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Tails0nE last won the day on April 10 2017

Tails0nE had the most liked content!

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  1. Always seen ads for this online and seen it at the store yesterday and figured I'd give it a try.. definitely different texture wise.. think of, a milkshake with protein powder and oats in it so like a thick oaty consistency that you can drink.. not bad tbh but definitely gave me the shits like 45 minutes afterwards.. not bad tho
  2. So.. I've seen this thread before when someone commented some obviously not positive things a little while ago and with the way my life be lifin' right now I figured I'd take a second to be a little vulnerable with you guys on here in search for some potential positive affirmations/advice or even some would say guidance if you will.. I don't wanna give up too much personal info cause, ya know the whole anonymity thing, but ya boy is not feeling well mentally.. like at all.. and haven't been for quite a fucking while now... Long story short, I feel like I'm stuck in my current situation/relationship and for quite a while now it's been a huge negative impact onto me and my mental health.. she means well but has this victim mentality to where everything is out to get her also can't let go of things from the past even from her previous relationships and constantly throws it in my face.. more importantly, and this is the main thing here, I can't keep being someone's personal therapist when they take everything I say advice/guidance wise and manipulate it to be the most negative thing I can even think of or say.. literally to the point to where it's like those are two completely different sentences.. and especially when I'm still trying to work out my own bullshit and problems let alone yours on top of it.. she claimed she has border personality disorder and only sees black and white, right or left, no in between.. I'm nervous to break it off because that's when she gets petty and starts threatening me with the car we share and that I helped pay for as well as maintenance issues to get my son every other weekend.. she's already done it before when we've argued and even gotten to the point where shell throw my clothes on the couch and tell me to leave, then when I do she blows my shit up hours later and begs me to come back.. everything is such a chore to even talk to her with or about and it's draining to even keep a conversation with her because she eventually throws some negative ass shit in the mix for legit no reason.. This has been an issue to where it's halted my creativity but I don't wanna use her bullshit as a scapegoat for my own procrastination and laziness although it definitely plays a big role in it.. also it irks the fuck out of me of how self aware I am about my own self destruction to where I end up in a never ending loop of self deprecating depression.. like, I haven't created anything in a while, so I'm down about it.. I know I wanna create something, so I try to, but because of whatever bullshit or other life stress, it's hard for me to focus and I don't end up getting as much done as I want to, which gets me down even more.. I realize what's happening, and it gets me down even MORE on top of that because whatever the fuck is interfering with me trying to create and I'm not getting as much as I want done.. yet I realize THAT as well and get pissed with myself to where I'm like "why are you letting this affect you stop being a bitch dude" but because my focus and energy isn't on what I'm trying to create I fuck off and end up playing a game to decompress or some shit.. which results in me getting EVEN MORE upset and pissed with myself because I realize ALL of that shit, yet I'm not doing better to fix the situation.. like, I got energy to play the game but not to do what's important to me which pisses me off EVEN MORE... Then I make a full loop and I'm back to the beginning.. it's honestly the most fucking annoying thing about myself that even I wanna kick my own ass over it.. But with all that being said, I'm really lighting a fire under my ass to get my own car and apartment like ASAP but I'm putting an obnoxious amount of extra stress and pressure on myself to do everything like right this very second because I want out.. like badly.. which I know isn't healthy for me on top of how I already feel on a daily basis with the shenanigans I gotta deal with at home.. let alone my son's mother being extremely difficult for no reason at the most random times.. like I'm trying to do a lot by myself all at once and as quick as possible but I feel it's not that easy nor works that way which I think is more so the reality of things.. I said I was gonna be vulnerable on here because ironically enough I don't have anyone I can express these things to.. my family have their own shit going on and when I talk to my mother it's usually that completely uninterested/barely paying attention conversations where the only responses are "yeah.... Nah I feel you... I understand... Yeah...... But yeah I'm gonna head to the store idk what to make for dinner tonight blahblahblah" so I've kind of refrained from even bothering to speak with them about things like this.. friends, meh... I have trust issues with people even though I have a decent friend group, I've been fucked over too many times in the past to feel comfortable opening up like this with others yet ironically enough I'm here on the internet exposing myself to a bunch of strangers.. yet I feel more trust with you all than others I know IRL if that somehow makes sense.. All in all, even after this massive wall of text, what it comes down to is this... I don't wanna keep living like this.. I don't wanna keep being surrounded by negativity... there's so much more I want to accomplish with my life and staying in this situationship isn't gonna help me get there, yet I have no idea how to maneuver about all of this or what the first step to take is so I'm compiling everything on top of each other and trying to do everything all at once which I realize isn't healthy for my well being especially with how I already feel on a daily basis.. the unnecessary added stress and pressure I'm putting on myself is getting to me on top of everything else and is clouding my head even more than before and I have no idea where to begin... Apologies for the massive wall of text.. I just don't know what else to do or where to turn to.. I guess any and all kinds of advice or positive reinforcements of that sort of whatever would be appreciated.. once again idk why I'm exposing myself like this on the interwebs.. but with practically growing up on here as a kid and a lot of different perspectives on life from different parts of the country/world this platform can share I feel more comfortable talking with you all than others I see on an almost daily basis ironically enough.. sorry for sounding like a TPWF I swear I'm widening my stance so big right now as I'm typing this I'm damn near doing the splits right now... Is this what a mid-life crisis is...? This adulting shit is fuckin wack...
  3. Wow.. mugs really out here all willy nilly with their Piggly wigglies out in the open.. That's wild..
  4. Just got out from a 13 hour bar shift today.. got a lil too stoned waiting for my train so I'm just vibing to this Larry June album right now.. Also completely random, I met Brian Takata today and took care of him throughout the night.. more formerly known as "Drift King" from Fast and the Furious Tokyo Drift.. really nice dude..
  5. Sitting in the bar downstairs bored out of my fucking mind.. don't have a reso until 9 apparently so I've been ripping shots with random coworkers who come down here and making shit.. This is the Final Countdown I spoke of in that jukebox thread.. Vodka, wild rose syrup, lemon juice, cappeletti vino aperitivo, grapefruit juice.. just no grapefruit juice in this one cause fuck that... Lowkey might just get drunk before clocking out at this rate
  6. Just a quick late breakfast nothing too special..
  7. I'm starting to notice a lot more grey hairs pop up on my head.. first it was a couple, now there's a tiny colony on the side that seems to be turning into a strip of grey hair... Wut teh FAWK doods...
  8. We have new cocktails on our menu at work and one of them is literally named "Final Countdown" so every time someone orders one this song pops in my head... I hate that cocktail...
  9. I second this.. years ago when I lived in Colorado for a lil bit I kept getting random roaming charges and my data kept getting run up even when I'd close all my apps and all that jazz.. bill came to like $1400 and I just told them yeah you're not getting that from me you can just cancel everything I'm good.. As for me tho I have T-Mobile right now, $70 a month unlimited everything.. been solid for me so I can't complain
  10. I've heard of the 75 hard but fuck all that noise.. was thinking about doing a 60 day thing tho.. I don't have any gym membership but I got a list of some home routines I could bust out every day for the full 60 at least to get the ball rolling.. just gotta actually pick a day to start but with how much I run around at work it's like fuck it there's my cardio for the day then when I get home it's just weed and chill..
  11. Much appreciated my dude.. yeah I was looking for Hondas but I've seen a lot of VW jettas and Passats show up for a decent amount some with surprisingly low mileage too.. idk after talking with fam they were kinda saying find something not super expensive you could throw down like half on and pay the other half off with the monthly payments instead of going for broke on a lil beater plus I guess it should help out with my credit so I've just been browsing for now till I can figure out the best route to go.. definitely wanna try and make it happen sooner than later just so I can be able to move around easier and hopefully get out of this living situation I'm in but at the same time I'm not in a huge rush to do so..
  12. Looking to get a car soon and was thinking about leasing one that'll last me a while.. something sort of daily driver but to get me to Indiana and back every other weekend for my son.. any car guys got any advice to leasing a car and which ones are solid choices or which cars to avoid?
  13. @metronomeyeah I think it'll be good overall not only with the plot but with him taking control as well.. in that same article I posted it was saying something about him being considered a "cursed/failed director" mainly because his movies don't destroy the box office numbers but he does have a solid following and lots of praise still for the movies he has made like D9, Chappie and others.. hopefully this Gran Turismo does good box office wise so the possibility of that district 9 sequel can pick up some steam again..
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