Anyone have friends in Narc Anon?

This shit bothers the hell out of me. My friend went in for shrooms, nitrous, weed, acid, and x, all after he landed on his head BMXing high without a helmit. He gave up his only sport, BMXing, and checked himself into NA.

He's been 284 days clean but now feels more comitted to NA than when he checked himself in. At the Junior College he goes to, he only hangs out with kids from NA, the fifty someodd friends from highschool that go to this college he avoids. When he told me he's always looking for new meetings to go to all over the area, I asked him why he likes it so much. He said he couldnt tell me because they have secret rituals that I wouldn't understand. He said he's be happy to take me to one of the meetings, but couldnt discuss with me what they do there.

Anyone have friends in NA? Has anyone gone and knows what the fuck my friend is talking about?? Is my friend gonna need rehab after this rehab?

It bothers you that your friend made a commitment to sobriety and is following through with it. You should be happy for him.

Did it occur to you that he might like hanging with his NA friends because they dont try to peer pressure him back into his old habits?

Very cool people in NA and AA and such. Seriously.

give him some c0ke. then he'll open up.

sounds like his life went from awesome to boring super quick

good for him!

I have a bunch of AA friends. You have to drop your old friends when you begin. God, if one of my girls stayed being my friend and hanging out I doubt she'd still be sober. He'll knock out of it soon and probably chill again. People just have to take some time to build up a strong willpower is all.

i seen that south park where stans dad goes to AA....

fucking priceless. :haha: :haha: :haha: so true to life too.

Originally posted by beardofzeus@Feb 15 2006, 11:53 PM

It bothers you that your friend made a commitment to sobriety and is following through with it. You should be happy for him.

Did it occur to you that he might like hanging with his NA friends because they dont try to peer pressure him back into his old habits?

Quoted post

Originally posted by beardofzeus@Feb 16 2006, 04:53 AM

It bothers you that your friend made a commitment to sobriety and is following through with it.  You should be happy for him.

Did it occur to you that he might like hanging with his NA friends because they dont try to peer pressure him back into his old habits?

Quoted post

Before there was two things you could talk to him about, BMX and drugs. Now all you can talk to him about is rehab. The kid's depressed, opens every discussion with his sobriety day count, calls everyone "brother", antisocial... NA just seems like the new goth.

I wanted to add that I love this kid, I've known him since fourth grade (he smoked back then too) and I wouldnt be asking about this if I didn't want to make sure what he's doing is healthy.

Everyone I know that went to NA and AA became way better persons because of it.

But yeah, if you dont change and dont think about personal developement and progress, it will seem weird to you that people get sucked into it.

Just like it seems weird to normal people when you get sucked into drugs.

Be happy for your friend.

NA and AA are usually just as life-changing for people as their drug habit was

getting out of bad addiction problems usually requires a major transformation that can almost seem like a brainwash at times

but it is a very positive support system for people who need to change

change is good, but it seems scary sometimes.

no matter what it's for the best if it helps them stay clean

good for your friend......its a hard thing to go through

my bro has been clean for like almost 2 years now from crack/weed /alcohol and whatever else was out there and he is totally different from before but it is in a totally good way.

NA/AA is like a cult and they basically have to brainwash you so you get better but its for the good of themselves and the ones around them. Hey if thats what he has to do to stay clean then I am going to support him all the way

About 3.5 years ago i kicked a pretty ugly heroin habit... i went to detox for 3 days... when i left they really encouraged me too go to meetings... so i tried it cuz i was pretty much lost and out of ideas... it sucked to go at first cuz its fuckin embarassing and uncomfortable to walk into a room full of strangers... but most of the people there were really cool... they tell you to leave your "using" friends behind for your own good and all that shit... i started goin to 1 meeting a day for a while... had a sponsor and all that shit.. i learned a lot about myself and about how not to be a fuckin junkie... theres things you learn there that apply to everyday life.. i still quote my old sponsor on occasion cuz he dropped some fuckin gems on me... after about a year i realized that i wanted more... to me people at meetings are so preocupied (sp?) with not gettin high, they forget how to live.. but thats just my truth, doesnt work for everyone... so i stopped goin... i now drink on the weekends do the occasional bowl (shit they said i wouldnt handle w/o goin back to the dirty)... i work 60 hrs a week.. and work on side projects w my free time.. i have a full and good life... good friends (same ones ive had my whole life) and family (some who get fucked up & i still manage) no time for meetings or heroin...

i've seen people there for weed and really into the program and shit.. fucked up but it prolly isnt the drug addiction that keeps them there... its the sense of belonging to someone whos prolly pretty lonely...

the thing is, people go to NA/AA for all different reasons.. some need a break from the bs... some need a family.. some need a reason to live... some want some pussy/dick... or just warm cup of coffee...

for me it was a step in the right direction and a place to learn some ish and move on... for some its a way of life...

either way dont hate on your friend for his involvement.. try to be supportive of what hes tryin to do for himself and bring up your concerns in a way thats easy for him to hear.... chances are hell come around eventually... if hes bettering himself theres nothing wrong with that.. encourage him to do fun, not drug related shit with you and try to remind him what it feels like to really live life...

Originally posted by beardofzeus@Feb 15 2006, 11:53 PM

It bothers you that your friend made a commitment to sobriety and is following through with it. You should be happy for him.

Did it occur to you that he might like hanging with his NA friends because they dont try to peer pressure him back into his old habits?

Quoted post

after reading this first reply, i felt no more need for me to read on. this thread shouldve even been closed after this reply.

Take him up on his offer, and go to a meeting with him. It will probably seem pretty wierd, and may be difficult to do, but it would be a really good way to show him that you support him and want to continue to be his friend. As someone mentioned earlier, you kind of have to drop your drug friends if you want to drop your drug habits. The best thing you could do is show him that you are not just a "drug friend", and don't do or talk about that shit in front of him.

Some people do get really sucked into the NA lifestyle, and spend as much time concentrating on sobriety as they used to spend on getting high. If that's what it takes for them, so be it-- its probably for the best-- but a lot of people get past that eventually, and simply resume a normal, healthy, drug free life. All you need to do is give him time, and show him that you want to continue to be a part of that life.

It sucks when you have NOTHING in common with people you hung out with for years.You should be a true friend and support the dude reguardless of what he's doing with his life.

I've had this happen twice,once with drugs and booze and again with anger managment.I have one friend from both those times.

hes found a unity or common thread with the people he knows in NA. he used to hang with kids he would use with, but in order to not use (and the first few years are the hardest to stay clean) he needs to be around people who are going to support and help him stay clean. its not to say that youve lost your friend, its more like he trying to stay away for relaps reasons... he still loves you, but he loves himself, and for himself, he needs to stay around people who understand what hes going through, more as a support system as opposed to a cult. what hes going through is very hard, and the success rate isnt as high as one might think.. it takes the support of his friends.. old and new.

part of the recovery process that involves giving up your old ways (drugs and bmx) and commiting to a new life (sobriety).. sobriety and bmx can go together, but only after drugs and bmx dont.. and same with friends. once there isnt such a strong correlation between friends and drugs, he'll get at you.

james frey?????

Originally posted by johnny ballbags@Feb 16 2006, 10:14 AM

.. some need a break from the bs... some need a family.. some need a reason to live... some want some pussy/dick... or just warm cup of coffee...

Quoted post

...some need to stay out of jail.

Originally posted by Soup@Feb 16 2006, 04:49 AM

I asked him why he likes it so much. He said he couldnt tell me because they have secret rituals that I wouldn't understand. He said he's be happy to take me to one of the meetings, but couldnt discuss with me what they do there.

Quoted post

"The first rule of NA is........"

Hold up, I don't do drugs. We used to snowboard and BMX, things he gave up to give more room to NA. This rehab's just making him depressed and every time you ask him about anything, he gives long speeches of what's wrong with him. "Oh school's hard. You see I did so many drugs in highschool that I forgot how to be a good student, now it's a struggle but I'll hang in there. I've been clean for 296 days brother."

How is doing that to yourself every fucking day healthy? People need hobbies, NA's not a legitimate hobby. I WOULD go with him to NA, but if i got him back on his bike he'd be happy. Whaddaya think?

my brother is in it right now

Originally posted by Soup@Feb 17 2006, 12:05 AM

Hold up, I don't do drugs. We used to snowboard and BMX, things he gave up to give more room to NA. This rehab's just making him depressed and every time you ask him about anything, he gives long speeches of what's wrong with him. "Oh school's hard. You see I did so many drugs in highschool that I forgot how to be a good student, now it's a struggle but I'll hang in there. I've been clean for 296 days brother."

 

How is doing that to yourself every fucking day healthy? People need hobbies, NA's not a legitimate hobby. I WOULD go with him to NA, but if i got him back on his bike he'd be happy. Whaddaya think?

Quoted post

If I had burned away so much of the most vital time in my life for learning things and developing an understanding of the world (rather than spending it in a drug induced fog), i would be pretty bummed too.

I say you quit jocking your friend and let him do his thing.

^word up. maybe you need to just lay off him for a while, it sounds like he's pretty confused and he needs some time to sort his life out.