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Dear ________,


suca

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Dear cop that pulled me over tonight,

 

i usually wouldn't think twice about screaming expletives about your

shitty pig life in my car after you are gone and i am driving away,

but....well. you did a good thing letting a nigga go tonight, my life is

already on the brink of failure as it is and basically, what i;m saying here

is....thanx bruh. you don't all suck.

 

-NOES

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Dear Weed,

I miss you. You helped with a lot of things, not even on some stoner shit. Took my mind of shit, helped with anxiety and if this was California I would legally have you. Instead I have court for you and haven't seen you in forever. Soon though. Soon.

Sincerely,

Soon to be reunited stoner RR

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Dear coworker in new department I'm training in,

Please refrain from saying whoop whoop or other assorted juggalo faggotry. I get it. You like them. You love the family, you have bad scratcher juggalo tattoos, and big ass stickers on your car. Just stop or else I will be forced to throw you into the x ray machine and turn it all the way up. thank you.

 

almighty annoyed

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dear cunt who lives across the landing from where i have been working this week. your snide comment about the mess another tradesman left towards me and my father was rather aggressive. had i not been half asleep, and had you not been standing infront of your pot ugly wife. i probably would have given you a swift poke in the face.

 

however your snobby comment about how your building "isn't like a tenement like down the road" had me fuckin' raging all day.

 

you are a sad little fuck who is full of your own self importance. you need to take a look at your beetroot like complexion in the mirror and get a fuckin' grip. what you do not know is i live within' walking distance of your house. infact nearly on the same street. once you have began to forget we had ever even worked in your shitty retirement building. i will most certainly be right in aboot your car. i still haven't decided weather to slash all four of your tyres, or pour brake fluid all over your bonnet to strip the paint.

 

however i think i will end up picking the one i think will cost you the most money on your insurance.

 

 

 

dear realism. they probably do worse... they are quite a primitave people. they have been known to shit in plastic bags and throw them out the windows on to the street or garden, even though they have toilets in their homes. they are usually far too simple minded to understand how they work.

 

this clearly also applies for the use of any other water dispensing device.

 

people from glasgow enjoy nothing more than to fight. actually i remember reading something like glasgow has more gangs per square meter than LA or something to that effect.

 

the more you know...

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Dear BBShoes,

Is that a compliment? I've never seen that show.

Let me help you with that..Not wierd, just a wee bit off.

I do something that takes less work cuz im lazy like that..nails..woohoo.

Add a few Lbs, over a foot of hair, make it black, add a few tattoos

and there you have me. I dont know what her personality is like, but I have a stank ass perosnality and have been called more names than my birthmother gave me.

maybe i'll send u more of a visual aide.

 

have a good night

XXL

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Dear whoever may care,

So apparently if I were to Fuck up at my new position and a plane crashed, I could go to jail...awesome.

 

Also, multiple Gordon IPA's plus jameson is good.

 

And, I'm fairly drunk so I will stop typing... but the extremely drunk rednecks here at the bar need to shut the Fuck up and leave... but the blonde big tittied chick can kick it

 

No one really cares...but I'm going to rant anyways...

Almightyme

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