1988 Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 Masturbating woman shakes Michigan Uni frat house Bushwhacking intruder makes herself right at home By Lester Haines → More by this author Published Monday 2nd April 2007 15:10 GMT A Michigan University frat house will throw out two couches tainted by a mystery masturbating female intruder who used the furniture for an extended public self-pleasuring session, The Michigan Daily reports. The woman in question simply walked into Pi Kappa Alpha fraternity house "without permission" last Thursday, "entered the house's living room, took off her clothes and started masturbating", according to shaken frat president Dan Nye. Shocked frat members "asked the woman to leave the house, but she refused and continued masturbating for about half an hour". When pressed as to whether she felt ok, the beaver-petting stranger "casually replied that she was fine" and even made a quick call on her mobile phone while tickling the taco. Frat members eventually called police, who arrived just after the bushwhacking stranger had made good her escape "wearing only a thigh-length black coat". The subsequent police report said the woman had told witneses she was called Melissa and was a student at Eastern Michigan University. She "appeared to be under the influence of drugs", the report notes. Nye concluded: "Obviously, she was very disturbed. It was not how a normal person would respond to people." ® Bootnote No one is quite sure just how "Melissa" got into Pi Kappa Alpha's premises, but Nye rather brilliantly said "she could have entered through the front door, which was left propped open while it was being repaired". SOURCE: http://www.theregister.com/2007/04/02/frat_house_intruder/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lord_casek Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 why did they ask her to leave? gay frats. haha. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stay bay wit it. Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 why would you call the cops? i just dont understand. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GEEB Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 what did she look like? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anotherwhitekidwithabeard Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 they dont sound like all the frat boys i know Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lord_casek Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 they dont sound like all the frat boys i know less gay or more? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirtydoses Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 yeah you don't ask her to leave, you ask her if she needs a hand. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GamblersGrin Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 there is a large piece missing to this puzzle Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lord_casek Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 there is a large piece missing to this puzzle nah, there isn't. some girl decides to do these dudes a favor and instead they try and talk to her and then call the cops. gay fraternity. call me a columbo, b/c this case is solved. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anotherwhitekidwithabeard Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 less gay or more? the ones i know can be pretty gay at times, but they def wouldnt ask a chick flicking her bean on their couch to leave and call the cops Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lord_casek Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 the ones i know can be pretty gay at times, but they def wouldnt ask a chick flicking her bean on their couch to leave and call the cops sounds like all the frat boys i've ever met. can be gay, but most wouldn't call the cops or get rid of the furniture. wtf is wrong with these guys. i'm gonna email them and ask if she was fugly or something. oh yeah, i do know some pi kap's and they were by far the most stuck up ass faggot butt munchkins on the face of the planet. site is down http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&ct=res&cd=1&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.msupikes.org%2F&ei=t4URRvrVMoeWgwTYwdycAw&usg=__b6NLha8yS94ua2OyOO-DZ_GnfBk=&sig2=JoCdElODwy7kTLWxcSzHIg Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drue_Down Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 That frat *smacks* of Homo Dungeon! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZeroCool Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 less gay or more? nice play old chap Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lord_casek Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 nice play old chap indeed! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IrishCarBombs Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 crazy homo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abracadabra Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 this thread is useless without pictures Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
groyn shmoyn Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 DUUUUUUDE!!!! BROOOO!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stay bay wit it. Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 this thread is useless without pictures this man knows whats up Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gat Bush Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 even if the chick wasnt model status, i still would drink my beer and enjoy the show. fuck frats. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deterrent Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 Those fags didn't fuck that hole? Fucking stupid frat doods. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AyeBee Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 This reaks of teh ghey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vacuum cleaner Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 frats are the new ghey! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gat Bush Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 udd ghey. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vivre Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 she must have been ugly as shit Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InnerCityRebel Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 I WOULD HAVE ASKED IF SHE NEEDED HELP..sorry about the caps Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
groyn shmoyn Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 she prolly had gingivitis in her vagi. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fuse=--action Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 Frat dudes angry about a chick coming in and masturbating on their couch? And they're throwing the couch away on top of it? She must have been supremely unattractive. -fuse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beantownbeatz Posted April 3, 2007 Share Posted April 3, 2007 id hit it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
^ . ^ Posted April 3, 2007 Share Posted April 3, 2007 shouldve had a gang-bang. ....just sayin. :huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iloveboxcars Posted April 3, 2007 Share Posted April 3, 2007 i would have said she can come back anytime.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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