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OptimusPrime

**the what's on your answering machine superthread**

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answering machine- "i cant answer the phone right now, my tounge is inlodged in your mothers asshole"

 

voicemail- "taking a piss, your mom will be able to call you back after she swallows"

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Old message: Hey asshole leave a message this time. I dont have caller id.

 

Prospective jobs that were calling weren't impressed at being called assholes so i changed it to something a lot less clever.

 

new message: Hello nobody is available to take your call. Please leave a message and i wil return your call as soon as possible.

 

I dont call myself that much so that may not be it word for word

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"Beeeeeelieve it or not, George isn't at home, please leave aaaaa messaaage at the beep.....I must be out, or else I'd pick up, wheeere could I beee?"

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home: hey.....leave your message after the BEAT! (me on drums) BADDA BUDDUH BADDAHDDAHDDAH BUDDUH BOODDUH CRASH!.....beep.

 

 

 

 

used to be....: allo....come touch my monkey.....after the beep.

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old voicemail message: "livin' wit' my moms" by Thirston Howl III

 

new voicemail message: a mixture of "Clouds by Cibo Matto and a snippet from the last episode of "FLCL"

 

...I get really bored at times.

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old message: hello?...oh hey what's up...not bad...leave a message after the beep.

 

new message: please leave a message after the tone BZZZZ(in a robotic voice)

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my cell phone vicemail has bjork singing "all is full of love" live. i called my cell phone while i was at her concert and recorded her as my message. yay

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Guest sneak
Originally posted by se_FOUR

"This is the T-Mobile voice mssg service, please leave a mssg after the bleep" bleeeeeep

 

haha, im on that shockingly poor network too

 

voice mail: there is a reason why i didnt pick up. take the hint."

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Guest TEARZ

i need a new voicemail message. my shit's tired. time fo some akshun!

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Originally posted by SukiSukiNow

my cell phone vicemail has bjork singing "all is full of love" live. i called my cell phone while i was at her concert and recorded her as my message. yay

that's dope

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Guest keep

hello............who is this?............oh, hey whats up........TO LEAVE A VOICE.....

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