Shittles..TasteTheAsshole Posted November 9, 2016 Share Posted November 9, 2016 Congrats man! 9 months was around the time when the cravings really began to dwindle for me. Your first Christmas holiday season after quitting will be difficult but if you've made it this far, you can do it. Peace. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted November 9, 2016 Share Posted November 9, 2016 Thanks mate. This thread keeps me going sometimes. Like a special interest meeting ha. Rip poz. I haven't been an outwardly social person for a very long time so to be honest the christmas time doesn't hold any sentimental using thoughts. Will stick close and get through one day at a time etc etc 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SpelledWithThreeSixes Posted December 26, 2016 Share Posted December 26, 2016 Finally considering putting down the booze, at least for a little bit. Went on a drunken rampage on Friday night, pissed off everyone in the only bar in town I like, to the point I woke up Saturday morning with 4 slashed tires and had to spend a few hundred bucks I didn't have on new tires and rims. This should be the last straw. Hopefully the shakes don't try to sway me away. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boodah Posted December 27, 2016 Share Posted December 27, 2016 I've been obsessing mentally about sex for about 10 years. Random one night stands, missed opportunites, falling short with the women I was with, older of younger. Some underage. It hit hard when I was at my peak, and didn't get it in with 50 women when I was 19. I guess drugs got in the way. My first asked me not to use marijuana when we were dating, andI didn't even have a second thought. We were 17 and 16. Then I dealt with doubting my sexuality because of some mental and emotional problems. I experimented once, and knew that I was straight after that. Then I started hanging out with this bisexual friend of my older sister's, who was, not to my conciousness, deep in the game of turning girls and boys. I grew up in a Christian household, communed Catholic. Started using cocaine, and really and truly thought it would and had deeper faith in it, by the way, travel me along with the straighter and narrower path. After all that, I used coke twice this year, and now I'm 27, and I'm looking back to look forward. It's the first time I've been absolutely clear and safe in my own heart, head, spirit, that I'm straight. I find myself going back to when I was a sober 11-14 year old, taking so much of my friends' and culture's beginning's high held standards, how low I was seen by those who left safely away from the dive bar years. I'm worried about the next move with my relationships. Do I open up about my doubts? Do I tell her ever last detail? My safety 1st mentality says take it slow. I know a lot about taking it with a woman who has had years of similar emotional issues. My drug habits are way lowered this year, and I think hard as ever about others' diversity in background about these types of things. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted February 3, 2017 Share Posted February 3, 2017 1 year sober today. RIP POZ I never knew there could be life like this. Cheers to all the contributors to this thread. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted February 3, 2017 Share Posted February 3, 2017 Sorry for the no reply boodah but that stuff is way outside my knowledge base. Keep talking to people and try and find people you can identify with. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pornpasswords Posted February 8, 2017 Share Posted February 8, 2017 grow up...youre doing legal kiddy drugs...that you buy for kids at 7-11...upgrade to hard opiates... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fist 666 Posted February 8, 2017 Share Posted February 8, 2017 And go fuck yourself @pornpasswords 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CityonSMASH2017 Posted February 11, 2017 Share Posted February 11, 2017 Alcohol is bad, alcohol generates horrible decision making and shitty physical distress after its effects causing punches to the face, car accidents, clamitia via questionable sexual partners and impaired protection values. Smoke pot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boodah Posted February 18, 2017 Share Posted February 18, 2017 I wrote a horror story once. Ended up getting way too drunk, so I could zen myself the wrong way into my writing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmuroRay Posted March 5, 2017 Share Posted March 5, 2017 I've been obsessing mentally about sex for about 10 years. Random one night stands, missed opportunites, falling short with the women I was with, older of younger. Some underage. It hit hard when I was at my peak, and didn't get it in with 50 women when I was 19. I guess drugs got in the way. My first asked me not to use marijuana when we were dating, andI didn't even have a second thought. We were 17 and 16. Then I dealt with doubting my sexuality because of some mental and emotional problems. I experimented once, and knew that I was straight after that. Then I started hanging out with this bisexual friend of my older sister's, who was, not to my conciousness, deep in the game of turning girls and boys. I grew up in a Christian household, communed Catholic. Started using cocaine, and really and truly thought it would and had deeper faith in it, by the way, travel me along with the straighter and narrower path. After all that, I used coke twice this year, and now I'm 27, and I'm looking back to look forward. It's the first time I've been absolutely clear and safe in my own heart, head, spirit, that I'm straight. I find myself going back to when I was a sober 11-14 year old, taking so much of my friends' and culture's beginning's high held standards, how low I was seen by those who left safely away from the dive bar years. I'm worried about the next move with my relationships. Do I open up about my doubts? Do I tell her ever last detail? My safety 1st mentality says take it slow. I know a lot about taking it with a woman who has had years of similar emotional issues. My drug habits are way lowered this year, and I think hard as ever about others' diversity in background about these types of things. This was heart felt, thanks for being candid, although I'm sure it was cathartic to write. Sex is surely my addiction, I drink and smoke pot regularly, but have no problem going cold turkey. I've done the things you spoke about ad nauseum, my hunger for vagina is insatiable it seems. So many great nights and adventures, yet, the ones who got away or the lackluster mornings persist in the mind. Drug use definitely makes things more complicated, i'm kinky/freaky enough naturally, but weed can turn me into a sexual maniac at times. Best advice I can give you, don't fret about it, some people will never know what good sex is like. Be upfront with your lady, advice I live by. Some of the things I've told the mrs. weren't easy, there were plenty of awkward talks, unfulfilled requests, and complicated smiles, but honesty really is the best policy. The way I see it, I rather lose my woman because I revealed who I am than keep her around under the guise of being a half measure of myself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boodah Posted March 6, 2017 Share Posted March 6, 2017 A hippie stole my Dubwise sweatshirt once. I said, 'you'll see in about 9 years.' That's the wisdom. Bloodfarts x red fat caps Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
breakfast menu Posted March 24, 2017 Share Posted March 24, 2017 today i really really mangled a job interview that i was excited about. won't drink about it. want to, though. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted March 25, 2017 Share Posted March 25, 2017 Only thing that I know won't work for you is taking a drink. What makes you think you goofed the interview? And yo inj! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted March 25, 2017 Share Posted March 25, 2017 Interviews are a two way thing, if you tanked it, do not beat yourself up about it right away. Give it a while and you will probably see things in a little different light, perhaps the interviewer was an asshole, perhaps the job was over or under your skill set despite your level of enthusiasm, all kinds of things can go wrong and most of them are beyond your control. It is the worst kind of anxiety though, the after the fact with unknown variables variety. Despite offering the illusion of making problems become forgotten I have found that when dealing with regret that suppressing my central nervous system with alcohol does not actually help me process the situation to arrive at any positive outcomes. I also blew a potential job recently, I am not really wanting to move but an ideal job popped up. I sort of half-assed the process and may well have taken myself out of the running because of it. Such is life, I held back because of the most ridiculous idea of loyalty to my current boss and perhaps my career will pay the price, or perhaps I dodged the bullet on a shitty job...I may never know. Congrats on the anniversaries to those that have em, I am still doing the sober thing but have not gone to meetings or anything for a long while now. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
breakfast menu Posted March 27, 2017 Share Posted March 27, 2017 thanks guys. have had a bit of time to step away from it and talked to the sponsor and mostly resolved what happened. (that stuff = essential, always run your nonsense through someone else if you have the option...) it was a bit my fault but also a terrible fit with the interviewer, who would have been my boss' boss. her and i weren't getting on at all and she hadn't reviewed my portfolio or any application materials prior to my arrival so i had to rush through them. not how i envisioned my introduction to this job, which is 10 minutes from my house and pays well (and is next to a good bench spot in my area). i'd built it up in my head to be the perfect job. but those high expectations were mine to set, and mine to fall from. an experience like that sucks for anyone, in or out of recovery, but i'm grateful for a sober network that'll catch me when i get all up in my head. good to see y'all. how you been @theprotester ???????? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted March 27, 2017 Share Posted March 27, 2017 It is a red flag that the person who would be your boss did not do the interview. Speaking of interviews, I am off to one right now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
breakfast menu Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 good luck morton! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 Thanks, now I gotta decide whether to take the job or not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 Nice one Mort. @breakfast menu I'm good mate. Reskilling at school these days. Living back in the city. Wild. No drink or drug for 14 months now. How you tracking yourself, mate? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shittles..TasteTheAsshole Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 Five years to this day I'm still alcohol free. I have not had a drop. Can't believe i made it half a decade. :smile: 3 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 Congratulations mate. Great to hear. Stay up 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted August 1, 2017 Share Posted August 1, 2017 Weird spam Troll? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
asthma al Posted August 4, 2017 Share Posted August 4, 2017 don't drink much Bud or Coors , but I'm go and say Coors > Bud Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted August 31, 2017 Share Posted August 31, 2017 International Overdose Day today. Pour out a lemonade for those lost to the disease. RIP to so many. Stay up y'all hope you're all doing well today. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fatbastard Posted September 6, 2017 Share Posted September 6, 2017 Pour out a lemonade for those lost to the disease. Preferably pink lemonade. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kalashnikov Posted January 25, 2018 Share Posted January 25, 2018 Bumping this back up since it's been a while. Definitely RIP to POZ and Swords. Never met the former in real life but the latter was the homie. Just makes it sink in how real this shit actually is, it's all fun and games at first before addiction sets in. Glad to see the updates on here though regardless, props to those of you who are still sober and much love to everyone who is still fighting and attempting. The last time I posted here I was still using heroin and on methadone. I can proudly say now that I have been off both for a little over 2 years. Longest I've gone without doing drugs since I started doing drugs, definitely the longest I've been off heroin. Funny thing is, I have no desire to use anymore. Sure, I think about it some days, but it's not worth throwing away everything I've accumulated since I stopped using. I will say though I'm not sober by NA/AA standards as I still drink, usually once or twice a week. I can't smoke weed anymore, for whatever reason the past like 5 times I tried, it just gave me panic attacks, so I said fuck it. I never really enjoyed it all that much anyways, it would always make me second guess everything I said. I've been working, working out, that's about it. One thing I wanted to bring up was how I don't feel like I belong to the "normal" society. Like... I don't know how to really put it, kind of a strange feeling. I feel more at home with the addicts, the degenerates, whatever. Working a normal job and trying to meet healthy friends has proven tough, especially since I moved 1000 miles away. I was always good at finding other addicts, but when I meet new people (potential romantic interests especially) I just feel out of place. It doesn't help that dropping the, "I used to be a heroin addict" line on a girl I'm into is a huge bomb in itself. Anybody have thoughts or advice? 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted January 26, 2018 Share Posted January 26, 2018 Still think of this thread often. I'll be two years clean and sober next week and the things poz said you here gave me hope back then 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted February 12, 2018 Share Posted February 12, 2018 Who would have thought this would have been influenced so strongly by the oontz Vast 1 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shittles..TasteTheAsshole Posted February 12, 2018 Share Posted February 12, 2018 Respect man. 2 years is big time, I'll cheers to that with a double shot of espresso. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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