DA KID MERO Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 :lol: MEROPOLIS. you are slacking on our business lunch. i will fight you. YO I KNOW YOU UP ON MY TWITTER, I HAD THE MOST WILD BRAZY FLU FOR LIKE A WEEK I SWORE I HAD SWINE FLU...I WENT TO THE DR. AND HE WAS LIKE "NO MY FREND VOO DOONOT HAVE SINE FDOO, TDY TO DDINK VATER AND JUICE BUT ZIP DONT GALP" I WAS LIKE "GOOD LOOKS HARPEET MOHINDAR NURESH" I JUST GOT OVER THAT SHIT AND ALL I DID WAS LET MADDD WORK PILE UP. IM SAYIN YOU KNOW I GOT YOU!! IM FINNA BE OUTTA WORK FOR THE SUMMER OWWWWW Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abstract Rationality Posted June 1, 2009 Author Share Posted June 1, 2009 WHEN IM ON A DANCEFLOOR DANCIN WITH 2 CHICKS AND SOME NIGGA COMES UP AND SAYS SOME CORNY SHIT LIKE "HEY MAN SHARING IS CARING!" - I also hate when I'm talking to two girls at the club, knowing for sure I'm scooping one of them - then some busted ugly boo boo head mutha fucka comes up and interrupts like "yo my man, can I talk to her? You with both of them?" - A PIECE OF EGG SHELL IN MY EGGS THAT I JUST TAKE OUT FAST ENOUGH BEFORE THE EGG COOKS. - DRESS PANTS THAT MAKE YOU PICK WHAT SIDE YOUR DICK AND BALLS ARE GOING, LEFT/RIGHT?? (YOU LITTLE BOYS ON THIS SITE WOULDN'T KNOW ABOUT THIS) - WHEN I'M TALKING TO A FINE ASS BITCH AND HER FAT FRIEND PULLS HER AWAY BY THE ARM CUS' SHE AIN'T GETTING ANY DICK. COCK-BLOCKING BUST-DIESELS NEED A JOB. - RUNNING OUT OF WINDSHIELD WIPER WHILE ON THE HIGHWAY FOR LONG PERIODS OF TIME. - WAITING FOR SPORTSCENTER TO GO BACK TO BASEBALL CLIPS, CUS THEY TALK ABOUT FUCKING FOOTBALL 700 DAYS A YEAR. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zebradrips Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 YO I KNOW YOU UP ON MY TWITTER, I HAD THE MOST WILD BRAZY FLU FOR LIKE A WEEK I SWORE I HAD SWINE FLU...I WENT TO THE DR. AND HE WAS LIKE "NO MY FREND VOO DOONOT HAVE SINE FDOO, TDY TO DDINK VATER AND JUICE BUT ZIP DONT GALP" I WAS LIKE "GOOD LOOKS HARPEET MOHINDAR NURESH" I JUST GOT OVER THAT SHIT AND ALL I DID WAS LET MADDD WORK PILE UP. IM SAYIN YOU KNOW I GOT YOU!! IM FINNA BE OUTTA WORK FOR THE SUMMER OWWWWW i have been slacking on my twitter game lately. if you had swine flu and beat it, that would have earned you like twenty thousand cool points, of which you are in no short supply already. the tommy wiseau interview was amazing, my girl talked to him for an hour and a half and i got the whole thing on mp3, i'll link you when it gets uploaded. i hate it when people on 12oz wanna act all buddy buddy and derail threads with their bullshit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA KID MERO Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 - I also hate when I'm talking to two girls at the club, knowing for sure I'm scooping one of them - then some busted ugly boo boo head mutha fucka comes up and interrupts like "yo my man, can I talk to her? You with both of them?" - A PIECE OF EGG SHELL IN MY EGGS THAT I JUST TAKE OUT FAST ENOUGH BEFORE THE EGG COOKS. - DRESS PANTS THAT MAKE YOU PICK WHAT SIDE YOUR DICK AND BALLS ARE GOING, LEFT/RIGHT?? (YOU LITTLE BOYS ON THIS SITE WOULDN'T KNOW ABOUT THIS) - WHEN I'M TALKING TO A FINE ASS BITCH AND HER FAT FRIEND PULLS HER AWAY BY THE ARM CUS' SHE AIN'T GETTING ANY DICK. COCK-BLOCKING BUST-DIESELS NEED A JOB. - RUNNING OUT OF WINDSHIELD WIPER WHILE ON THE HIGHWAY FOR LONG PERIODS OF TIME. - WAITING FOR SPORTSCENTER TO GO BACK TO BASEBALL CLIPS, CUS THEY TALK ABOUT FUCKING FOOTBALL 700 DAYS A YEAR. FOR REEEEAL MY NIGGA GODDAMN!! FOOTBALL SEASON LASTS 12 DAYS AND NIGGAS BE TALKIN ABOUT THAT SHIT ALL FUCKIN YEAR LIKE I GIVE A FUCK!! BASEBALL TONIGHT NEEDS TO BE ON RIGHT AFTER EVERY SPORTSCENTER. AND YOU JUST NEED TO GIVE ONE OF YOUR HOMEBOYS MAD XANAX AND THROW THAT NIGGA AT THE FAT BITCH LIKE ONE OF THEM BIG NETS NIGGAS USE TO TRAP LIONS & SHIT. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA KID MERO Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 i have been slacking on my twitter game lately. if you had swine flu and beat it, that would have earned you like twenty thousand cool points, of which you are in no short supply already. the tommy wiseau interview was amazing, my girl talked to him for an hour and a half and i got the whole thing on mp3, i'll link you when it gets uploaded. i hate it when people on 12oz wanna act all buddy buddy and derail threads with their bullshit. LMFAOOOOO SEND ME THAT LINK STAT! THE DVD IS STILL IN MY HOMEBOYS NETFLIX "SAVED" QUEUEEUEUUEEUUEUUE Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShortFuse Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 -when at the movies and youre forced up against some huge fat dude because picky people dont want site in the open front 3 rows. - having that happen to you ^^^ when you took valuable time out of your day to get there 2 hours earlier for the movies opening. -When eating a burger and your teeth dont quite bite through the pickle and when you pull away with your bite it drags out with a big glob of mustard and ketchup which then falls on your new shirt. Fuck Pickles. -When they name the biggest and baddest Hurricane to Florida Wilma.... -When I have to server a couple and the guys a douche bag, the girls hot, and you know its only because he pulls out his black AMEX. -When you find something new and fresh, whatever it might be, and try to introduce it to people...they shrug then 2 months later its the new hotness to them and all of a sudden they treat you like you jumped on the band wagon. -When the car doesnt start. -When your keys break off into locks -When you go to Duncan Donuts regularly and order the same thing EVERYTIME and your total always seems to vary. -When you find out shes Jail Bait. -When your whole table of guests order the special and while your putting in your order you hear...86 SPECIAL!! :fuck!: -When the prissy bitch orders her drink she gives you a recipe to give your bartender. -When you go to remove that little paint flake and end up peeling off half the wall. -When youre clothes shopping and something catches your eye, slightly interested, then you realize youve been looking for your size in the womans department. -When you look out the window and see a car get hit in the parking lot, chuckle, then realize its yours. -When you take a piss in the worst restroom possible and look down and your shoe lace is untied. - When you love to drink and then think about how much alcohol has lead to nothing good in your life. - When you spend 5 hours in Adobe Illustrator without saving and your computer crashes. - When your room mate fucks up your saved games. - When you save your game and dont play it for a couple of weeks then come back not knowing what you need to do and spend hours walking around aimlessly. - When Pron leads to viruses on your computer - When you get a bunch of music from someone and the tags are fucked up. - When you know what you want, at that specific store, drive just in time before an event only to walk in and find out its discontinued. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abstract Rationality Posted June 1, 2009 Author Share Posted June 1, 2009 LOL. I'M GONNA START CARRYING CHEESE BURGERS AND COOKIES IN MY POCKET. AS SOON AS I SEE THAT FAT HATER WITH 8 LBS OF CAKEUP IN HER FACE READY TO BLOCK ME, I'M THROWING HER A TREAT. AND YOU FEEL ME ON THIS BASEBALL SITUATION. WHY THE FUCK AM I HEARING ABOUT THE NFL DRAFT IN JUNE!?!? WHO FUCKING CARES ABOUT ALL THESE NFL PLAYER'S LEGAL PROBLEMS IN THE OFF SEASON, WE ALL KNOW THEY'RE ALL THUG NIGGAS THAT DON'T PAY CHILD SUPPORT. I REMEMBER LAST YEAR THERE WERE 6 BASEBALL PLAYOFF'S GOING ON AT THE SAME TIME, AND THEY WERE PLAYING "WORLD SERIES OF PPPPOOOOKKKKKKERRRRR" ON ESPN. POOOOOOOOKER. POOOOOOKER. POKER. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zebradrips Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 LOL. I'M GONNA START CARRYING CHEESE BURGERS AND COOKIES IN MY POCKET. AS SOON AS I SEE THAT FAT HATER WITH 8 LBS OF CAKEUP IN HER FACE READY TO BLOCK ME, I'M THROWING HER A TREAT. cookies and applejuice work equally well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jib25 Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 This thread looks like fun. Disabled drivers - get off the fuckin' road if you need three spaces to park a fuckin' car or drive at 20mph... People driving while on the phone - get off the fuckin' phone cunts... Reluctantly being in an airport crapper and people just having all out fuckin' blowouts! Also people who answer their phones in airport crappers... Lil yappy fuckin' dogs. They do nothin' BUT yap all fuckin' day... fuck them... People asking SERIOUSLY dumb questions, then getting in their car and sharing the road with everyone else... nice... People that go to church. What if every one of those fuckin' cars in every church parking lot was out helping their community hands-on instead of sitting inside some mega church listening to someone spoon feeding horseshit... Kids ask you questions while painting... Getting a really small cut in a weird place that for some reason hurts way more than a massive cut. You wind up complaining about something so small and look like a bitch... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abstract Rationality Posted June 1, 2009 Author Share Posted June 1, 2009 cookies and applejuice work equally well. Too bad they don't really have apple juice at all the bars though. Maybe hot pockets will also do? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zebradrips Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 no you gotta bring the little juiceboxes with you. makes a satisfying crunching sound when it hits a bad weave. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Power Bill Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 When you are standing on a packed train ... it pulls into the station and one or more dime pieces are on the platform.... the train slows down and.. Just misses 'em she gets on the next car and instead some dude with a skin disease and mental problems smellin like dick cheese with dandruff etc etc gets on instead. ffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KD1 Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 When people manage to smell terrible 1st thing in the morning, I mean wtf dont u wash before u head out to work Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zoes Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 shitting after showering Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuda Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 - Friends you don't want to hang out with keep calling you. - Friends who you want to hang out with never call you. - Boring days - Girlfriend farts and laughs, but when you do, she yells at you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zebradrips Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 i hate it when people text me a six part question. just fucking call me if it's that complicated. i hate it when people front like they're coming out and make me text them constant updates of where we're at and then don't end up coming out anyways. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
screaming hand logo Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 i hate when the 12 subscribes me to threads ive never even opened Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ms.seyer Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 when people flake out last minute for stupid reasons. when you type up something long or good, but then hit the backspace button and it ends up either deleting your whole post or it brings you back to the previous page. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
screaming hand logo Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 i typed a two page paper then pressed control z to undo and for some reason i thought control z goes in a circle, so i ctrl+z'd to much so i kept going and the page was blank and i realized it doesn't go in a circle Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ms.seyer Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 i hate when that shit happens! -when my laptop touchpad cursor jumps somewhere else when im trying to click something. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canamontana Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 i hate it when its cloudy out so you smoke a few bowls then eat hella food thinkin ur stayin in then it gets sunny and your friends wana hang out n you feel all fat and high.. when you need to go out n get more beer when you have none left. when you shit n some water splashes up your ass paying for gas all the time having something you have to wake up early for when the dentist trys to talk to you while ur mouth is open n tools r in it, shits gay i also hat it when a stem rips the blunt open when your rolling it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mosluggo Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 LOL. AS SOON AS I SEE THAT FAT HATER WITH 8 LBS OF CAKEUP IN HER FACE READY TO BLOCK ME, I'M THROWING HER A TREAT. AND YOU FEEL ME ON THIS BASEBALL SITUATION. WHY THE FUCK AM I HEARING ABOUT THE NFL DRAFT IN JUNE!?!? WHO FUCKING CARES ABOUT ALL THESE NFL PLAYER'S LEGAL PROBLEMS IN THE OFF SEASON, WE ALL KNOW THEY'RE ALL THUG NIGGAS THAT DON'T PAY CHILD SUPPORT. How am i supposed to know which team to bet on and whos out/suspended?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ernie McCracken Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 when the alarm on this "Smart " car goes off everytime the bus or a motorcycle go by it. no one is going to steal that thing, turn it off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Feed Yer Ego Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 I HAVE TO ANSWER A BUNCH OF DUMB QUESTIONS @ JOB INTERVIEWS ALSO WHEN I GOTTA GET A HAIRCUT Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
...BeerAd632... Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 -little teeny boppers with FOX stickers on their cars, and theyre ugly as fuck... -them overwhelmingly HUGE sunglasses they wear( battered wife glasses, to hide the bruised eyes...) -them flat billed hats with the sticker still on it, and people who take them off when its raining.. defeats the purpose of the hats... -me, tryna make sense... -krylon with the 360 tips... -when i break my zipper on mah pants... -big lifted up 4 wheel drives with "pavement princess" tires on them... -the fact that im actually havin to "think" about this... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nsmbfan Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 I HAVE TO ANSWER A BUNCH OF DUMB QUESTIONS @ JOB INTERVIEWS ALSO WHEN I GOTTA GET A HAIRCUT you have to answer questions to get a hair cut? i hate it when... --- drawball gets hacked by 4chan --- my nutsack sticks to my leg in the summertime --- i use the bathroom at work only to find sloth in there destroying one of the toilets --- some dumb bitch ruins this thread for 2 pages with her aussie antics... mate --- my pay gets cut in half and my boss still talks shit to us daily --- after a hard night of drinking, you wake up in the morning and start jerkin the gerkin, then out of nowhere a fucking LEG CRAMP kills the good time along with your boner and wakes you the fuck up... drink a glass of water per pitcher next time --- when pandora stops playing music and makes you press a button --- macintosh... i'll never buy one of these pieces --- arab stores that won't let you use a debit card for purches under $3... now im supposed to carry janglin change to buy a blunt? then the bums hear me or see me with change and swarm me. fuck arab marts. /no racist --- ross... every pair of jeans bought from there fuck up on the belt loops. or im just a fatass im not sure which --- lunch is over and we have to have another fucking "meeting"... fucking fire us already so i can collect unemployment Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sars.Saw.Chicago Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 when i feel like i gotta shit when im out chillin. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spring Break '92 Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 When I spill some drink on my pants and it looks like I pissed myself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LexDiamonds Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 I hate it when I run out of weed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LexDiamonds Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 NAH BUT DEAD ASS I HATE IT WHEN THERES 5 NIGGAS ORDERING SHIT AT THE DRIVE THRU AND MY SHIT IS MAD BASIC LIKE "A #7" AND SOME OTHER NIGGA GETS EVERYTHING ON THE DOLLAR MENU MADE TO ORDER....AND MY ORDER GETS FUCKED UP. WHEN IM PLAYIN BASKETBALL AND THE BALL BOUNCES IN SOME PUDDLE OF SOME SHIT OR SOME NIGGAS SPIT OR SOMETHING WHEN IM DUMB HIGH AND I POUR MYSELF A GIANT POT FULL OF CEREAL AND IM MAD EXCITED AND I PUT ON "DONNIE BRASCO" AND IM ABOUT TO GO IN AND RELAX THEN I OPEN UP THE MILK THING AND THERE .433452 MILLILITERS OF (SPOILED) MILK IN THE SHIT. WHEN I ORDER SOME SHIT AT A RESTAURANT AND ASK FOR KETCHUP OR PEPPER OR SOME SHIT AND IM WAITIN FOR THE SHIT FOR 20 HOURS. OH SHIT ABSTRACT SAID THAT :lol: WHEN IM ON A DANCEFLOOR DANCIN WITH 2 CHICKS AND SOME NIGGA COMES UP AND SAYS SOME CORNY SHIT LIKE "HEY MAN SHARING IS CARING!" WHEN IM ON A DANCEFLOOR DANCIN WITH A BROAD AND "THE OLD NIGGA AT THE CLUB" IS RIGHT NEXT TO ME WITH SOME BITCH THAT LOOKS BORED AS HELL AND HIS FUCKIN SCREWDRIVER IS SPLASHIN ALL ON MY FUCKIN BLAZER. WHEN I ASK A GIRL TO GRAB MY PHONE CUZ ITS RINGIN AND ITS SOME OTHER BITCH AND HER CALLER ID PICTURE IS A PICTURE OF HER VAGINA AND THE GIRL PICKIN UP THE PHONE MAKES THIS FACE :hatred: WHEN MY COFFEE GETS COLD IN 5 MINUTES FLAT. WHEN MY POPS COMES TO VISIT AND THE NIGGA WAKES ME UP AT 6AM ON A SATURDAY TALMBOUT "WE GOT SHIT TO DO" WITH A TOOLBELT ON. NO WE DONT NIGGA!! YOU MAKIN UP SHIT TO DO!! WHEN MY MOMS CALLS ME MORE THAN CITIBANK TO REMIND ME TO PAY MY BILLS. WHEN IM TRYIN TO GO PLAY CARDS AND SMOKE BLUNTS WITH THESE NIGGAS AND MY GIRL IS LIKE "FINE, GO PLAY CARDS" IN THE "IF YOU GO PLAY CARDS WITH THESE NIGGAS YOU AINT GETTING YOUR DICK SUCKED FOR A MONTH" VOICE. WHEN IM DOWNTOWN AND GHETTO BUM NIGGAS LOOK AT ME AND ASK ME FOR A NEWPORT "CUZ I KNOW YOU SMOKE NEWPORTS FAM HAHA" (I KEEP ONE CAMEL IN MY PACK JUST IN CASE) These 2 are gold. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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