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YOU KNOW YOUVE DONE IT, MR PEABODY STYLE


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so last night i went out, bowled in my bowling league, got completely shit faced on like 5-6 pitchers of beer, had a fucking blast until my buddy took the money back that i won, and then gambled away against him, left to go home, get home, its 1130pm or so, strip down to the boxers, attempt to watch miami ink in my drunken state, somehow wonder to my bed, lay down face first.

 

fast forward a few hours and i awake to a disturbing discovery that im wet. but from what?

 

well it turns out that i was so trashed, that i pissed in my sleep.

 

this was a first for me, and i pray to god the last time this ever happens.

 

so once i woke up enough to figure out what the fuck had happened, i got outta my boxers, took the sheets and shit off my bed, attempted to flip my big ass mattress (again people, im drunk) in the process i broke this bad ass lamp i had from ikea, glass everywhere...

 

finally flip the damn thing, get a new blanket, and proceed to catch sheep in my sleep.

 

shits a lot more funny for you guys than it was me, but still, fucking funny none the less.

 

and as always, aint no shame in my game....

 

what are your funniest drunken stories or mr / mrs peabody stories??????????

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not me ..but i caused it for a friend..

 

i lived in a college town for awhile .. one of my freinds thought he was tough shit and was tellin me he could drink back at home ... so i made shure that i got him fucked up when he came to see me.. we started off with quarts of OE at my house then moved to my backyard where there was a keg party across the yard. after that keg we made it back to my house for the liquor i had bought.. by this time the shit talker is so wasted he can barely speak.. im just getting warmed up... and my other freind is so drunk he is trying to fight anything that he can see. so im like .. alright time to go to the REAL party .. both of them are like WTF we just had a party!..(fuckin wieners thought that a keg and like 10 people in a backyard was a party) so i took them to this sick party with a shitload of kegs .full bar..tons of girls..dj..everything..i dont even know how i drove home... next mourning i wake up and my freind is in my living room in a sofa chair passed out

 

hes sitting in a puddle of his own piss.. curled up in it

 

so i let him be ... he wakes up all shocked and shit . trying to play it off..

hes comin at me the whole day

"dude i swear i just sweat a lot when i drink"..

 

he still denies pissing himself .. its funny as fuck

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yea i pissed myself more than once, lol. i used to be a huge drunk.

 

one time i got reallll shitty, passed out... and then woke up like this: (yes this is me)

 

lmfaodeadsexy20.jpg

 

turns out my girl and her friend had put me in teh women clothing

then they jokingly said something related to sex, i forgot exactly what it was,

but i took it 100% serious and whipped my dick out and was tryin to get my girl and her friend for a 3some

 

it didnt work.

 

turned out to be mad drama the next day too...

 

:lol:

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another time i was drinkin some fucken goldshlager (sp?) out on the front porch of my buddys apartment...

i will never drink that shit ever again btw...

 

and anyways we ended up just sittin outside for however long just gettin trashed and bullshitting...

 

 

next thing i know, i wake up in my underwear on his couch, i was like WTF...

 

apparently i passed out/blacked out on the porch and they couldnt wake me up so they dragged my ass inside, slamming my head into all kinds of shit in the process and dumped water on me and none of it woke me up, so they threw me in the tub wear i then pissed myself and then sprayed me with water again and dragged me to the couch

 

LOL.... i got some bad blackouts man...

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I think every guy I've ever met from Philly wets their bed when drinking... i guess it is a regional thing.

 

 

I did it once a few years ago... in my GF's bed. I was not drunk, it was from the strongest herb I've ever smoked. I guess it was so strong that my whole body loosened up and went numb.

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my boy used to pee on his GF when they tried to fuck and he was all trashed. and this dude is small but gets so smashed he pisses a few times a year.

 

i haven't pissed myself yet, but i am pretty sure it will happen i still have many years of drinking.

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I went to a campground in northern CT once and got blast off of 40s of St Ides. There was some kind of ice cream eating contest there and I enetered it because I was broke and hungry. I WON THAT MOTHERFUCKER and got a t shirt. A few hours later, i ended up throwing up soldied ice cream and then passed out outside next to the tents. I guess at some point I pulled out my dick when I was laying there and pissed straight up like a fountain. So the next day I had to borrow some shorts and I wore my new tshirt on the ride home.

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I never peed myself, but I once woke up to the sound of ugly dude pissing on the floor of my room.

Him being a friend of my friend who's a really nice girl, I only dragged him outside and left him there.

All this I heard from said female friend who was sleeping in my bed next to me when this happened.

Last time I saw her she told me I also threw dudes wallet out the window as I found it on the floor

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I pee peed in an ex's friend's dishwasher once.

When everyone was passed out.

To prove a point.

 

The point was that I am a horrible house guest.

And hip hop don't stop.

 

I peed the bed not too long ago, for the first time in years.

Well, for the first time in my own bed.

It was because I ate some xanax and then drank Sparks and some 32s of High Life.

My dude was super mad the next day and yelled at me.

He is still a novice drinker.

I am sure he will eventually pee the bed.

 

For some reason, I usually only pee the bed when I am not at my own house.

When I am on vacations.

Visiting friends.

Maybe it's because I drink more.

Maybe because I am a horrible person who doesn't respect people's property.

Either way, I am trying to work away from that type of thing.

 

I peed in some fashionista girl's purse once.

She left it just sitting there.

And my line of thinking was that anyone who leaves a purse just sitting around at a house party, doesn't value their possessions.

So I filled it with pee pee.

 

She was stupid anyways.

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