The power of positive thinking, meditation and crawling out of the pits of dispair

[morton]

I just wanted to second what I hear NOES saying, which is that life is a struggle and to pursue positive activities both major and minor. 

 

Physical fitness as part of a team or group has been a real revelation for me and my well being. I consider that to be major, a minor source of peace in my life is that I load and run the dish washer every night and unload it in the morning.

 

At other times in my life taking care of a chore like the dishes would be a major challenge, and at others I had no dishes or kitchen so there are stages to all of this as well. 

 

[fat ralphy]

3 years ago ended a 16 year relationship that was very unhealthy, at the time I thought it was the worst thing that  could have happened.

 

Now in hindsight its the best thing that could have ever happened to me - despite the fact I now only get to spend halftime with my kids.

 

I have a partner now that uplifts me, works with me and wants to work to make a healthy lasting relationship. At times it feels like I am in a whole new world.

 

@Tails0nEsounds like you are already putting the rubber to the road and starting to separate yourself from an unhealthy relationship- I applaud you and encourage you if its possible to do some counseling/therapy.

 

I did 18 months of therapy and going into it I thought I was the one who was unhealthy in my previous relationship - turns out she was gaslighting me hella and she had all kinds of personal problems that were affecting the relationship overall. 

 

I rely on affirmations and healthier lifestyle to help me when I  start to spiral. I also am communicating completely with my partner and that is new - being 100% vulnerable is scary but I will say that it helps us to keep everything in the open. I think that’s required to have real growth.

 

I put work in and I still have stuff to work on - my upbringing has led me to an “insecure attachment” type. I have anxious attachment but it is getting better and truthfully I am getting to the point with my current partner that I have secure attachment. 

Rambling a bit now but overall it really comes down to our happiness is our responsibility and takes work to cultivate. Props for starting that process.

[misteraven]

I’ve been pretty consistent these days with the Breethe App. I’ve also been listening to audio books on the subject of positivity and affirmation. I have to admit, it’s isn’t easy. In fact I’ve been struggling with stress and depression quite a bit since the holidays. My diet is literally as clean as can be… Essentially I only eat whole foods. I consume zero added sugar with anything and am still on the ultra low carb diet that falls half way between Keto and Carnivore. Supplements and even been testing CBD and micro dosing THC and some days (bonus especially), I feel like I’m getting crushed. Anyhow, just letting everyone know that if you feel the same, you aren’t alone with it. In my case, I think it was amplified after COVID and considering how off the rails the world has gone, it’s far more stressful than ever. Nothing to do, but try and embrace it. Seems like the harder you fight it or try and hide, the longer it lingers. 
 

Anyhow, just an update for anyone still following along. 

[fat ralphy]

Slow and steady.....

 

I have been using this daily journal for the year. It is geared to cultivate progress, positive thinking and reflection.

 

It is helpful and I actually try to put myself fully into the exercises, I can see how over time this type of structure and reflection gets results. 

 

There is a morning and nightly portion which gives a feeling of cohesion and purpose to the day. The exercises relate and draw upon your strengths and are progressive in nature.

 

Self-Mastery Journal - copped on Amazon (smh fucking amazon)

[Tails0nE]

hey all you kool katz and kittenz...

 

definitely has been a while since ive been on here, apologies for going ghost on here after my massive wall of text. After writing that i kind of fell into my own hole of despair and depression and while i do GREATLY appreciate the responses and dms from everyone, i felt kind of like a simp just wining about my problems. Granted, i know that's not the case but in my head re-reading it just seemed like a bunch of "waaaahhh poor me" but i know thats my head just fucking with me.. i guess its only right that i update ya'll with some things since you've taken the time to read my wall-o-text and actually take the time to give some insightful wisdom/advice as well as open up yourselves.

 

so me and the "room mate" now have been ok.. still called it off like right around last april-ish or so.. met someone at my job and slowly it became a big thing.. we definitely fell for eachother but recently she broke it off with me because she started going to therapy herself and with the passing of her dad whom she was extremely close to along with other things shes kind of burried deep inside she said she needs some time alone to process everything and figure herself out but left me with the promise of once she gets her mind right we can pick up right where we left off.. at first it sucked and i kind of slipped up by not giving her said space she asked for but recently we've began speaking again as friends and ive been not trying to bombard her in any way.. so i guess good progress..? at this point im just taking it day by day and put the trust and faith in her that everything will work out the way it should and not trying to put so much pressure on it.. i guess let it happen organically.. if not, it is what it is..

 

as far as the "room mate" situation, we had to renew the lease out of nowhere since management changed and we only had a month to decide on what to do.. she tried saying we can slowly work on us or just stay as "room mates who occasionally fuck" to which i replied we'll see.. tried going with her to her companies holiday party just to be nice, which turned into her getting extremely drunk and trying to fight me in the hotel room along with spitting in my face and bringing up bullshit from 4 years ago. to which brought out the old me and i ended up calling her out on the dude she slept with behind my back that i never mentioned to her that i knew of.. called it from there that we are never working it out anymore.. and since i was seeing the other girl i never slept with her while me and the other one was involved.. shes still lazy and doesnt clean or anything which is hella annoying but at this point its whatever.. im doing what i gotta do to get out and focus on bettering myself she can do whatever she pleases..

 

but now for the more positive aspect of everything.. i did recently buy a used car finally.. had to pull some strings which im beating myself up over but at the end of the day, i bought it on a tuesday, got everything situated by wednesday, insurance on thursday, cashed out no car payments or anything.. as everyone has told me, "pretty baller move", as well as not going for broke as far as savings.. work is stoopid and everyone there is whack.. with them trying to only give me 3 days these past two weeks ive been looking for part time gigs here and there on the side to make that patio season money along with actually following through with this voice over demo reel ive worked on but procrastinated on finishing.. already looked into some agencies to send this reel to so they can start finding work specifically for my type of voice so that way i can slowly make that a more primary source of income yet still have a couple bartending/serving gigs on the side and not have to worry about what restauraunt i will be at next.. cause honestly, the service industry is still fucked but thats an entirely different conversation..

 

all in all i have been journaling alot almost every other day when i do remember or have the time to.. recently got into fountain pens like the nerd i am which makes me want to write even more.. im trying my best to stay positive and take things day by day and not overthink every single negative case scenario that i make up or imagine in my head.. now that i have a car i feel alot more relieved and better about myself.. im pushing myself to stay creative and use that as its own form of therapy although i am looking on going to actual therapy since my recent partner started her journey it kind of gave me the ambition to follow through myself.. im actively picking up extra shifts at work for now to save up more money to hopefully move out on my own within the next couple of months along with trying to have a side gig to help facilitate everything..

 

 

not to create another massive wall-o-text, all in all i guess im doing somewhat better and trying to improve my thought process and actually being proud of my recent accomplishment.. getting back to music has helped me block out the world around me and stops my brain from overthinking like it likes to do.. the living situation is whatever but im doing what i can to get out of it and better myself in any way that i can.. Just wanna give a shout out and thank you to everyone who reached out and actually read and responded to my last post however long ago it was.. I genuinely, truly, whole heartedly appreciate it with everything in me for your responses as well as all of the advice and knowledge you all have given me.. dont think i can thank you guys enough for listening to me ramble on..

 

 

 

love you oontz 🖤

[nicklesndimes]

been thinking a lot. springtime is upon us, i really need to try and get in a positive mindset and enjoy life more. it's like my mind is on a loop, focusing on the negative all the time, when there's so much good to live for.

[LUGR]

4 hours ago, nicklesndimes said:

been thinking a lot. springtime is upon us, i really need to try and get in a positive mindset and enjoy life more. it's like my mind is on a loop, focusing on the negative all the time, when there's so much good to live for.

I think realizing that and putting it out there into the world is a step in the right direction and I’m glad you did. When I read your comment, it also made me take a moment to think about things and say hey, @nicklesndimesis right, “there’s so much good to live for”.

[Tails0nE]

Doing my best as well to keep in a positive mindset.. these past two days have been difficult though.. the whole separation from the girl I was recently talking to sucks but it is what it is at this point so whatever.. but the loss of my friend hurts alot deeper than I thought it would and the only person I'd actually wanna talk to or even be around is them but I can't bother them so I just say fuck it and keep it moving..

 

But the past two days the room mate has been purposely stirring up shit just to get a rise out of me during the middle of me grieving.. I've been in tears on and off this entire week over my buddies passing yet she feels the need to jump to accusations about who I'm gonna be with Saturday during the service.. just cause.. then the other day told me she text my ex from 5 years ago to ask if we were still talking.. just cause.. so because I'm upset at her for starting shit and don't wanna talk to her right now since im still grieving, now I gotta move out because her feelings are hurt over something she created yet I'm still apparently the one in the wrong..

 

Doing my best to stay positive but it's just like everything around me is super negative at this point.. I can barely sleep 4 hours a night if im lucky, no appetite, just surviving off weed water and coffee.. at the same time I'm relieved in a sense to know I have a chance regain my peace and solitude by leaving albeit being so abrupt and sudden at the worst possible timing ever all because of their hurt feelings...

 

Shit sucks right now... but at the same time I know I'll be ok.. things will work themselves out as they should.. just gotta keep pushing forward and keep doing me.. trying to keep that positive mindset were talking about here.. wish me luck on the apartment hunting 🤞🏼

[LUGR]

On 4/5/2024 at 7:09 AM, Tails0nE said:

Doing my best as well to keep in a positive mindset.. these past two days have been difficult though.. the whole separation from the girl I was recently talking to sucks but it is what it is at this point so whatever.. but the loss of my friend hurts alot deeper than I thought it would and the only person I'd actually wanna talk to or even be around is them but I can't bother them so I just say fuck it and keep it moving..

 

But the past two days the room mate has been purposely stirring up shit just to get a rise out of me during the middle of me grieving.. I've been in tears on and off this entire week over my buddies passing yet she feels the need to jump to accusations about who I'm gonna be with Saturday during the service.. just cause.. then the other day told me she text my ex from 5 years ago to ask if we were still talking.. just cause.. so because I'm upset at her for starting shit and don't wanna talk to her right now since im still grieving, now I gotta move out because her feelings are hurt over something she created yet I'm still apparently the one in the wrong..

 

Doing my best to stay positive but it's just like everything around me is super negative at this point.. I can barely sleep 4 hours a night if im lucky, no appetite, just surviving off weed water and coffee.. at the same time I'm relieved in a sense to know I have a chance regain my peace and solitude by leaving albeit being so abrupt and sudden at the worst possible timing ever all because of their hurt feelings...

 

Shit sucks right now... but at the same time I know I'll be ok.. things will work themselves out as they should.. just gotta keep pushing forward and keep doing me.. trying to keep that positive mindset were talking about here.. wish me luck on the apartment hunting 🤞🏼

Good luck with the apartment hunting and RIP to your friend, my condolences.

 

Lean on your Oontz fam when in need, we uplifting spirits in 2024.