous hangover. Dont pull on girls hair during sex when they have extensions in, as funny as it is. Never pay for public transports. Never wipe your ass with a long sleeve shirt on, somtimes this turns bad, roll them up. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piggy back Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 --don't get into stealing everything you need , it gets to the point you realize everything in this world is FREE... --don't shit where you sleep --don't trust a pretty face, she is still cutthroat! --wear a condom always --if you fuck on the first night, never wife that whore --save money, but know that life is short, and you can't take it with you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twinky the kid Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 smoke dust. fight cops. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Bruno Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 No matter how hot she is, No matter how smart she is, No matter how much you dig her, Somebody, somewhere is sick of her shit. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twinky the kid Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 human feces can actually be frozen after being in the toilet. not only can some of the frozen turds become extremely sharp at the end where your sphincter cuts off the poo, but it is also a double whammy for any unfortunate intruder in your house: stabbed with a turd. insta-infection. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IOU Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 Don't listen to people on message boards. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jus[T]DoMe! Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 instead of air-freshner leave a bar of soap in your car under the seat. it lasts a lot longer and keeps yo shit smellin fresh and clean instead of all "strawberry shithole" What if it gets really hot in my car... would soap bar make it smell bad from melting and shit? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FruityLexia. Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 human feces can actually be frozen after being in the toilet. not only can some of the frozen turds become extremely sharp at the end where your sphincter cuts off the poo, but it is also a double whammy for any unfortunate intruder in your house: stabbed with a turd. insta-infection. or insterted into the vagina of freaky womans Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SerialSkiller Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 Don't let your unwanted rice go down the drain, I can't tell you how many pipes I've seen clogged with rice. ooh shit... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Schnitzel Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 or insterted into the vagina of freaky womans I believe that's referred to as giving her "the Smudgie" :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SukiSukiNow Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 don't ever trust anyone and don't ever believe anything unless it came straight from the horse's mouth, or at least that's what a smart person would do Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IOU Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 don't ever trust anyone and don't ever believe anything unless it came straight from the horse's mouth, or at least that's what a smart person would do Never trust Korean women. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
odd.pr0ject Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 Never trust Korean women. especially ones who sell wigs! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swindle Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 never rat on your friends and always keep your mouth shut Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edward Orenthal Norton Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 try not to buy pure breed dogs. they typically have a mess of problems do to the manipulation of breeding. but with a mix breed/mut your vet visits will be very few in their lifetime. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mercer Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 Girls are hard to understand, As men, we have trouble figuring them out. Read between the lines. For instance, when you're fucking, if a girl says she wants you to eat her pussy, It means she wants you to lick it, put down the knife and fork before it's too late. Or say your on the first date, things are going really well and you're back at your place. If she says "I'll do anything you want want me to" don't give her all your dirty clothes and some quarters for the laundry. Save that for the second or third date at least. Trust me on this one. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spring Break '92 Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 Every couple weeks or so pour a large cooking pot of boiling water down your tub or shower drain. This helps keep it clear. If your shit is clogged and you are standing in six inches of water while you shower, you need to pour some acid down your drain. Acid will take care of just about any clog. Even a dead mouse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LEVEL 75 PALADIN Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 Use a cigarette lighter to prop open gas pumps where the little metal hinge thingy is broken off. /nofirestarter Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abcs Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 gasoline takes paint off your hands if you get paint on glass a straight razor blade will take it off always go to walmart before you hit the grocery store never go to court without a lawyer dont say shit to the police without a lawyer avoid the police all together dont trust any female that isnt your mom pay down your high interest credit cards Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abcs Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 the book is always better than the movie and if you find an author you like.... read them by the order they wrote their literature. Alot of writers' use the same characters and if you read them out of order you end up ruining surprises Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tipsycripsy420 Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 Use a semi understandable way to structure your sentences on 12oz so you don't sound like abcs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JohnLester#31 Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 Break up with your girl if she says "I want to feel you cum inside me", when shes not on the pill, or you're just simply not ready for that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirtydoses Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 life changing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
belmonts Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 get aids spread them Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JohnLester#31 Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 In order to get a job you want, you have to market yourself to that employer by showing why you are worthy for that position. As simple as that, and it worked for me. [/url] life changing. Mind blowing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JohnLester#31 Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 Don't listen to a: Read the: yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted September 14, 2009 Author Share Posted September 14, 2009 Break up with your girl if she says "I want to feel you cum inside me", when shes not on the pill, or you're just simply not ready for that. I would say to break it off with any female that is not down with having an abortion should birth control fail and to always use birth control. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chubbs Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 never read the bible. never go to church. if at all possible, try to add satan in your life. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lil_spenty Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 meth and shaven balls make you go faster. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TRILLionare Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 isnt this what advice dog is for? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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