FACTORY_MADE Posted January 24, 2010 Share Posted January 24, 2010 i sold health insurance until recently. on average, a normal person goes to the hospital ONCE every 7 years for something bad (broken bones, stitches, dog bites, bee stings, etc) the guy who created pre paid legal knew this. he was an insurance agent and sold all lines of insurance through his brokerage. he also knew that he had run ins with the law more frequently than his ER room visits. he actually got into a bad car accident once, and killed some people. they slapped him with Involuntary Manslaughter charges. dude had to pay ass loads of court fees and lawyer fees, spent some time in jail. after all was said and done he asks himself, "If i have car insurance, health insurance, home owners insurance, life insurance, dental and vision insurance, supplemental insurance.... WHY THE HELL ISN'T THERE A LEGAL INSURANCE??" so pre paid legal was born. the benefits are pretty good if you're a shady individual like myself, and for normal people too: - got a speeding ticket? send it to them. they'll get it dropped. main reason i got this service. i usually get $500 in tickets yearly for different shit. now i spend $300 yearly ($26 a month) and don't worry about haters. - starting a business? get the lawyers to review and explain in lamens terms wtf you're reading - hassled by a debt collector? tell the lawyer to write them a letter demanding written proof that I owed them money (most shit will get dropped from your credit report because original documentation has been lost when the account switched debt collectors) - landlord problems? this helped me recently. the cunts. - child support? you'll need this if you got little chud lookin kids and a pissed off baby mama. - treated unfairly or taken advantage of? pretty general, but it gives you the power to say "BITCH I'LL SUE YOU!" and mean it... good for emotional bitches in parking lots at walmart. - getting sued? yes, they help there too. - IRS fucking you over in an audit? these guys will help. - will preparation comes with the service for both husband and wife ($500 value if you've ever looked into creating a living will) - trial defense benefits - including pre-trial time. 60 hours trial time per year for the first year, 120 second yr, 240 third yr, etc. THE ONLY EXCLUSION I DO NOT AGREE WITH: This does not cover defense claims relating to drugs, alcohol, substance abuse, chemical abuse, dependency, or the use of any other medicines. BUT IT WILL COVER GRAFFITI RELATED CRIME! So take what you want from it. For $26 a month I feel like I stand a better chance of NOT going to federal pound you in the butt prison. OH and this wasn't a sales pitch. Getcho life right nig nogs. This is cheaper than having a lawyer on retainer. more info on where to inquire for these services? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redeyedanimal Posted January 25, 2010 Share Posted January 25, 2010 i just typed prepaid legal into google and got a shitload of results. prepaidlegal.com was one, haha. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miley Cyrus Posted January 27, 2010 Share Posted January 27, 2010 i have my first job interview today, its at a pizza shop any tips and/or advice? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MedicineCabinet Posted January 27, 2010 Share Posted January 27, 2010 dress like this Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abcs Posted January 27, 2010 Share Posted January 27, 2010 dont carry a credit card balance if you can help it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fat ralphy Posted January 27, 2010 Share Posted January 27, 2010 i have my first job interview today, its at a pizza shop any tips and/or advice? Just show up on time... Anyone can get a job at a pizza shop... <worked@6pizzaspotsoner Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KARD like WOE Posted January 27, 2010 Share Posted January 27, 2010 dont carry a credit card... to a strip club 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fat ralphy Posted January 27, 2010 Share Posted January 27, 2010 Heres one...dont go to strip clubs. Get some gear and pull some broads... In the real world $ = girls will secs u In the strip club $ = blue balls Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MedicineCabinet Posted January 27, 2010 Share Posted January 27, 2010 avoid eating a mountain of taco bell for lunch unless you like volcano shits Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rice eyes Posted January 27, 2010 Share Posted January 27, 2010 Volcano shits can be a great way to get revenge Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SwampFightOner Posted January 27, 2010 Share Posted January 27, 2010 I ate quite a bit of Taco Bell last night after the bar, and took quite possibly the biggest shit of my life when I woke up Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MedicineCabinet Posted January 27, 2010 Share Posted January 27, 2010 acknowledged, i also ripped huge spurts of shitfarts with lots of bass after todays lunch rice eyes, long time no post dood Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fat ralphy Posted January 28, 2010 Share Posted January 28, 2010 I ate quite a bit of Taco Bell last night after the bar, and took quite possibly the biggest shit of my life when I woke up its 11:59pm...i just ate a chicken quesadilla, 3 taco supremes and a volcano burrito im hoping i dont have the same results Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FACTORY_MADE Posted January 28, 2010 Share Posted January 28, 2010 When in the city and drinking outdoors phone booths are great places to down a few swigs without bieng seen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FACTORY_MADE Posted January 28, 2010 Share Posted January 28, 2010 For those of you in the new york city area im going to teach you a great trick for evading your fare :-D If you have an unlimited you can swipe yourself or another friend in then afterwards go to the booth and tell the clerk that you were told by the turnstyle to swipe again but after doing so it told you that the metrocard had just been used, otherwiords it ate your fare. The clerk will ask you to swipe your card in the reader, see that the last time of use was a few minutes ago validating your story and proceed to let you through. ive saved hundreds of dollars in fare this way and it impresses girls too ! :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FACTORY_MADE Posted January 28, 2010 Share Posted January 28, 2010 if you catch a tag with chalk its technically not graffiti as the surface isnt actually damaged Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FACTORY_MADE Posted January 28, 2010 Share Posted January 28, 2010 keeping your hands/paint in your armpits and balls is a great way to keep them warm when its too cold. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FACTORY_MADE Posted January 28, 2010 Share Posted January 28, 2010 When you're in class, sit next to a girl and start to draw. Shell probably notice and want to lick your balls Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FACTORY_MADE Posted January 28, 2010 Share Posted January 28, 2010 you dont have to fry everything!!! broiling food is a great way to experiment with marinades and seasonings, is much less fattening, and is good for your colon! :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FACTORY_MADE Posted January 28, 2010 Share Posted January 28, 2010 And lastly i will bestow upon you the secret to a longer life. It is having a healthy colon. that is all Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edward Orenthal Norton Posted January 28, 2010 Share Posted January 28, 2010 if your in a situation where your paint can freeze get some the little heating gel packs from walmart. like 3 or 4 depending on how many cans you have. break them up so they heat up and through them in your bag. no frozen confetti paint. no worries. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hvak19 Posted January 28, 2010 Share Posted January 28, 2010 if you are without a belt (possibly in jail) pull the button so it hangs on to the closest belt loop to the left Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
publicenemyno.3 Posted January 28, 2010 Share Posted January 28, 2010 When you're in class, sit next to a girl and start to draw. Shell probably notice and want to lick your balls this is true. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bentone Posted January 28, 2010 Share Posted January 28, 2010 ^^^ yes it is. especially if you are good. obviously if you are drwing stickfigures she will probably think you are a retard. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zebradrips Posted January 28, 2010 Share Posted January 28, 2010 For those of you in the new york city area im going to teach you a great trick for evading your fare :-D If you have an unlimited you can swipe yourself or another friend in then afterwards go to the booth and tell the clerk that you were told by the turnstyle to swipe again but after doing so it told you that the metrocard had just been used, otherwiords it ate your fare. The clerk will ask you to swipe your card in the reader, see that the last time of use was a few minutes ago validating your story and proceed to let you through. ive saved hundreds of dollars in fare this way and it impresses girls too ! :) this actually happened to me and they told me i had to wait 15 minutes to use it again. public employees are generally useless. :mad: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zebradrips Posted January 28, 2010 Share Posted January 28, 2010 also...to actually contribute to the thread...everything on this site. http://lifehacker.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Siege1222 Posted January 29, 2010 Share Posted January 29, 2010 Self check out at the grocery store ... pay for 2 things and walk out with 10 ... read between the lines Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FACTORY_MADE Posted January 29, 2010 Share Posted January 29, 2010 that shit might work in bumblefuck but for the most part in the city thats loss prevention favorite way to bag niggas Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FACTORY_MADE Posted January 29, 2010 Share Posted January 29, 2010 this actually happened to me and they told me i had to wait 15 minutes to use it again. public employees are generally useless. :mad: you shouldve niggered out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OarsoneSBOS Posted February 5, 2010 Share Posted February 5, 2010 Dont half ass anything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.