Mr_Mackel Posted October 8, 2009 Share Posted October 8, 2009 don't ever.. EVER touch a cop. technically that's assaulting a police officer. wish i would have read this last thurs...heres one dont go out after mixing lots of henny and patron...and continue the mixture in the club. will land u in jail... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
and... Posted October 8, 2009 Share Posted October 8, 2009 smile more often. nh Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
423894 Posted October 8, 2009 Share Posted October 8, 2009 Volunteer. It doesnt matter where or for how long. Give your time to someone who really needs it. You will never know how thankful they are for that time you spent with them. I say this from experience. Do something incredibly polite for someone. Get your mom flowers, wash your dads car, shovel the snow from your neighbours sidewalk, pay for a random persons coffee in the morning. Life opens up to those who are open to it, and good deeds are the key to that door. Use LED christmas lights. Although they are a bit more money they will last your entire life and they suck WAY less juice. Dried and skinned apples are good for cleaning just about any surface. Especially getting bugs off the front of the car. You can use a 17mm socket to nearly take apart any japanese car. You can make a popcorn popper out of a beer can for camping. If you freeze a bee it will come back to life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nsmbfan Posted October 8, 2009 Share Posted October 8, 2009 Shit I learned on survivor man: ANIMAL SHIT - dry it, use it to keep the fire burning. this, with a little kindling, will keep red to burn for a fire the next day. BOILING NASTY WATER - you can use a PLASTIC water bottle for this... just don't let the flame touch the part of the plastic the water doesn't touch. the water will boil without the plastic getting hot enough to melt - thus, making it drinkable. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dowmagik Posted October 8, 2009 Share Posted October 8, 2009 run if she wont let you look at the puss, something is up only order small size drinks at fast food spots cause u get free refills you dumb fuck lady bugs dont eat spider mites dont ride a motorcycle with shorts on if she lets you finger her asshole in front of your friends at the stripclub, dont marry her 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tango 24 Posted October 8, 2009 Share Posted October 8, 2009 goon bag pillows essential 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted October 8, 2009 Author Share Posted October 8, 2009 I am not sure what a goon bag pillow is. If you have finished off a box of wine and need a nap but have no pillow simply inflate the empty bladder with air and you have a nice small pillow to help you slumber. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nsmbfan Posted October 8, 2009 Share Posted October 8, 2009 If you have finished off a box of wine and need a nap but have no pillow simply inflate the empty bladder with air and you have a nice small pillow to help you slumber. wino run if she wont let you look at the puss, something is up if she lets you finger her asshole in front of your friends at the stripclub, dont marry her 1. real gangsta ass niggas don't run fast 2. best advice right there... best advice. this, and wash your face before your ass, should be printed on business cards and handed out in high schools 3. your wife sounds cool. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JohnLester#31 Posted October 14, 2009 Share Posted October 14, 2009 Shave with cold water. Wash your face with hot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted October 14, 2009 Author Share Posted October 14, 2009 What? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlackbookKWC Posted October 14, 2009 Share Posted October 14, 2009 it burns less Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nsmbfan Posted October 14, 2009 Share Posted October 14, 2009 i heard warm water opens your pores, makes it easier to shave the hair. what u say is backwards edit: or my razorburn is a tell tale sign that i am wrong... again Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RELAPSER Posted October 14, 2009 Share Posted October 14, 2009 ^^^ agreed. what's this shaving with cold water nonsense? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlackbookKWC Posted October 14, 2009 Share Posted October 14, 2009 i heard warm water opens your pores, makes it easier to shave the hair. what u say is backwards edit: or my razorburn is a tell tale sign that i am wrong... again Your probably right I fucked up. Whatever. Don't smoke a lot of grits (or any). De-odorize your pits. Suck on her tits. :cool: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted October 14, 2009 Author Share Posted October 14, 2009 Well, I think the we can put the cold water shaving idea to rest. Although not quite a everyday tip I would like to put forth that when entering a long term live in relationship with a female it is wise to hold back a little on doing all the cooking, cleaning etc. As a single father I was quite accustomed to doing all the house work and cleaning on my own and continued to do so when I began living with my lady. I do not mind doing everything especially with her as the main breadwinner now but think it would have been smart to hold back on one or two tasks. I was talking with a friend one time about cooking and he had some good tips. At the same time he was bitching about his wife's cooking, I asked him why he did not just teach her how to cook and he said "then she would know that I can cook and I would end up doing all the cooking". Just a thought. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SMdoubleXL Posted October 14, 2009 Share Posted October 14, 2009 my brother told me some shit close to that...when being bitched at for doing things wrong/incomplete...he simply said... "if i dont do it to your liking, you will either a-come behind me and do it right... or b-tell me not to do it again. - either way, im not going to exhaust any more effort than i have to" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rewind Posted October 15, 2009 Share Posted October 15, 2009 always side-chain compress your kicks around your bass. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
famecrazy Posted October 15, 2009 Share Posted October 15, 2009 cleanliness is next to godliness - This is relevant to all aspects of life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlackbookKWC Posted October 15, 2009 Share Posted October 15, 2009 but god isnt real. key to life...dont believe in a snake in a tree. dont be stupid Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SerialSkiller Posted October 15, 2009 Share Posted October 15, 2009 my brother told me some shit close to that...when being bitched at for doing things wrong/incomplete...he simply said... "if i dont do it to your liking, you will either a-come behind me and do it right... or b-tell me not to do it again. - either way, im not going to exhaust any more effort than i have to" i used to use this heaps to get out of doin shit 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
famecrazy Posted October 15, 2009 Share Posted October 15, 2009 - there ain't no such thing as a free breakfast. - can't soar with eagles when you're chillin with turkeys. - spend money to make money. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bonsai Bill Posted October 15, 2009 Share Posted October 15, 2009 switch up your everyday routine, even if its something as small as going down a different street 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tipsycripsy420 Posted October 15, 2009 Share Posted October 15, 2009 Expand your vocabulary. Try to pick up on a new word atleast once a week. Don't spend too much time sleeping. More than eight hours is typically going to make your more tired. Always remember who you are with, and if they are willing to take an ass beating with you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DIRTY D Posted October 15, 2009 Share Posted October 15, 2009 beat it everymorning so you dont think about sex for the rest of the day Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted October 15, 2009 Author Share Posted October 15, 2009 ^That does not work for me. Here is another misguided path I walked down during a slow stretch with the ladies; going without masturbation until achieving the real thing. If you go 6 weeks with out letting one fly you are not going to be much of a stallion when the deal goes down. Oh well, I gave her the best 60 seconds of her life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vanfullofretards Posted October 15, 2009 Share Posted October 15, 2009 ........................................................Read Books. ........................................Exercise. ................................................................Write graffiti. ......................................................Get money. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
you snooze you looze Posted October 15, 2009 Share Posted October 15, 2009 ^That does not work for me. Here is another misguided path I walked down during a slow stretch with the ladies; going without masturbation until achieving the real thing. If you go 6 weeks with out letting one fly you are not going to be much of a stallion when the deal goes down. Oh well, I gave her the best 60 seconds of her life. this has happened to me too Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SMdoubleXL Posted October 19, 2009 Share Posted October 19, 2009 i was recently told, by someone who does job training, if you're going on a job interview, to not wear cologne. If there is a woman interviewing you, and you possibly wear a cologne that might remind her of someone who did her wrong, chances are...you might not get the job. this applies mostly to men interviewers. She said this is a common flaw. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nsmbfan Posted October 19, 2009 Share Posted October 19, 2009 hows she going to interview me when she's answering the phones? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edward Orenthal Norton Posted October 19, 2009 Share Posted October 19, 2009 if youre in college dont let yourself get behind on homework. EVER i made the mistake of falling into my procrastinating habits and now im having to double up just to pass the classes. as long as you do all of your homework and get decent grades on your tests you should pass almost everything you take. pick a major that not only interest you but something that you know you will be successful at and be able not to have to starve/work for the rest of you life. healthcare is a great industry always in demand because americans are hypochondriacs by nature. dont always take the easy route. take the hard one that might not have a huge pay off. but it will build character and make other challenging things seem less intimidating. you can use the same caps for years if you clean them out with a spray solvent. just put the clogged cap on the can. give it a couple pumps. than let it sit until the solvents eat threw the paint until in sprays smoothly again. never throw away bank/atm receipts in public trash cans. a lot of identity theft happens this way. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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