Grandpa Posted March 15, 2005 Share Posted March 15, 2005 Check this out The 16 Year Old heres another one that i found funnier (edited 7:29 PM EST) Glasses Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 15, 2005 Share Posted March 15, 2005 I'll do the service of reposting the story: The 16 Year Old One of my roommates "hosts" perspective high school students during their visits to our school. One particular weekday, he was hosting a 16-year old guy from Summit, NJ. The kid was in our room for about 15 minutes before his cell phone rang. He picks up and the conversation goes like this: Kid: Yea? What do you want? Kid: No I don't want you to come up here. Kid: Ugh fine, the room is 209. From what I could tell, he didn't really seem thrilled that whoever he was talking to was coming up to the room. This is why to my surprise a few minutes later, a cute 16-year old girl walks into our common room. She wasn't in our room for more than 5 minutes before she asked if we had any beer. Mind you, it's 6PM on a Wednesday and we all have shit to do. Trying to be nice, we go into Tight Face's 'fridge and get some beers for all of us. The girl finished the beer, got another on her own accord, then proceeded to pour herself a cup of wine. Looking at this girl, there's no way she weighed more than 90 pounds and she wasn't more than 5'1''. After that she wanted to know if she could score any weed. Since none of us smoke, we really couldn't help her. This was probably the best idea anyway. Not for Adam. He called up one of his boys and pulled through. Before Adam sets up, Tight Face strolls into the room and tells me that the girl tried coaxing him into giving her more alcohol. He was supposedly in the bathroom shaving in the mirror when she came in asking for beer. When he told her that we were out, she started rubbing his shoulders and getting a little too close for comfort. Tight Face being the gentleman he is backed away from the girl on account of Liz (his girlfriend) and the fact that she was a wasted 16 year old. Tight Face leaves to go into the other room to shave his chest or something, and I go back to doing homework. As soon as Tight Face leaves, the girl comes into my room and starts trying to get me to give her beer. I told her she was out of luck and she pulls the same move on me that Tight Face had described minutes earlier. I get up, and tell her I have work to do and that she should go sit on the couch or something. A short while later, she ends up smoking with the perspective student and it became fair to say she was thoroughly shithoused. About half an hour later, I hear Napolean on the television in the common room and go out to watch. There are about 10 people watching the movie and the girl is in a half sleep half drunk state on the couch. The kind where your head slowly tilts back as if you were a narcoleptic, but you catch yourself right before you lose control. Well that all changed in a few minutes when she projectile vomited on our carpet. We put her up in the bathroom and had her finish her puking rally in the toilet. This girl was really fucked up and we put Tight Face in charge of taking care of her. He sat there in the bathroom making sure she continued trying to throw up and didn't lay on her back. She refused to communicate with us at all which kind of got me frustrated. I wanted to draw on her face because I'm an asshole, but no one would let me. [k3: he's not ready to play with the big boys] I settled for taking some stupid pictures of her with me and Tight Face. You can see a few below: After all was said and done, I decided to get her a cup of water from the Brita. I used one of those red beer pong plastic cups that every college student has, and I even went down to the dining hall to get her a bagel because I felt bad. We told her "host" (a girl that lives downstairs from us) that she was hooking up with the other perspective and that we didn't want to bother them. There was no way we were getting into shit for her being sick. Anyway, we left her alone in the bathroom for a little and I checked on her before I went to bed. Now this is the best part--I walk into the bathroom and I see her passed out on the floor on top of our Maxim and Stuff magazines and 2 of our towels. There's another towel draped over her body, a red plastic cup and a half eaten bagel on the floor in front of her. She looked homeless. Exactly like a bum on the street. I called in some of my roommates and we spent a few minutes throwing change into her little red cup and taking pictures. The next morning she was so hung-over it wasn't even funny. Ok, it was a little funny, but I bet she won't forget the night she made an ass out of herself in room 209. hahaha... If I was 10 years younger.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2 blaazed Posted March 15, 2005 Share Posted March 15, 2005 I WANT TO SAY SHE WOULD OF CAUGHT THE PIPE.BUT THEN AGAIN SHE WAS 16 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dick Quickwood Posted March 15, 2005 Share Posted March 15, 2005 huh Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 15, 2005 Share Posted March 15, 2005 looking back.... it wasn't really worth reposting. bah.... amatures! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DETO Posted March 15, 2005 Share Posted March 15, 2005 :lol: ..i would have hit it. deto/ :huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abracadabra Posted March 15, 2005 Share Posted March 15, 2005 i would have flushed her head in the toilet. stupid teenage drunks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gat Bush Posted March 15, 2005 Share Posted March 15, 2005 fucking skankalocious. should've farted on her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SPORTO Posted March 15, 2005 Share Posted March 15, 2005 16 is legal were I comes from, I would have a least got a few dick in mouth flicks of her little Asain ass...Faggots Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grandpa Posted March 15, 2005 Author Share Posted March 15, 2005 THERES A FEW OTHER FUNNY STORIES ON THAT SITE TOO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gatita Posted March 15, 2005 Share Posted March 15, 2005 Im so happy I didnt drink in highschool. Now at least Im of legal age and laying on someone's floor, and theres usually about 3 others next to me passed out as well. -gats /nycisfullofalcoholics Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrChupacabra Posted March 15, 2005 Share Posted March 15, 2005 i hate any and all boots that look like that. especially when the girl thinks it looks good to fucking tuck their pants into them/roll them up to showcase their ugly ass boots. get stabbed. all of you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Leader Posted March 15, 2005 Share Posted March 15, 2005 Man. That story SUCKED. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 15, 2005 Share Posted March 15, 2005 hahaha... chupa doesn't like the mucklucks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ASER1NE Posted March 16, 2005 Share Posted March 16, 2005 JAILBAIT Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CACashRefund Posted March 16, 2005 Share Posted March 16, 2005 Originally posted by MrChupacabra@Mar 15 2005, 04:50 PM i hate any and all boots that look like that. especially when the girl thinks it looks good to fucking tuck their pants into them/roll them up to showcase their ugly ass boots. get stabbed. all of you. Quoted post I hate those too, they irk me so much. Fucking old navy... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
source Posted March 16, 2005 Share Posted March 16, 2005 that was disappointing, i was expecting a better ending for a long story about a drunk girl. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InnerCityRebel Posted March 16, 2005 Share Posted March 16, 2005 i would have had all the markers out.. :clown2: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abracadabra Posted March 16, 2005 Share Posted March 16, 2005 Originally posted by MrChupacabra@Mar 16 2005, 09:50 AM i hate any and all boots that look like that. especially when the girl thinks it looks good to fucking tuck their pants into them/roll them up to showcase their ugly ass boots. get stabbed. all of you. Quoted post i've been saying this for the longest. *high fives chups* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tough Love Posted March 16, 2005 Share Posted March 16, 2005 they shouldve drawn all over her i wouldve done a piece on her face hahahahaha and then gave her a haircut or something hahah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duh-rye-won Posted March 16, 2005 Share Posted March 16, 2005 Tight Face? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Æ° Posted March 16, 2005 Share Posted March 16, 2005 the fuck man, I thought you were going to say, "I'd pipe it." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarcasm Posted March 16, 2005 Share Posted March 16, 2005 that story was not entertaining, nonethless funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tough Love Posted March 16, 2005 Share Posted March 16, 2005 i was going to say id hit it, but then i thought it might sound a bit too perverted and pedophile steez. and then, since i couldnt think of anything better to say, i just made up some random bullshit. however, considering my age, and how im not really that much older then her, id have to say id hit it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fermentor666 Posted March 16, 2005 Share Posted March 16, 2005 Welcome to college. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ka_ko_si? Posted March 16, 2005 Share Posted March 16, 2005 im sensing repressed childhood memories that have manifested themselves into binge-drinking/smoking. :love2: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.