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christo-f

Crossfire humoUr

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[random xkcd strip]

 

 

Kinda?

 

EDIT: Also the subtext(?) should probably be included with those

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ANGELA MERKEL

Cynophobia (Fear of dogs)

Reason for fear: As a child, Chancellor Merkel was bitten by a dog, instilling her deep fear of canines. Merkel's fear is well known, and perhaps worryingly for Germans has reportedly been used against her by foreign leaders. Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin, a master of psychological diplomacy, has repeatedly attempted to take advantage of Merkel's fear. In 2006, the then-president perplexed German diplomats by presenting the chancellor with a small dog as a gift and made a habit of having his black Labrador, Koni, sit in on their meetings. Putin's successor, Dmitry Medvedev, has put a stop to the practice.

 

 

 

 

 

C302CEAC-347D-4F31-B9EF-0BC031EB57F7_mw800_mh600.jpg

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

put1.jpg

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damn, never thought i would post in Cross Fire....

 

morans-thumb.jpg

 

dude what the fuck why crop the funniest part out of this picture?

CB+morans.jpg

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A Pole walking along the road happens to spy a lamp. He picks it up, and as it is covered in rust he gives it quick rub. Out comes a genie.

 

"I'm the genie of the lamp and I can grant you three wishes," the genie says.

 

"OK," says the Pole. "I want the Chinese Army to invade Poland." Odd choice, the genie thinks, but nevertheless he grants the wish, and the Chinese Army comes all the way from China, invades, and goes back home.

 

"Right, second wish. Maybe something more positive," says the genie.

 

"No," replies the Pole, "I want the Chinese Army to invade again." So the Chinese come all the way from China, lay waste to more of Poland, and then go home.

 

"Listen," says the genie. "You have one last wish. I can make Poland the most beautiful and prosperous place on earth."

 

"If you don't mind, I want the Chinese army to invade one more time." So the Chinese army comes again, destroys what's left of Poland, and then goes home for the last time.

 

"I don't understand," says the genie. "Why did you want the Chinese army to invade Poland three times?"

 

"Well," replies the Pole, "they had to go through Russia six times."

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