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Funniest things YOU'VE heard said by girls....


Dirty_habiT

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My girl says lotsof things that if I didn't love her I'd hate her for acting so stupid

 

"I like our anniversary, cuz it's a time on the clock"...aside from how retarded that is on its own, you also need to take into account how few dates aren't times on a clock

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Her: "You wanna try this another way?"

Me: "What, you mean doggystyle?"

Her: "Kind of..."

 

hahaha, memories.

 

 

"are you sure your not black?"

"yea, pretty sure"

"wow"

 

 

oh, and my fav, weirdest... "do me like ted bundy" after seein that movie.

i was like "what the fuck, you serious?" "yes",

so i layed it down... with no hittin.

 

that shit had me BALLIN. i had to hop off for 5 mins.

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I don't know if I've shared this one, but:

 

I'm in the tattoo shop, sitting in the chair, waiting to get work done, and one of the guys is talking..

"So last night, It's about a half-hour to closing, and this girl walks in, and asks, "Do you guys do cover-up work?" So I say, "Depends on what needs to be done." So she replies, "How about a partial cover-up?" So, I'm thinking 'What The Fuck?!?!'-" What do you mean Partial Cover-Up?" So she pulls back her sleeve, and theres a huge forearm piece, in Olde English letters, reads "Derrick" And it hits me: "So what, youre dating a guy named Rick now?" She responds "How did you know?"

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hahaha, memories.

 

 

"are you sure your not black?"

"yea, pretty sure"

"wow"

 

 

oh, and my fav, weirdest... "do me like ted bundy" after seein that movie.

i was like "what the fuck, you serious?" "yes",

so i layed it down... with no hittin.

 

that shit had me BALLIN. i had to hop off for 5 mins.

 

 

You're a fucking idiot. Seriously, if I could fucking stab your eye through the internet I would right now.

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"its YOUR baby"

 

 

Hah I have this one chicka friend who told me she got pregnant recently. She hadnt told me who hit her with the jizz but she was asking ym advice about all kinds of shit.

 

me: Who is the dad? You need to tell your family.

 

her: I cant say, they will hate me.

 

me: Why not you need the support.

 

her: You dont get it, I told them it was yours!

 

me: What the fuck? Your a clown.

 

I dont know if its funny, more fucking rediculous than anything considering I never tapped.

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Prone2Savageness: Mkay...

censored: mkaymkay maky thats all you fucking ever say why the FUCK DONT YOU CARE ABOUT ANYTHING FUCK

Prone2Savageness: Because you're umm.. crazy.

censored: IM ONLYY FUCKING CARAZY CAUSE YOU FUCKING DONT CARE

Prone2Savageness: Yeah but, I don't care because you're crazy. So maybe if you stopped being crazy and got some crazy pills or something, then we could have a nice conversation where you're not being crazy, and I'd begin to actually care about talking to you. Where as right now, I think you're crazy and I don't want to.

censored: FUCK YOU YOUR CRAZY

Prone2Savageness: Right between the two of us, I'm the crazy one.

Prone2Savageness: You're*

censored: YAH YOU FUCKING ARE THE FUCKING CRAZY ONE YOU STUPID FAG

Prone2Savageness: Yeah, you're really making some awesome points here.

censored: FUCK YOU IM GONNA GO KILL MYSELF RIGHT NOW

censored went away at 1:48:19 AM.

censored returned at 1:55:25 AM.

censored: SEE YOU DONT EVEN CARE I COULD OF BEEN DEAD

Prone2Savageness: I don't care because you're crazy, I've already made this point.

censored: YOU ONLY CARE ABOUT YOUR FUCKING GRAFFITI STUPID WEBSITE

censored: STUPID KIDS WHO BREAK THE LAW AND YOU JUST JOKE ABOUT FUCKING PEEING IN BUTTS YER AN IDIOT

Prone2Savageness: If you let me pee in your butt I actually might start to care, because at least then you'd be a crazy girl who lets me pee in her butt. Right now you have nothing to offer me but caps and misspelled words. I can't do anything with that.

censored: FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111

Prone2Savageness: Hold on...

censored: okay

 

I actually just signed off after this.

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censored: YAH YOU FUCKING ARE THE FUCKING CRAZY ONE YOU STUPID FAG

Prone2Savageness: Yeah, you're really making some awesome points here.

censored: FUCK YOU IM GONNA GO KILL MYSELF RIGHT NOW

censored went away at 1:48:19 AM.

censored returned at 1:55:25 AM.

censored: SEE YOU DONT EVEN CARE I COULD OF BEEN DEAD

Prone2Savageness: I don't care because you're crazy, I've already made this point.

 

 

 

 

awesome....this is why i still keep in touch with you dude

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