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shameful/awesome sex story souperthread.


DSD666

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Funny weird one

Was at a hell chill laid back stoner party, early high school years. Anyway people were passing out and everyone crashed on the dudes living room floor. Some fucked up kid who at the time was my mate, proceeded to pull this girls skirt and panties off, slip a big toe in her cunt, and foot fuck her - While she was passed out, foot rape homie. Cunt was grinning and all about what he did, he got fucked up by her boyfriend tho, all good.

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Turns out the person that called us in was my roommate mikey who really just wanted to fuck ME and was pissed off that I was getting it on with someone other than him (nohomo).

 

What the fuck?

 

 

:lol:

 

I didn't know that he had a hardon for me until a month or two later. After the cops left we tried to go back in but the door was locked. All my shit from my room except for my bed, and her purse were out on the front step. The fucking queer asshole had wouldn't answer after a half hour of knocking so we went up to my parents house and fucked. The way I found out he wanted to fuck me was after I had been working that call center job for about 6 mos. (He quit after that night.) Now a lil history between me :nohomo: and "mikey" :homo: When I was younger I got hooked on meth and spent around a year and a half in rehab (8 years completely clean almost to the day and I'll die before I touch that shit again) which is where I met him. We shared the same room almost that entire time so obviously we were friends. When we both graduated I had no friends and niether did he so we just rented the upper floor of this house next to one of my pops rentals. So fast forward to where I find out. I'm living in a new apartment I got with the chick (she's moved out though... and I'll tell THAT story in a lil bit) and I'm hanging out with some of my friends from work. I get a call from a number I thought was a chick I had been tryin to get with. Turns out it was mikey, who had fallen off the bus and was spracked out to hell. He quickly told me he missed me, and had always wanted to tell me he loved me, and that I should feel the same way since we spent so much time together and that he used to smell my towels (wtf?) and knew we were perfect for each other. He proceeded to tell me he wanted to see me and where could we meet. He was talking so fast I couldn't get a word in edgewise so I finally tell him to fuck off and I was calling the police and if he called me again I'd give him a shotgun facelift. So he calls me 6 more times while I'm on the phone with 911. The calls stop about 30 mins later, then I get a call from a diff number that turned out was one of the officers reporting to that call. I guess he called me while standing on the back patio of his dealers house and they traced his shit and busted a ton of people and a whole lot of people went to jail. I haven't heard from him since.

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You called the cops huh? And it led to multiple arrests?

 

That wall of text is an ocean, that little fact is a drop of blood, and the users on this forum are the sharks. You're the seal or wounded dolphin or whatever, you pick, I can only take these analogies so far.

 

Good luck!

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You called the cops huh? And it led to multiple arrests?

 

That wall of text is an ocean, that little fact is a drop of blood, and the users on this forum are the sharks. You're the seal or wounded dolphin or whatever, you pick, I can only take these analogies so far.

 

Good luck!

 

That's what I was told when I was called back about it. I can't confirm anything other than what I was told. I prefer the seal though...... they're a little cuter than dolphins IMO

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lets break up the homo snitching, shit is completely uncalled for. saturday night I was suppose to be the designated driver as usual, went the the Tigers game with a few homies, hit a chill ass day spot, went to a house party for a bit, and drove us to our local bar. mind you we been going here for 5 or so years, know everyone, but on the weekend there is always hoes that we aint seen yet so its a pretty good bar. anyway, I took a half a football on the way to the bar, and when we got there my boy had a beer leftover from the drive. so I slammed it. mind yall like I have said before, I drink maybe 4-5 times a year. so I get smashed quickly.

 

after at least 9 shots of tequilla that we could trace through bills and people that said they bought them for me, 6 shots of crown, and a few beers, I was blacked out drunk. apperently I am a mean ass drunk also, and this is how I woke up easter morning...

 

stark ass naked, in my homies parents bsaement, with a huge cut going down the side of my face, from above my eye down, and a pair of my ex girlfriends panties next to my head. my homies pops came downstairs, looked at me, laughed, and dipped. I get up, turn on the lights, there is said panties, which are still in my backpack, the cut, and I woke up with a pocket full of xanax bars. I didnt have a dollar to my name, not sure how I got them. come to find out I smashed out my ex at 5 am. I need to drink more often...

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Why is that so unbelievable? I am an alchoholic, and when i quit drinking i was at a case + a fifth a day. I have relapsed several times and i can still drink that much easy. Take me to a bar motherfucker, and JUST WATCH. 17 shots is easy, i would black out, yeah.. But whatever. Good luck being a pussy. The dudes from detroit.

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it's funny how niggas on the internet love to talk shit. 17 drinks really AINT shit. last month I lost a ridiculous bet and had to wear a dress no homo to the bar, and just to get the nerve up to do it my homie and I split a 5th before we even stepped foot in the bar and I still did shots all night. not to mention the fact you missed I was on xanax, and anyone that has drank on that shit knows you have no fucking idea what you are doing, other than being awesome, and possibly superman. I dont drink because like crack rock steady said, when I was bartending 5 plus years I nearly dided multiple times from drinking related incidents, so I cut the shit out my life. I suggest you stop being such a hipster fucking pussy drinking imported draft beer and wearing pants that cut of the circulation to your dick no homo and man the fuck up when you go to the bar. even when I wore a dress I still got blacked out faded and ripped the shit off at some point and tried to fight niggas. nigga I aint 18, I can handle 20 plus drinks in a night. I just dont remember doing it, and wake up with scars and bruises cause I like getting hit in the face. pussy.

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My homie John (rip) was smashing this girl in this dudes pool at the party once late at night, my homie gets done, goes to hop out the pool, and realizes the condom aint on his dick, this dude swims around the pool looking for this condom cuz he dont want it to get sucked into the engine or whatever and fuck up our homies pool, my nigga cant find the condom for shit, so he gives up. the next morning my dude told me when he woke up next to his bitch, he started kissing her neck, feeling on her clit wanting to fuck again, he goes to slide his finger in her, feels something, and pulls out the condom. bitch slept with that jimmy hat inside her all night long. how gorss, how much of a loose ass whore can you be that you cant feel a rubber up inside you.

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I think i told the story before of my female friend in college who had a similar story.

She was getting banged out by her normal FWB and he lost the condom and didn't think

nothing of it. Later that night she was getting finger blasted by some dude at a frat party

and he pulled the other dudes condom out. :haha:

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Why is that so unbelievable? I am an alchoholic, and when i quit drinking i was at a case + a fifth a day. I have relapsed several times and i can still drink that much easy. Take me to a bar motherfucker, and JUST WATCH. 17 shots is easy, i would black out, yeah.. But whatever. Good luck being a pussy. The dudes from detroit.

 

Because he just got done saying that he only drinks 4-5 times a year and that he was on xanax even before he started drinking.

People who only drink 4-5 times a year get drunk off a six pack.

 

I too have a hard time picturing somebody who only drinks 4-5 times a year surviving 17 shots of liquor + xanies.

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