Dontemptme Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 NOW RIGHT TUMBLEWEED SMOKING I AM..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shameless self promotion Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Upgrade your stash son. You'll be sleeping in 30 mins. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
THEMELGIBSON Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Just some ways you can show your special someone you're a real man: 1. When she asks how she looks, shrug and say "could be better." This will keep her on her toes, and girls love that. 2. Never hold her hand. This can be interpreted as a sign of weakness. If she grabs your hand, squeeze hers really, really hard until she cries. This will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are. 3. Once a month sneak up on her from behind and knock her over. Girls are like dogs. They love to be roughed up. 4. Call her in the middle of the night to ask if she's sleeping. When she says that she is, say "you better be." Repeat this 4 or 5 times until morning. This will show her you care. 5. When she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might be her fault. This will pave the way for her own personal improvement, and every girl needs some improvement. 6. If, I mean when, she's mad at you for not calling her when you say you will, promise her that you will call her at a certain time later in the day. This will ensure that she waits by the phone. Also, tell her when you call you're going to tell her a special surprise. Now she'll be really excited. Now don't call. That's also quite funny! 7. If you're talking to another girl, make sure she's looking. When your g/f looks at you, stare into her eyes, mouth the words 'fuck you,' and grab the other girl's ass. Girls love competition. 8. Tell her you're taking her out to dinner. Drive for miles so she thinks it's going to be really special. Then take her to a burning tire yard. When she starts to get upset tell her you were just kidding and now you're really going to take her to dinner. Then drive her home. When she starts crying and asks why you would do something like that lean over and whisper very quietly into her ear "...because I can...now go make a sandwich" 9. Introduce her to your friends as "some chick". Women love those special nicknames. 10. Play with her hair. Play with it HARD. 11. Warm her up when she's cold... but not by giving her your jacket, because then you might get cold. Rather, look her in the eye and say, "If you don't stop bitching about the cold right now, you're going to be bitching about a black eye." The best way to get warm is with fear. 12. Take her to a party. When you get there she'll have to go to the bathroom (they always do). Leave immediately. Come back right when the party's dying and yell at her the whole way home for ditching you at the party. 13. Make her laugh. A good way to do this is if she has a small pet. Kick the pet. I always find stuff like that funny. Why shouldn't girls? 14. Let her fall asleep in your arms. When she's fast asleep, wait 10 minutes then JUMP UP AND SCREAM IN HER EAR! Repeat until she goes home and you can use your arms for more important things. Like basketball. 15. Spit often. I hear girls like guys that spit. 16. If you care about her, never ever tell her. This will only give her self confidence. Then you can never turn her into the object she deep down desires to be. 17. Every time you're in her house steal one of the following: shoes, earrings, or anything else that comes in pairs. Only take one of the pair. This way she'll go crazy. 18. Take her out to dinner. Right when she's about to order interrupt and say "No, she's not hungry". Make her watch you eat. Girls love a guy that speaks for her. 19. Look her in the eyes and smile. Then clock her one. Girls love a spontaneous guy. 20. Give her one of your t-shirts... and make sure it has your smell on it. But not a sexy cologne smell. A bad smell. You know what I'm talking about. 21. If you're listening to music, and she asks to hear it, tell her no. This way she'll think you're mysterious. 22. Remember her birthday, but don't get her anything. Teach her material objects aren't important. The only thing that's important is that she keeps you happy. And your happiness is the greatest present she can ever get. 23. Recognize the small things; they usually mean the most. Then when she's sleeping, steal all her small things and break them. Because jewelry is for wussies and Asian ladies. 24. When she gives you a present on your birthday, Christmas, or just whenever, take it and tell her you love it. Then next time you know she's coming over on a trash day leave the trash can open and have the present visibly sticking out of the can. Girls actually don't like this one that much, but I think it's funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toluene_causes_tumors Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr.Obtuse Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+plus+ Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+plus+ Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+plus+ Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YearzOne Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Will Ferreal Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CALIgula Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 okay so who is watching friends tonight? i know i am. a lot of people dont admit watching this show because its corny and just really dumb. but i've always been a fan. whats funny is that something would come up in my daily life and i would make a comment about friends or something and ALWAYS it seems that someone knows what i am talking about. i'm a nerd. this spam is clever...two 1-letter links for androids.:lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Will Ferreal Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YearzOne Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Will Ferreal Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cro. Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 no luck required...i aint bitchmade homie. i got freakish strenth.android phones 1 punch ko's on deck. when i lay down at night, i pray to the bsm gods that someone will start some shit so i can knock android tablets them into next tuesday. my middle knuckle looks like mt fiji mufucka. catch one of those to the temple and its lights out this made me laugh 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i'moffthywallz Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Will Ferreal Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigdoughnut69 Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drue_Down Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 My pool is 102 degrees, and i still got goose bumps. Dry heat FTW! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Creampuff Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 i have swamp ass Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigdoughnut69 Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 My pool is 102 degrees, and i still got goose bumps. Dry heat FTW! I don't miss those summers in the valley at all. And should stay hot till the last week of October. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brickos Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Bling Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigdoughnut69 Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Bling Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blahh Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 propped THEMELGIBSON. didn't do anything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blahh Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brickos Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Minute mark Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
injury Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr.Obtuse Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 gffgfgdgffdgfdgfgdgfdg Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boxcarrapist Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metronome Posted August 26, 2011 Share Posted August 26, 2011 i have swamp ass Swass, swenis, and swalls. Working outside in hot weather. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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