fat ralphy Posted December 1, 2011 Share Posted December 1, 2011 i also agree that folks are most likely born this way/nogaga as i kid my intake of sugar was fucking ridiculous, i used to hit the medicine cabinet, i would huff shit in the garage, steal a 6 pack of rootbeer and pound them all on the sideyard. Looking back I think that I had signs of addiction. Like OMG said all or nothing, with graf, with drugs and drinking etc. Not trying to power post here, but last night my lady brought up how I go at everything all or nothing. Videogames, AA, foods i eat, 12oz....nothing in my life do I approach with moderation. Its hard for her to relate to my extreme levels. Kind of sucks that she has to spend her life with a dude who cant really go to parties or hangout with folks getting shitty. I can tolerate the bar for a few hours on account of someones birthday etc...but just how our drinking affected others so does our sobriety. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chunturo Posted December 1, 2011 Share Posted December 1, 2011 Alcohol recently gave me a big problem yet allowed me to realize my problems could be much, much greater. I absolutely have to take my current situation as my one and only chance to: stay out of jail, keep my job, provide for wife and two kids. Perspective is a MF, but damn I'm getting it as a lucky break, despite the shit I'm in. Alcohol is just as much a real deal as any other substance... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
injury Posted December 2, 2011 Share Posted December 2, 2011 Perspective is a motherfucker. And a strong one. That's really been the biggest takeaway from AA so far for me, is that i realize how lucky i am/how much worse off i could be. Hearing from people who've been through much more than me yet think the same way as i do ... tells me to sack up and not ever turn to stuff like this to deal with my relatively insignificant problems. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redeyedanimal Posted December 2, 2011 Share Posted December 2, 2011 ^this. Still haven't been to a meeting yet in the new city, but I have removed liquor from my house, and only have beer. I know, I know, substitutions are bad excuses, and I'm sure before long I'll have another fifth of tequila in my cabinet, for a day or two and then it'll be gone again. Health problems from drinking/oner. And still drinking/twoer. Needsmedicalweed/threeism. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fat ralphy Posted December 2, 2011 Share Posted December 2, 2011 i just got back from a meeting.... only 4 people there, its at a homeless shelter and my buddy is the secretary, so i go to support his meeting. anyway, the kid i fired as my sponsee was there, it was good to see him....he still hasn't had a drink. which was good to hear, it was nice to be cool with him and let him know i am still supportive etc. there was a dude there who had been sober off and on for 26 years. basically said the times he relapsed were because of problems with females (and getting too comfortable in his sobriety). he told us that after having some real time, going back out and drinking, it feels different and it is harder to come back into the program. something i need to hear, i get the feeling once in awhile that "i can drink again...its been 4 years, I can control it now" etc. anyway. just bullshitting..... take it easy folks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
injury Posted December 2, 2011 Share Posted December 2, 2011 Something else i realized last night: I thought, when i started this whole process, that i used alcohol solely to deal with my problems. Loneliness, depression, girl problems, et cetera. Well, I had a decent week for the first time in awhile. Actually, it was a great week. I'm in the process for searching for a permanent job and i got a lead into an advertising job that may lead to something really good for me and getting a real start on my life. Anyways, I hang up the phone with someone related to this job Wednesday night and i'm elated. never been this happy about a job, ever. I wanted to celebrate and thought ... i need a beer! or 6! i'ma go out to the bar and get drunk as fuck! good job INJ, time to celebrate. That was kinda alarming and pretty telling (to me at least). Weird to me that i wanted to celebrate with something that, for the past 6 months or so, was something that i turned to only in harder times. Alcohol for celebration and for consolation. Even though on paper this makes no sense, i'm still dying for a beer now ... 2 days later. I went to the meeting last night and it helped a little bit but I think whats keeping me sober instead is the knowledge that i'll be ashamed of myself if i crack when things are starting to get better. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IRON CHEF Posted December 2, 2011 Share Posted December 2, 2011 injury: CONGRATS ON THE JOB, THE PERFECT THING TO DIVE 100% OF YOUR "ENERGY" AND THINKING INTO, AND BEFORE YOU KNOW IT, YOU'LL "ACCIDENTALLY' GET RAISES AND PROMOTIONS YOU'LL BE SO GOOD AT IT. ALSO, YES WE ARE TRIGGERED TO WANT TO DRINK DURING DOWNS AND UPS. PEACE- 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fat ralphy Posted December 2, 2011 Share Posted December 2, 2011 thats an awesome GIF Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
triplesm Posted December 3, 2011 Share Posted December 3, 2011 Thanks, my main issue with stopping right now is if I do I feel like the beer beat me, all i want is to be normal again, Friday night right now and I'm at home with my dog drinking watching tv, that's not normal for someone my age. I need a fucking change... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IRON CHEF Posted December 3, 2011 Share Posted December 3, 2011 Thanks, my main issue with stopping right now is if I do I feel like the beer beat me, all i want is to be normal again, Friday night right now and I'm at home with my dog drinking watching tv, that's not normal for someone my age. I need a fucking change... THE BEER ONLY BEATS US WHEN WE USE IT AND FAIL, IT'S LIKE TURNING YOUR STATEMENT AROUND AND SAYING , "IF I KEEP DRINKING I FEEL LIKE I BEAT THE BEER" NOT TOO MUCH SENSE THERE DUE TO WHAT WE DO WHEN DRUNK, RIGHT? THE BEER BEAT US EVERY TIME WE DRANK IT I'D SAY. LET'S JUST SAY WITH ALL OF OUR PROBLEMS WITH ALCOHOL WE DON'T CATEGORIZE BY AGE, I MEAN NONE OF US SHOULD BE DRINKING ANYTIME, AT ANY AGE IF WE HAVE REALLY FELT THAT DRINKING IS SOMETHING WE CANNOT CONTROL. IN OTHER WORDS WE SHOULDN'T SAY/THINK THAT WHEN WE AS ALCOHOLICS GET TO A CERTAIN AGE, THAT DRINKING ALONE WITH THE DOG/TV IS "NORMAL". LOTS OF SOLID POSTS IN THIS THREAD TO READ RATHER THAN DRINKING YOUR NIGHT AWAY WITH THE DOG BRO, I MEAN IT AIN'T LIKE YOUR "OUT WITH THE HOMIES" AND CAN USE THAT EXCUSE DUE TO THE PEER PRESSURE. ONE OF THE BIGGEST AGREEMENTS IN THIS THREAD IS THAT GETTING SOME GOOD EXERCISE REALLY CHASES THE DEMONS/STRESS/DEPRESSION AWAY,,, YOU GETTING ANY EXERCISE? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manute Bol Posted December 3, 2011 Share Posted December 3, 2011 This is what helps me so far: Explore some abandoned buildings Do push ups randomly all the time in the middle of watching TV on the couch like a slob Walk places Climb shit Hang out with friends and don't be a pussy about not drinking Go to a bar and order a soda water like a pussy but don't act like one about it Try having sex more often Jog Ghost box Keep a work out schedule and try maxing out the most weight you can every week, watch them numbers go up If you are lucky enough to have a heavy bag or find one, use it, often Commit to drawing/painting/pissing huge projects to keep your mind off drinking when you're bored Try having more sex, and trying to put it in her butt, relentlessly, for lolz Go to a show sober, see what it's like, you wont end up on the floor as often Do a bunch of shit sober that you have never done before Work more hours, save more money, buy cooler shit uhhh, ok I'm done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fat ralphy Posted December 3, 2011 Share Posted December 3, 2011 damn dude, thats the shit im talkin about^^^^ its like a whole new world opens up when we dont let the drink be our major concern Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tenyearsdrunk Posted December 4, 2011 Share Posted December 4, 2011 thank you all contributors for the honesty on dealing with alchoholism. i struggle every day to not drink, but im an asshole if i dont and i have been drinking for twenty years. i regret every stupid thing i have done. as i said i stay inner city. so i generally watch for shit and dirty needles before i take a step...but i tried the twelve and i dont have the energy to donate for having an attention span and giving a fuck. so i dont go cause i cant give back. seriously......i would be a heroin addict. easy. but i grew up next to war. so i know that the chances i have for jobs and education and making a diference in the world are more than the rest. that being said. im chemically imbalanced in the brain. its not a lot of fun. watch the real worlds news? al jazeera bbc? i give a fuck. but all the posts here helped me alot. thank you very much. stay up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IRON CHEF Posted December 4, 2011 Share Posted December 4, 2011 but i tried the twelve and i dont have the energy to donate for having an attention span and giving a fuck. so i dont go cause i cant give back. FOR YOUR OWN GOOD, I'M CALLING BULLSHIT ON THIS ONE, HOW MANY TIMES DID YOU ACTUALLY GO, TO SO QUICKLY GIVE UP? I'LL ADMIT THE 1st THRU 5th TIMES I WENT I WAS THE SAME WAY, "KEEP COMING BACK" TELL ME WHAT THAT QUOTE IS FROM AND I'LL BELIEVE YOU'VE ACTUALLY WENT MORE THAN 1 TIME, AND QUITE POSSIBLY TO MORE THAN 1 MEETING LOCATION, WE ALL IN HERE KNOW DIFFERENT MEETINGS HAVE WAY DIFFERENT VIBES. FISH AROUND FOR YOUR COMFORT ZONE AND DON'T GIVE UP. YOU'RE NOT GOING TO SPILL-OUT YOUR WHOLE STORY IN YOUR FIRST MEETING, MOST OF US ARE VERY STRICT ON OURSELVES AND MIGHT EXPECT TO DO THAT, THEN WHEN WE DON'T WE FEEL LIKE WE'VE FAILED SOMEHOW? RELAX, SIT BACK, LISTEN, AND IT WILL ALL FALL INTO PLACE BEFORE YOU KNOW IT. PEACE- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
half n half Posted December 5, 2011 Share Posted December 5, 2011 Dad just died last night , gf bitchin at me all day cheers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fat ralphy Posted December 5, 2011 Share Posted December 5, 2011 damn half, sorry to hear that man.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IRON CHEF Posted December 5, 2011 Share Posted December 5, 2011 Dad just died last night , gf bitchin at me all day cheers. MAY YOUR FATHER REST IN PEACE. WHY WITH YOUR FAMILY LOSS WOULD YOUR GF BE MESSIN WITH YOU? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PITOFZOMBIES Posted December 6, 2011 Share Posted December 6, 2011 Still going strong, fellas... been busy as hell with work and trying to avoid stagnation... I.E. sitting on the internets. hope you're all doing well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toiletseat Posted December 6, 2011 Share Posted December 6, 2011 MAY YOUR FATHER REST IN PEACE. WHY WITH YOUR FAMILY LOSS WOULD YOUR GF BE MESSIN WITH YOU? there are very few reasons for wifebeating, this however is one of em Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
injury Posted December 7, 2011 Share Posted December 7, 2011 Dad just died last night , gf bitchin at me all day cheers. Rest in peace to your father man. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FREIGHTYONE Posted December 7, 2011 Share Posted December 7, 2011 A week sober today. REALLY want to go out for a "few" drinks right now, but not going to. I was cool all week, but since I have the day off tomorrow, my mind is trained to go out and get loaded tonight. Probably the best week I've had in five months or so, hate to ruin it with bar tabs, hangovers and regrets. Actually, fuck that, it WAS the best week I've had in five months. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fat ralphy Posted December 7, 2011 Share Posted December 7, 2011 word man, let that goodness snowball into some more good things brother^^^ my brother called me last night, said he is really fed up with shit. most of the family cut him off..... he is going to give sobriety another go.....hopefully he can see the light when things get rough. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
injury Posted December 7, 2011 Share Posted December 7, 2011 A week sober today. REALLY want to go out for a "few" drinks right now, but not going to. I was cool all week, but since I have the day off tomorrow, my mind is trained to go out and get loaded tonight. Probably the best week I've had in five months or so, hate to ruin it with bar tabs, hangovers and regrets. Actually, fuck that, it WAS the best week I've had in five months. I felt the exact same way myself after my first week. It's a good feeling. And it only goes away if you let it/it'll wear away slowly like everything else but for now even for me it's still pretty fresh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
george jetson Posted December 7, 2011 Share Posted December 7, 2011 Dad just died last night , gf bitchin at me all day cheers. we all know that gf's bitch almost daily. but on a day (should be more like a few weeks) like one involving the passing of a close family member is unacceptable in my book. drop that bitch immediately. remember she's your gf, not your wife. you can end it with a phonecall. just my opinion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PITOFZOMBIES Posted December 7, 2011 Share Posted December 7, 2011 ok, finally had enough time to sit down and read through all the posts since work has gotten bombarded. first off, Sorry for your loss, Half... -- stoked to see more folks coming out of the woodwork and addressing their issues. this shit is a wild road for sure, and support is key to ending up on the right one. i got all you motherfuckers. corny or not, this place played a large role in getting me up off my ass. just being able to vent was clutch, and it helped keep me from a dive into a darker mental spot by merely giving me something to do with myself. I know i've mentioned how great things have been going in my life more than once, but i cannot stress it enough. since i quit drinking, my role at work has become vital to both myself and the company. i'm truly valued and compensated accordingly. between road trips with my co-workers/friends to both Seattle and SF, including all of our meals and other expenses covered, and just the sheer elation i wake with every day, it's hard to imagine ever wanting anything else. been seeing a rad chick on the casual dating tip. she's good friends with my boss and we all kick it on the regular. she's hella supportive in every sense of the word, as are my boss and coworkers and other friends. it's ill as fuck having people you respect and love tell you how fucking proud they are. Next week i'm flying down to my hometown to swoop my car that has been in storage since May. i never thought i'd ever be able to do that, and i probably wouldn't have the way things were before. it's fucking rad. i feel like a fucking human for the first time in a long time. i guess you could chalk this up to coincidence, if you were so inclined, but it's fairly obvious to me that the common denominator to my quality of life was alcohol. more alcohol -> more misery... more sobriety -> more motherfucking happiness, to put it lightly. as far as the meetings and all that, i still haven't been back since i made that post. honestly, i feel more at ease without it. i had more urges to drink and just doubts in general when i was attending regularly. i DO feel guilty that some of them might be worried that i'm relapsing tough, but that is not the case. fact of the matter is, between working all the time, the trips, and staying with the girl, i don't have any desire to go. that shit is generally not for me. i've always been vastly different from just about everyone, and that's proven true for the meetings. i needed to step back and evaluate what the program is all about. it definitely has a lot of benefits, and it set me on this path, so i recommend that anyone struggling with this shit go to some meetings. but don't lose yourself in the process. well, god fucking knows i wouldn't be in this girl's bed with the keys to her apartment, about to go get this mop cut, and then head to my badass fucking job if i were still drinking. sobriety is fucking worth it to me... hope you're all well. thanks to all of you for the support and shit you show everyone, including myself. support is key. keep on keeping on. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fat ralphy Posted December 7, 2011 Share Posted December 7, 2011 i needed to step back and evaluate what the program is all about. it definitely has a lot of benefits, and it set me on this path, so i recommend that anyone struggling with this shit go to some meetings. but don't lose yourself in the process This. Really fucking clutch, I have a buddy who says we go to meetings to live a better life outside of these rooms.....yet there are so many who live their lives in them. To me its fucked up to see people who make AA their world. Glad to hear you are feeling good POZ. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tenyearsdrunk Posted December 10, 2011 Share Posted December 10, 2011 Half n Half... dealing with the loss of your Father is with out a doubt one of the hardest milestones in life. God Bless You and Your Family. IRON CHEF- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tenyearsdrunk Posted December 10, 2011 Share Posted December 10, 2011 Half n Half... dealing with the loss of your Father is with out a doubt one of the hardest milestones in life. God Bless You and Your Family. IRON CHEF- thanks for calling bullshit...but heres why meetings dont work for me. im socially crippled in certain environments....i work well in some but not in others. if i wasnt drinking i prefer subway tunnels and freight yards and decaying urban places in general. this is good. the last meeting i went to was AWESOME AS FUCKING HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it was boys night out in a parking garage all men and the dude in charge or whatev had a pentagram 666 and horns tatted on his school. the old school classic car driving doc wearing dickies and suspenders was making jokes about havin to suck his dick AFTER you had do pushups till you couldnt if you were new to the group, got a six in blade pulled on him by some old school lookin HA dude. all in all awesome. went with a old friend. BUT>................... i couldnt smoke weed around a bunch of cigs and i dont smoke unless i drink...everyone one was eating junk food and drinking coffee and drinking soda....i dont. it was cool....found a couple dope sponsors...dude i met works at a death penalty prison doing appeals.... why it didnt work? i tried to go to a meeting the next night...i had to take the bus...which i hate doing unless im buzzed....then walk and i couldnt find it and all in all.......... this was the 5th or 6th time over 5 citys ive tried. i have the upmost respect for people that can solve this problem with meetings and wished it worked for me. in perspective....i dont do drugs, eat junk food, excercise alot and hustle legit. im just a alchoholic trynna stay out of prison and live a legit life. to be honest? come on now...im way past my earlobes in two decades of cancer exposure chemical shit (smoking since i was 12) was a house painter for seven years and my bodys wrecked in my mid 30s. couldnt walk all summer and walking and drinking is my drug of choice. plus im italian irish. alchoholism is a national pastime and normal there. fuck america for making it all fucked up for alchoholics... illegal wars...drug wars..war on crime...high incarceration rates. theres a reason i drink. but i can function and i dont give a fuck if i destroy my body two decades early. as long as i dont drive and dont fight. worst i do is act loud and write on shit. so thats why i dont go to meetings. but i like drinking more than i like humans as a species. i prefer homies and lovers and pitts. just me. and ive made progress the last year on finding that balance...but i got a WAYYYYYYY to go. one love! happy holidays. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
asthma al Posted December 10, 2011 Share Posted December 10, 2011 http://m.youtube.com/index?desktop_uri=%2F&gl=US#/watch?v=S2uNMDaRok4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mackfatsoe Posted December 10, 2011 Share Posted December 10, 2011 over the last two weeks I pretty much cut my use in half, which doesn't sound like much but feels like a big deal to me. I wake up feeling much better (most days), but until I get that first high of the day I get these horrible like full body aches, like full body restless leg syndrome, plus just feeling totally drained, no energy, shitty. also lots of days when im sober I will just get real naseous all of a sudden and vomit whatever is in my stomach, then I'm fine. I've been smoking more weed and drinking more too...which is retarded I know, but I really needed to dry out from the pills 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.