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funny quotes from when you have been drunk...

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by fatguydist, Apr 5, 2001.

  1. fatguydist

    fatguydist Senior Member

    Joined: Dec 1, 2000 Messages: 1,552 Likes Received: 0
    post some funny random quotes that are funny to you and others might find them funny and if they dont at least you will laugh thinking about them and it will be funny...

    there is a disputer wheteher this was said drunk or not but here it is anyway...

    "two words mutual masturbation"


    "i want you inside me, you sonofabitch"

    "hello boobies"

    "you fuckin bitch"(that was me im a nice guy)

    "honestly officer considering you got me out of bed, can you explain to me how i was being dissorderly"

    "your a fuckin idiot no one wants to do body shots...(hott girls walk in) HEEEEEEEYYY who wants to do body shots"

    "fuckit im drunk"

    "it's almost one we should be getting drunk"

    "hey i wont have sex with you but we can go inside and make out... but i WILL NOT HAVE SEX WITH YOU" (guy saying that)

    "relax boys i look like durst" 95 pound guy with red cap on backwards...

    "wheres the relax juice??"

    "fuckit im drinking in the shower"

    "wheres tim?? he's downstairs passed out in the grass.... dood lets throw ice at him"

    "time to puke"

    "you arent really drunk if you dont puke at the end of the night": "i never puke(girl)", "PUSSY!"

    "is this the alacholic beer??" poopmanbob

    "im done" (takes a drink)

    fat guy dist
  2. Kamikazi

    Kamikazi Member

    Joined: Sep 28, 2000 Messages: 706 Likes Received: 0
    while smashing potato chips on some chicks knees i say: "yo ur bones are breaking" keep in mind i just meet her

    "gotta kill the spiders"

    "stop trying to fuck me !"

    "if u open ur eyes really wide ,...its like ur not drunk"

    while playing a football game i say :
    "fuck u and ur 2 cunt perversion" (i ment to say 2 point conversion)

    LORD KELI? Member

    Joined: Apr 4, 2001 Messages: 612 Likes Received: 0
  4. marmuchian

    marmuchian Senior Member

    Joined: Feb 26, 2001 Messages: 2,234 Likes Received: 0
    wow it really sounds like you guys know how to party! let me allow you to climb inside my drunken mindstate when im chillin with my cwew! herer is some of the drunken ambient rhetoric you will hear us kick in order to sound artsty fartsy and impress the ladies...

    "the shadows of a troubled figure on a dark night"

    "a troubled man stalked by criminals"

    "a dark and steamy night"

    "the melancholy reflection of a troubled mans stare in a shadowy mirror"
  5. Southern kid

    Southern kid Elite Member

    Joined: Apr 19, 2000 Messages: 3,965 Likes Received: 0
    i got one....

    "i love you tim!" hahahah that kid was drunk. http://www.12ozprophet.com/ubb//biggrin.gif'>

    i dont say that stupid of shit when i'm drunk...and i dont remember anything someone else says. wait i say stupid stuff when i'm not drunk.

    (racking paint from our friends garage)
    me - "damit i dont like red dude..."
    fatdist - "shut up..come on!"
    me - "but i dont like red!"
    fatdist - "i'll trade you!"
    me - "oh okay."

    we gave the paint back..so we're not really asses.
  6. Lazy Gringo

    Lazy Gringo New Jack

    Joined: Jul 3, 2000 Messages: 9 Likes Received: 0
    "whereus dooyouwantus to putus"... traslation: Where do you want us to put this?

    "Im not drunk"
  7. maskoner

    maskoner Member

    Joined: Nov 4, 2000 Messages: 900 Likes Received: 0
    "life's so much better when i am drunk; is that bad?"

    "no doinkers!"

    "relax boys!"

    "don't flex on my specs; don't front on my mom."

    "suck me beautiful."
  8. maskoner

    maskoner Member

    Joined: Nov 4, 2000 Messages: 900 Likes Received: 0
    shit, i'm just trying to get a head in this game...

    ... right skully?
  9. sugoione

    sugoione Senior Member

    Joined: Feb 16, 2001 Messages: 1,362 Likes Received: 0
    "fuck christian radio"

    said while i was blacked out and being recorded.. yep

    283 pig bunisher
    sugoi desu ne
    das facha
  10. sugoione

    sugoione Senior Member

    Joined: Feb 16, 2001 Messages: 1,362 Likes Received: 0
    gnes is a straight up gangster stlye frate boy and shit.. you go big man!
  11. atc

    atc Member

    Joined: Jan 5, 2001 Messages: 588 Likes Received: 0
    My roomate, after we were in a friends room and a few of us started smoking a bowl, but the guy who lived there took the bowl and said he was putting water in it: "Does the water make it burn faster or something?"

    "If I take a shot will you take a shot?"
    "If I take two shots, will you take a shot?"
    "Dammit, I can't deal with all this debating, give me a shot."

    And I'm on the outside, and I'm lookin in...

    above - teamwolf - hifiart
  12. ceilingblue

    ceilingblue Member

    Joined: Nov 30, 2000 Messages: 348 Likes Received: 0
    "hey shorty.. what's popping" me to a girl. now, you have to realize that i am neither a fan of rap music or speak in slang that often, so it's sorta funny.

    it's not a quote, but one time i was over at a friends house and about four people including myself were drinking. after about 4-5 hours of straight drinking (rum....) everybody started to get shitty. one of the kids started to pass out and looked/acted like he was going to throw up. so we decided to drag him out to the front lawn and just let me throw up there. if anything, it's was funny then. maybe not now. but then, sure thing.
  13. Face Me Face Death

    Face Me Face Death Member

    Joined: Nov 3, 2000 Messages: 536 Likes Received: 1
    one of the best things I have heard someone say while they were drunk was:
    "I was straight edge this morning, damnit now I have to get my tatoos covered"

    I hope I say funny shit like that when I sell out
  14. fatguydist

    fatguydist Senior Member

    Joined: Dec 1, 2000 Messages: 1,552 Likes Received: 0
    one night the hip hop guy (me)was hanging with the ultra metal guys i have been friends with for years and years... so we get shitty.. i puke out the front window of their tour van... then on the way into one of their houses i am walking up the stoop i stop to puke on the left and another guy on the right and we puked syncronized... that shit was sweet.. more quotes...

    i fuckin hate beer.. is there any lickher left?? fuck wheres the keg..

    margrietas kinda taste like peanuts in the aftertaste (maskoner looks at me funny)

    am i doing this right?? (good friend smoking his first cigarette) drunk and after doing the backstroke in a pool with a drink in his hand racing maskoner...

    if you want to make out with me tapp me on the sholder (me to my current girlfriend we were not together then)

    you kinda look like my 4th grade teacher (to jade dts girlfriend)she got pissed

    (ARMS ABOVE HEAD) yelling what what

    more to come
  15. ohnoone

    ohnoone Elite Member

    Joined: Jan 26, 2001 Messages: 3,060 Likes Received: 164
    "less talky, more drinky"

    "this sucks, i cant even see any giner"
    (while in key west on spring break at a wet tshirt contest.)

    wakey wakey eggs and baykey! (screamed at passed out girl)

    "Bring it on captain crunch!" (after throwing a beer bottle at this guys chest from a balconey

    and im going to macrock in harrisonburg va. this weekend, kegs cost 40 dollars. im sure ill have some more for ya.
    the graff giraffe likes this.