Getting Laid

[duh-rye-won]

i only knew of the shogun movie.

 

we can continue this discussion in the ^o^ thread if you'd like.

 

i don't want to interrupt milton droppin knowledge on acquiring poontang.

[kaesthebluntedwonder]

I like gatita's advice.

 

I would read through this thread, but instead I'm gonna go watch 'Swingers'.

[Guest -MOE LESTER-]

Originally posted by TURBOCAPSLOK@Dec 28 2004, 06:14 PM

I GET LAID AROUND THREE TIMES A DAY. SO THIS THREAD CAN DO NOTHING FOR ME

Quoted post

me too

[ASER1NE]

Heres the best plan , i also use it most of the time ...

 

- convincing the girl that she needs you more than you need her is TRUTH .

Once you do that keep the girl around fro awhile and youll get laid all the time , seriously like everyday . then you dont have to worry about chasing girls all the time .

 

Find one and keep her around , its worth it .

[GnomeToys]

YOU ARE EDUCATED STUPID

[Carl Winslow.]

never did like these threads dating back to the "how to get laid" thread. i dunno i always thought there's certain things you shouldn't try to break down into a science cuz you just lame it up and make it gay. it's like making a "how to be hood" thread and breaking it down to a science and teaching you "du-rag tying 101" and what degree-angle to to tilt your baseball hat.. either you're hood or you're not. same with gettin laid what happened to the old-fashioned way of learning through trial-and-error and improving your game and skills by experience. i just always thought trying to propose a scientology of "getting laid" on the internet was lame. not saying there's no knowledge being spit cuz there is, but if you're really relying on 12oz to help you get pussy then there's little hope for you to begin with.

[Milton]

What can I say? I'm a social scientist at heart...

[dkab]

Originally posted by Carl Winslow.@Dec 29 2004, 06:27 PM

alot of intelligent and relavant stuff.

Quoted post

 

Just like going on the internet to learn how to graff, it's lame.

[Guest sneak]

the last time i got laid by pulling a girl was in a club.

she was with a friend who was getting with someone i knew so i went over and sat next to her on a sofa. she wasnt looking happy about the situation so i just chatted to her. eventually i got a smile out of her and complimented her on it. worked for me.

[Kr430n5_666]

boring

[nomadawhat]

Originally posted by Milton@Dec 28 2004, 12:42 PM

The toolbox approach:

Attempting to get laid is like attempting to build or fix something. You need certain tools to get the job done.

 

Quoted post

 

 

Tease has been know to take this approach a little bit too literally.... hard hat and all.

[dpuerto]

what a bunch of fuck shit.

 

#1 Don't listen to this guy he is only trying to further set you back in your pussy career.

 

#2 There's always a girl who already wants to fuck you. Go fuck her. Infact the best way to understand women is to be with one. Get a girlfriend and you'll be able to pick her brain for everything, you will learn her inside and out. then make her break up with you. Force her to go through all lengths to try and make your life hell. Yeah, that's right, because then you will understand a female's mentality. After that you know all the warning signs, and all the right things to do. Just see a fine girl go up to her and be like I saw you from over there and I knew I had to come up to you and meet you. Introduce yourself, ask her name, do whatchu do pimpin and you if you dont move onto the next step (saying you gotta get back over there, and geting her number, then leaving for over there) then you know it wasnt meant to be. and move on to the next gurl. If you do end up engaging in conversation ask a buch of questions, try and stimulate her mind, and makeher laugh, keep it upbeat and then move on to the next step.. if it's going really good, you can ask her, "What r u doing tonight, if you dont got any plans we should do something" Beotch. that shit always works.

 

Last night I went ona group date, as in me and a group of girls. I sat between two girls and I was like i can move if this is making you too horny. Fucking whores. All girls are. He says you never know a girl. they are all sluts and so are yoU!

[Neskoner]

is it that hard to get laid???the first time i had sex i didnt even want the girl..its not that complicated unless you try too hard....

[dpuerto]

exactly. get off the internet and into some pussy babay!

 

 

I remember when my mom came home... I was 15, and she was supposed to be at work. Well i met these two blonde 14 year olds. the biggest whores of all time. 14 year olds that is. These two girls called me asking me how i felt about whipped creme and all this, i let them know i had that coolwhip in the fridge. they came over, and we got to it. I got head with whipped creme by two girls before i even had my permit. WEST SIDE!

 

drip drip drip.

[Milton]

Hey kids, if you don't like what im saying tune it out, don't come in here with your half baked theories about getting a girl to break up with you. You get every girl you want? More power to you. This is for guys that don't, cause lets be honest, most guys dont. I don't. You see a fine girl and say "I saw you from over there..?" Most of the girls I fuck with would laugh at you. Thats real. But go ahead, use your tired ass lines, get your pimpin on. Have fun at life...

[»§ÜGÅR«]

acting like girls are all whores is just a SPECTACULAR way to woo them. :nope:

 

Puerto- u win the prize for the person w/ the most retarded view of women, in this thread.

 

like milton said..if some dude walked up to me with that "i saw you over there" phrase, i'd look at him like he was some kinda nutcase..

[T=E=A=S=E]

Originally posted by nomadawhat+Dec 29 2004, 06:31 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (nomadawhat - Dec 29 2004, 06:31 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteBegin-Milton@Dec 28 2004, 12:42 PM

The toolbox approach:

Attempting to get laid is like attempting to build or fix something.  You need certain tools to get the job done. 

 

Quoted post

 

 

Tease has been know to take this approach a little bit too literally.... hard hat and all.

Quoted post

[/b]

 

:lol: :king:

[Milton]

Thanks gorgeous,

 

This motherfucker pissed me off too. What are you like 17? Be serious. There's a whole world outside your neighborhood and your highschool bro. Honestly, you think you understand women? Cause all women are sluts and so are you? Like I said, before you go off half cocked about how you're a p-i-m-p in your g unit sneakers, you need to realize that you don't know shit. Ya, maybe that shit works on the 14 year old sluts around your way that will suck your dick for a dime sack, but in the grown up world that shit will get you NOWHERE...

 

I'm starting a new lesson now...

[Tough Love]

milton is right....all your highschool lines and shit dont do jack all once u get out of highschool and into the grown up world. when ur older than say 17 u actually have to talk about interesting things in order to get anywhere...and not act all hip hop and baked all the time :rolleyes:

[Guest]

enough of the hate,

more of the educate!

[Milton]

Administrative Matters:

Disclaimer: I am not a professional, I don't get laid every night [there are positively people on here, whose names I won't mention, who get laid with more frequency and a higher success rate than I do; ask rental I'm not the best looking motherfucker in the entire world.], there are girls that for whatever reason I can't get with despite every effort I make. You don't have to take my advice. All I can offer you is what works for me, in situations where I need it to work. I offer you the perspective of a straight man that has had tons [not literally] of female friends [we'll get to bagging them later.] Do I know all the answers? Fuck no, if somebody does, please let me know. All I can do is push you in the right direction, you have to take it from there...

 

 

Lesson two: Tools for every occasion...

 

These are the things you need every time you're trying to get laid, they're like tease's hard hat, like a good pair of gloves and a pocket knife, never go on the job site without em...

 

A Good Dose of Confidence:

This is a hard one to get when you start out, confidence is a fragile thing, but its the first thing you need when you're trying to get laid. Over-confidence is better than lacking confidence, I know a lot of girls that will sleep with a cocky asshole before they'll sleep with a nice guy with low self esteem. The key is to do everything bold. My roomate once told me "the key to living in LA is that you can do whatever you want as long as you do it with a lot of money." The same is true of confidence, boldness, you can do whatever you want as long as you do it boldly, with no hesitation. If you're doing something its the right thing to do because you're doing it. Before you talk to a girl say to yourself "She'd be lucky to have me..." You have to believe its true, this is the biggest secret.

 

Thick Skin:

Also key, this is the gloves in your toolbox. You will get rejected, probably more often than you'll get laid. As a matter of fact from what I hear the best I've seen from a guy trying to get laid is around 1/3 [strictly trying to get laid that night], don't expect to get every girl you approach. If half or more will give you the time of day at all, and allow you to talk to them, consider yourself lucky. A bit of poker wisdom for you, what seperates great players from good players is that great players can take a loss and still perform at the highest level when others would play injured. Thats how you need to approach women. If one says no say to yourself "thats her loss [remember confidence, she'd be lucky to have you] there's another one around the corner." And there probably quite literally is another one around the corner, your mission is to find her and try again.

 

Persistance:

With thick skin comes persistance. I'm not saying its a pure numbers game, you can improve your chances, but when it comes down to it it is about the numbers. When you approach a woman you're selling her on yourself, and quoting 'Boiler Room' [available on VHS and DVD] "Sales is a contact sport, the more people you contact the more successful you'll be." If there are 10 women at a bar you find attractive and you haven't talked to half of them by the time the night is over, you're unsucessful, you need to rethink what you're doing. The exception is if you're sucessful the first or second or third time and she wants to leave right then. If not, you excuse yourself after a sufficient period to get her number and talk to her for a while, and then you move on. Just because she gave you her number doesn't mean you're obligated to sit around talking to her only and ignoring your friends, other girls etc.

 

A Plan:

For goodness sake, you need a damn plan. This part is tricky because you can't come up with a good plan until you have a good handle on the situation, what tools you need etc. We'll discuss getting a good read in the next lesson. But for now, just realize that in the first few minutes of talking to her, with practice you'll realize where you need to go from here. Most people say "you're overanalyzing, just let it come naturally," most people in their minds are doing the same exact thing and not being honest with themselves. If you are consciously aware that you have a goal, and that there are certain steps necessary to execute on that goal, then you will be that much further ahead in achieving that goal. Just remember, make one plan with alternates and room for improvisation, because things will not always go according to your plan, you read might not be great [especially in the beginning.] But believe me having a solid plan in your mind will get you far.

 

Respect for your opponent:

Yes I stole the "women are the enemy" bit from 'An assholes guide to handling chicks' [Available for under 10 bucks from Amazon.com] but I'm building on it. A woman is a human being, with intellect, and wisdom and craftiness just like you. The image of the woman waiting by the phone for a man to call her and falling for every line is dead [except perhaps where puerto lives and every chick would fuck your whole crew for a loosie and some bubble gum]. But honestly, you have to understand that women are genetically better equipped to deal with interpersonal relations, you are 'figting' with an opponent that is better at what you are doing than you are. Deal with it, learn to love that challenge.

 

No Guilt:

A lot of guys think that by getting laid, they're doing something bad, that it's immoral to want a woman to sleep with you without a relationship. If this is your belief, religious or otherwise, and you feel that it is immoral, I will not try to change your belief. [Don't swing for a girl, see below] Get in a relationship and get laid that way, you can use most of these steps to get in a relationship too, if you're looking for companionship. I'm going to add notes every time you could end up in a relationship, and the best way to do that. But if you really want to get laid and you're, in the words of Pacino "caught up in a middle class morality," do what he suggests "get shut of it, shut it out." If you only believe that because you think you should you will never get laid until you get over that half hearted belief. You'll shoot yourself in the foot, every time. As yourself this, what is wrong with two consenting adults, doing something that is beneficial to both of them. Granted, I would never propose or even condone lying to a girl to get her into bed. Granted, everybody lies, but convincing a girl that you want more, so she'll sleep with you, is wrong and I don't practice nor believe in it. I don't play anybody, I'm honest with myself and others, thats how I justify sleeping with women I'm not dating. I don't lie, I'm not out to hurt anyone, my actions don't cause harm to others, how is it wrong? You have to figure it out for yourself.

 

Be yourself:

For fucks sake, women do not want a clone, a puppy dog, or a stalker. Don't swing for them, don't be something you're not to make her want you, she won't. This goes back to the key of confidence. You have to realize that you are the most attractive you can be as yourself. [Listen to Gatita, not only is she hot, she's also brilliant ;)]. Don't change your life, morals, values, personality, to get laid. You have to do you if you expect her to.

 

 

Thats all for today, practice makes perfect, haters take dirt trips...

[Neskoner]

A plan???i think thats the only place where your wrong,because if one part of the plan doesnt work the whole thing crumbles...trust me,it happens.

[Milton]

Originally posted by MaKeItHaPpEn@Dec 29 2004, 08:30 PM

A plan???i think thats the only place where your wrong,because if one part of the plan doesnt work the whole thing crumbles...trust me,it happens.

Quoted post

 

 

Thanks for bringing this up, I thought I made it clear, but clearly I didn't. You need a plan with alternatives and room to manuever. You need a solid basis of what you're trying to do, and a plan of how to adapt if the need arises. Abraham Lincoln once said in preparing for a debate he spent "One third of the time thinking about what he was going to say and two thirds thinking about what his opponent would say." This is the same way with women, your plan is not linear, instead of "I'm going to do X Y and Z and then shes going to sleep with me," it should be like "I'm going to do X, if she does Y I'm going to do A, If she does Z I'm going to do B..." and so on, its a flow chart not a linear graph...

 

Also, there is no way you're going to have a sold plan for the first few times you try this. You won't trust me. A plan is like taking the tools out of the toolbox, ya, maybe you will need a tool you didn't plan for that you didn't take out, so you'll have to run back to the tool box and get it. But it is much more efficient to have all the tools you think you need on hand at the time. Listen, salesmen have what they call rebuttals, they have a plan, then they have planned for what you are going to counter their argument with and they have a list of things they can say to turn it back the way they want it. This is what you need.

Actually you only need this in the middle of the range, when you first start, you won't be able to figure out a good plan, and you'll continue to keep adapting. When you're really good you can play it by ear knowing all of the tools you'll need by heart, how they work, and how to modify them if you need to, but this takes practice. In between a plan will be your bread and butter for getting laid.

[Neskoner]

i know what your saying,but you could plan on banging her in the shower and leave in the middle of the night,but end up waking up on her parents bed with your dick in her mouth..this just shows anytime ive had a plan it works out somewhat different,it doesnt matter if youre still gettin play.2 thumbs up for any body that has had a plan that works though...

[Milton]

Because you don't understand the mechanics, the tools, you don't understand what you mean by plan.

 

I don't mean plan as in "I'm going to talk to her, then kiss her on the couch, then im going to take her to the bedroom and make out with her, and if she won't go then i'll get her in the hot tub." What I mean is "I'm going to approach her by being friendly and forthcoming, and then if she doesn't respond to that I'm going to be distant and make her come to me, then if that doesn't work I'm going to try letting her see me with other women to try to make her jealous then if that doesn't work... etc..." It's a different kind of plan...

[Carl Winslow.]

Originally posted by dkab+Dec 29 2004, 02:24 AM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (dkab - Dec 29 2004, 02:24 AM)</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteBegin-Carl Winslow.@Dec 29 2004, 06:27 PM

alot of intelligent and relavant stuff.

Quoted post

 

Just like going on the internet to learn how to graff, it's lame.

Quoted post

[/b]

 

who are you quoting? when the fuck did i say that?

[RubbeRBand]

gay!

[Guest -MOE LESTER-]

Originally posted by dpuerto@Dec 29 2004, 11:14 AM

what a bunch of fuck shit.

 

#1 Don't listen to this guy he is only trying to further set you back in your pussy career.

 

#2 There's always a girl who already wants to fuck you. Go fuck her. Infact the best way to understand women is to be with one. Get a girlfriend and you'll be able to pick her brain for everything, you will learn her inside and out. then make her break up with you. Force her to go through all lengths to try and make your life hell. Yeah, that's right, because then you will understand a female's mentality. After that you know all the warning signs, and all the right things to do. Just see a fine girl go up to her and be like I saw you from over there and I knew I had to come up to you and meet you. Introduce yourself, ask her name, do whatchu do pimpin and you if you dont move onto the next step (saying you gotta get back over there, and geting her number, then leaving for over there) then you know it wasnt meant to be. and move on to the next gurl. If you do end up engaging in conversation ask a buch of questions, try and stimulate her mind, and makeher laugh, keep it upbeat and then move on to the next step.. if it's going really good, you can ask her, "What r u doing tonight, if you dont got any plans we should do something" Beotch. that shit always works.

 

Last night I went ona group date, as in me and a group of girls. I sat between two girls and I was like i can move if this is making you too horny. Fucking whores. All girls are. He says you never know a girl. they are all sluts and so are yoU!

Quoted post

 

 

wow dude this advice only works on WHORES! if you are the type of guy that likes loose goose and used pussy im all for it. but i have homegirl that would laugh in your face with this method

 

this shits all about CONFIDENCE....you you holler at a girl like..."uhmmm...uhh....i was wondering...maybe...if we could...ya kno....go out or something"....you might as well grab your lotion and start spankin it cus you aint getting shit.....i was like this almost all of high school and i didnt get any fuckin play at all unless a girl jocked me and took control of me.....shit now i got the nothin to lose attitude its more like "yo lets go out tommorow blah blah youll have fun", and then they on the nuts

[SteveAustin]

haha...the way I remember high school...the dude that talked the most macho shit was usually full of it.

 

uncle milty has some good points.

[High Priest]

Originally posted by isor357@Dec 29 2004, 01:56 AM

The power in the relationship lies within the

partner with options. A man (some men)

are only as faithful as their options permit.

Like stated above any hoe can go out and

hook up with another man. You must

convince your woman that you are equally

capable of bagging other tail. Nobody wants

to get with somebody with no self confidence.

Simelarly, nobody wants to get with someone

that nobody else wants to get with

 

You should be careful to not sound like an ass.

let the hoe know that you perfer to kick it with

her and that so long as she keeps it real

you will reciprocate. You must convince her

that if she fucks up you will drop her.

Convince her that it's her loss.

If she acts like she doesnt give a fuck you

may have gone about this the wrong way.

You may want to drop that shit and

find something new.... She doesnt respect

you and may fuck you over. Break before

you catch feelings.

 

If you front needy for attention and stunt like

a bitch your woman is going to walk all over

you. If you display confidence you will get more

respect and in turn ass.

 

Style, a decent ride, and a clean living space

is critical.

 

Always be nice to her friends.

This is a good place to replace her.

Dont do anything too shitty

reputations are hard to shake. I speak from

experience

Quoted post

 

And make sure you call her a hoe - this right here is the most important part. Women love being called various diff. titles -hoe, whore, slut, bitch, cunt and for the more exotic "MS. Meat Wallet" - it really let's "the bitch" know where she stand's. :rolleyes: