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Rolf Harris

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Everything posted by Rolf Harris

  1. Absolutely fuck all... sitting at my workbench drinking cans of juice and avoiding doing what the government pays me for... (not a cop)
  2. Rolf Harris

    Alcoholism

    Fuckin' hell Breakfast.... thought I'd stick my head in the door here... Glad everyone seems to be doing ok... I've not been great this year, but not as bad as i used to be, everything seems to go back to my bad ways round about christmas time and i get in the habits of daily drinking again and it takes months for me to get out the loop.... catching up with people I haven't seen all year and the place everyone goes is the pub... my luck has been shite this year and the previous wasn't much better... but things are slowly starting to look up, moving into a new hoose soon, and starting a new job next week too... plus i'm trying to get into creative projects which should keep me busy enough to keep oot the boozer and hopefully make me a bit of extra cash which would be nice...
  3. 12oz I need your help, i remember before the crash that i think it might have been Morton posted pictures of a massive photo of an old VW, that he used a certain programme to spread and print the image over a load of A4 pages then pasted them all together... I'm a fuckin' retard with computers but i need to brush up on all this shit, anyone know the name of what it was he used or anything similar? any help or a point in the right direction would be greatly appreciated bros...
  4. there's a boy with a bad mike tyson lisp who works at the counter in a shop just doon the road from me... recently I have found myself adding up the items I'm buying until the total comes to exactly £3.34... then I hand the boy a tenner note and he'll say; "Thereth your thix thixty thix change!" then I leave laughing to myself uncomfortably...
  5. Dear new joab... you're pretty cool... so far anyway... I'll just continue taking my time and making things look affy bonny... dear deaf people... I promise I'll learn sign language to at least say hello to you in the mornings... dear blind man... I probably wouldn't be brave enough to give you a nail gun considering you can't see a fuckin' thing... but you make a fuckin' bra joab... Dear girl... You are lovely, bonny as fuck too... however I get the impression that we are both very different people... for example I am an arsehole and you are not... I dunno what to do really... I want to take you oot, but just can either see this ending in tears or we'll have a volvo and a labrador in a few years time... Big Rolf
  6. Dear Oontz... Where aboot is everyone? I'm glad I can see pictures again noo though... Dear pa... get some o' they invoices in so I hae healthy drinkin' money fir the weekend ken? Dear Lassie fae Miami... I thoroughly enjoyed you dancing your arse against my peenus all night.... but you fucked my miss piggys up something terrible... Rolf
  7. Dear Rolf... you're going a wee bit mental now you're a single man again... learning a lot of shit about certain people you should have been wise to a lot of years ago... why are you even entertaining those wee fuckin' sluts you know fine well have seen more bell ends than fuckin' weekends... get them right to fuck... yir pal Rolf...
  8. Rolf Harris

    Alcoholism

    That's what I was thinking Deine Mudder.... I was thinking about quitting completely, because I know it would do me a lot of good, but I'm around alcohol pretty much all of the weekend, and some school nights too... I was wondering how things would be with such a big void in my life being gone, and what would I replace it with? something constructive hopefully... My mate has been off it over 14 months, and wasn't a problematic drinker by any means... he still comes oot for nights and just has saft drinks... so it can be done I suppose... saying that I'll probably go for a few pints tonight to get oot the hoose... but I have very limited funds so won't be going daft...
  9. Rolf Harris

    Alcoholism

    I'm back after a while away... been through a bit of shit recently... moved city recently with my then girlfriend for six months, wasn't happy with the new city or how things were going with the ex so bailed and had to move back with my parents for a while... fuckin' fun and games... My drinking has been going through fazes of doing pretty well and then not, like having beers in the fridge and not touching them for over a week, which was unheard of before... over the Christmas period I was on the batter quite a lot... that seems to be what makes me take a step back and fall into old habits where I'm drinking more than I should be most nights... but I'd missed a lot of friends, and a few were having leaving parties. so spending time with them for the last time in god knows how long was pretty important to me... I have made some progress though, I'm certain that I'm not drinking as much when I'm oot at pubs or nightclubs, smoking weed too which doesn't make me want to drink as much either... I've also knocked buying carry outs and drinking in the hoose right on the head... if I'm not going to the pub with friends then I'm not drinking. I'm still well aware that I need to cut down, but I'm doing a lot better than what I was three or four years ago... I hope everyone else has been doin' well though...
  10. Dear OOntz... Hullo!!! I've been away but I'm back noo.... Rolf
  11. yir fitba' team' pish... 0-0 c'mon son...
  12. Dear job... fuck you I'm fuckin' oot o here... Dear manager... Sorry i had to square up to you, but if anyone ever spoke to me like that in the boozer, i'd have battered them all over the fuckin' shop... Dear Self-employment... Please work oot ahright Rolf
  13. dear 12oonts... my people... yet again... Rolf
  14. I'mma send that bitch a snapchat.... bitches love snapchats...
  15. Rolf Harris

    Alcoholism

    been doing not bad... but i've noticed the drinking creeping up through the week again. not to previous levels, but i seem to be missing the part where i have a few booze free days through the week... still haven't been back to the doctors to get my follow up blood test, i just haven't had the time for whatever reasons... i was at the doctors today because i'm fuckin' riddled with the bastardin' flu... and nothing was mentioned. i'll make the appointment once i'm feeling better though. plus i won't be drinking at all for whatever length of time that i have this whooooorin' strain of aids i hope everyone else is ok...
  16. Rolf Harris

    Gaming

    i'm enjoying all the small scottish references through the game...
  17. Rolf Harris

    Gaming

    in and oot my fuckin' arse... massive cue for midnight release, but only had to wait 15 minutes which wasn't too bad... got it installing the noo...
  18. I always see old fat men in boozers pissin' like this... i think it's the only way they manage to pish because they make mad struggling noises everytime... i always gift wrap my jobbies tae, stops that bitch moaning like fuck...
  19. dear symbols... aiight... i'll keep loosing money that i don't have in the first place... i just wondered because my girlfriend went mental at me because i was shoutin' like fuck at the telly for the wee boy to use his stick to batter the horse. but they're nowhere near as brutal as they used to be. Dear upstair and doonstairs neighbours... If yir gonna hae a perty, then by all means hae a fuckin' perty! but dinna be haein' a perty on a fuckin' school night iye? fir fucks sake... I really dinna want to hear techno any time o' day, least of all at 2 in the fuckin' moarnin'! squad o belters... dear live boxing stream... please work... please... am i fuck paying $75 for this fight that'll probably be pish anywiy... i'm more concerned aboot the under-cairds cheery! Rolf
  20. Rolf Harris

    Gaming

    i'll be going for the midnight release, only because i can walk in and oot with the game in hand within a matter of minutes... if there's a long wait then i'll fuck right off... i've reserved it at a supermarket that's oot o' the toon centre... and i'm off work, if iwasn't off work then i'd just wait until the following weekend.
  21. my married friends tell me that a short while after you get married your wife's vagina seals shut and you only ever get your hole once in a blue moon... can you please tell me if that's true or not so i know never to do it? thanks...
  22. Rolf Harris

    Gaming

    haven't played my xbox in months, but I've taken a week off work for GTA5...
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