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Dear ________,


suca

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Re: Dear ________, - no homo

 

Dear bed,

you are glorious. i am going to spend upwards of 12 hours sleeping in you soon. thank you for being comfortable and warm.

Sincerely,

MrChupalazymotherfucker

 

 

Dear girl who is hanging out with her ex this weekend,

I guarentee i can show you a better time than that chach. call me when hes gone and i'll show you how a real man does. again.

Sincerely,

The guy you were all over the other night.

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Re: Dear ________, - no homo

 

Dear Bank,

 

Fuck you I am taking my money out. Why did you keep letting me take money out for gas this week when I didnt have any!? WTF!? I deposited my whole check after paying my payment for my truck just to find I am still -$4.15 because of all of your $30 overdraft fees!? WTF! I am closing my account and going back to my credit union. At least there when I have no money they say Insufficient Funds instead of charging me $30 fucking stupid...god I am so pissed right now...

 

-fuck you you fucking whores

 

Psalm Sucks With Money Juan...

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Re: Dear ________, - no homo

 

Dear 12oz,

Ever had to take a dump so bad that motor skills seem impaired? I just spent 15 ackward minutes in the womans restroom which I accidently rushed into taking a shit so large I could have put a sombrero on top and named it "El Grande."

 

Might I add I had a woman walk in and use the stall next to me while I was in there.

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Re: Dear ________, - no homo

 

dear online application,

 

You are the most time consuming thing ever...how hard can it be to work for your company that you have to make your application longer than the odyssey. I have no idea why "when you look back you feel sorry for things you have done" is significant to figuring out my work ethic. I mean seriously if your going to ask me questions ask me something that actually questions my intelligence and not how good of a liar I can be by picking the answer I know you want to read.

Half steppin' my way into your established working institution: B.Fish

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Re: Dear ________, - no homo

 

dear girl who keeps calling me over to her house for sex,

 

im mad at you..thats why ive been ignoring your calls...

your pussy is wack...and i dont enjoy hitting it anymore...

ive got some new pussy im fucking with..

so go find someone else to fuck..

AND STOP CALLING ME BITCH!

 

ready to stab you in the forehead,

caligulaonerz

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Re: Dear ________, - no homo

 

Dear Bfish,

 

Yea women i've been meeting need to see a shrink. That is their personal problem I am just like making the move and they are like "NO ITS NOT RIGHT I JUST BROKE UP WITH MY EX 2 YEARS AGO GAAAAHHHH." Weird I gotta start picking up chicks in bars again or something...

 

-juan

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Re: Dear ________, - no homo

 

dear cali-g,

 

I cried becuase it was my first time and I really wasnt expecting it to happen...I even remember saying something like wait no hold up maybe tommorrow but I guess he was too determined to stop so it happened. So I guess I cried cuz I held out for so long for the first time and my ass hole boyfriend didnt even try and make it significant ...but it happens.

One day though I am sure I will have tears of joys from sex...one day-B.fish

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