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mandy marilyn britney tiffany candice brandy heather channing brianna amber sabrina melody dakota sierra baby crystal samantha autumn ruby taylor tara tammy laura sharlene shantelle courtney misty jenny crista mindy noelle shelby triona riba cassandra nicky kelsey shauna joline erline claudia savannah casey dolly kendra collen chloe demi emma F**KIN BECKY!!?

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crappyskullaxeguitar1.jpg

 

 

New perfume smells of semen and sweat

 

 

Want a scent with a distinct fragrance that no one else has?

Well, blood, sweat, saliva and a dollop of sperm is just the thing for the stinking rich, if a perfume on sale at Harvey Nichols is anything to go by.

PerfumeSOLENT_450x350.jpg The Sécrétions Magnifiques perfume

The perfume, Sécrétions Magnifiques, contains the smell of all those things and still sells for £76 a pop.

Maker Etat Libre d'Orange markets it as a raunchy alternative to the likes of Poison and Chanel No.5, calling it 'subversive' and 'disturbing'.

The company said: 'It's love or hate at first sight. Like blood, sweat, sperm, saliva, Sécrétions Magnifiques is as real as an olfactory coitus that sends one into raptures, to the pinnacle of sensual pleasure.

'Tongues and sexes find one another, pleasure explodes and all goes wild.'

The perfume mixes accords – a blending of scents – to recreate the smell of blood, sweat, saliva and semen with the more pleasant odours of coconut and sandalwood. Perfume expert Roja Dove said the aroma was a refreshing alternative to bland fragrances.

'The kind of people who will like this range are people who think they are being really, really alternative and going against the establishment and being really rather racy,' he said.

'But it is a bit of a mystery why anyone would want to smell of sweat, blood, saliva and sperm.'

Another perfume in the range is Jasmin et Cigarette, which does exactly what it says on the tin, stinking of jasmine and uh, cigarettes.

A spokesman for Harvey Nichols, the only shop in the country to stock the range, insisted it was popular. 'Niche fragrances tend to do very well in our fragrance offering,' he said.

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Shocking+Pink+Dragon+Centipede.jpgAll sorts of species have been discovered in Greater Mekong (part of Thailand) of late, and I'm here to share some with you, thanks to multiple submissions by you, the readers.

 

First and foremost, we have the Shocking Pink Dragon Millipede (Desmoxytes purpurosea). Yes, that's it's real name. Here's your Word of the Day: aposematic. Etymologically speaking, it is derived from Latin: apo- away, and sematic sign/meaning. Aposematism is most common in the animal world, and consists of all sorts of vivid coloring and other signs designed to broadcast the fact that the colorful creature is in fact poisonous/toxic/dangerous/cantankerous.

 

Doesn't each of us practice some aposematism? Maybe it's a warning frown, a step-back gesture, a hand gun, body odor, you name it.

 

In the instance of the shocking pink dragon millipede, its hot pink coloring means stand back, because I can shoot cyanide. They even give off the tell-tale smell of almonds associated with cyanide. There are 23 species of dragon millipedes, but the shocking pink millipede is the largest of them (now it's just showing off).

 

The problem with being hot pink is that was is aposematic to one creature might be a lure to another. If one of my daughters spotted one of these crawling across the floor, she'd squeal with delight and try to pick it up. A few spine punctures and a dose of cyanide later, she might begin to associate anything pink with pain, much to Pavlov's and Skinner's delight.

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