JUST THE TIP Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 Long story short, the fella that owns the shop I work at is in a wheelchair. He's a really good dude. He's also pervy as fuck. I'm a pretty pervy and shameless individual, so him and I get along great. We're both about being a total shitbag, but at the same time getting paid and handling business. I know that sounds really niggerish, but I don't know how else to put it. Anywho He's in a wheelchair. A hooker was walking down the block, and a co-worker informed me that said women was a known prostitute in the neighborhood. I told my boss I was gonna buy him a blowjob and he started to laugh. "I'm not fuckin joking, dude, peep game, boss.." "You working?", I asked as she strolled by. "Yeh" "How much for a...blowjob?" "$30" "Cool, let's do it in the back of the shop, follow me." I grabbed my boss's chair and started to push him inside the shop, and the hooker then realized she was gonna suck the cock of Captain Cripple. "Uhh....I'm gonna....HIM?" "Yeah, for sure!", I replied with a huge shit eating grin "Are you sure it's OK, i mean, this is a business" "YO, I'm the fuckin owner, dont even trip!" I pushed him through the waiting area of the shop, and we went in the back. I gave him $40 and told him to have fun. Many many many lulz were had all day long due to this adventure. He tried to pay me back, but I refused, "dude, that was $100 worth of laughs and it only cost me $40, don't even fuckin sweat it" "Good lookin out." ---- Karma like a motha fucka PS: chopsticks, if you're reading this - please believe this chick is going to suck your dick when you come to SD. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pfffffffffft Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 "captain cripple"? haah youre a great guy for doing that please describe said hooker, so i can get a visual and a boner Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R@ndomH3ro Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 Way to much taking about other dude's dicks you need to pause on that one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CLICKCLACKONER Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 Pics? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark_Knight Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 boners Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SystemFailure Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 Dear R@ndom, Can't believe I'm saying this but you sound like way more of a faggot for the "Where's the nohomo bro?" It's a funny story plain and simple. DICKDICKDICKDICKDICKDICKDICKDICKDICK Sincerely, You're a faggot Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JUST THE TIP Posted July 31, 2010 Author Share Posted July 31, 2010 "captain cripple"? haah youre a great guy for doing that please describe said hooker, so i can get a visual and a boner mid to late 30s. white. thin. somewhat well dressed in a skirt and tank top. she was pretty tan and her teeth weren't too disgusting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MedicineCabinet Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 not trying to be a DICK, but is your boss paralyzed from the waist down? if so, i didnt know they could get it up it mustve been jesus good on you though Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TRANNYHANDJOBSONER Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 i support this thread Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JUST THE TIP Posted July 31, 2010 Author Share Posted July 31, 2010 he isnt paralyzed. he has MS and is learning to walk again. he can still get his dick hard. in fact, one of the old filipino chicks at his physical therapy home blow him on a regular basis after they shower him. he introduced me to her. she's a really nice gal. the other day his stripper ex-wife was in town and they needed a ride back to the shop, so i picked them up. i drive a two seater pickup, so she had to sit on his lap while we drove to work. she has enormous fake tits, and to see her, all dolled up, sitting on his crippled lap in my piece of shit pickup, made me lulz like a mother fucker. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a kid growin up Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 You're a true hero. Props. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
somedude Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 Dow I'm moving down there next week and I'm gonna live with you, sorry to inform you on such short notice but I feel raided house eviction status is fully accecptable. Ps... I have sleeping bag so any area of the floor my short body will fit will be my sleeping quarters, fuck yo couch! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boris The Butcher Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 "Go tell disney all your fuckin' duck tales" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrChupacabra Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 Dow: the coolest scumbag on 12oz. SCUMLIFE 2K10. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grimes Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 That's some real shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reuben Kinkaid Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 I need to go and visit San Diego... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R@ndomH3ro Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 Dear R@ndom, Can't believe I'm saying this but you sound like way more of a faggot for the "Where's the nohomo bro?" It's a funny story plain and simple. DICKDICKDICKDICKDICKDICKDICKDICKDICK Sincerely, You're a faggot Calm down dude, I can see your visibly upset over the internets Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JUST THE TIP Posted July 31, 2010 Author Share Posted July 31, 2010 ps when i met mudpuddles, she spent half the time complaining about how lame her husband is (tuanie tuan). she also told me he recycles scrap metal for a living and cries a lot (like, literally, he cries over dumb shit). hahahah faggot Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R@ndomH3ro Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 That is pretty sad....more sad that they have kids Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JUST THE TIP Posted July 31, 2010 Author Share Posted July 31, 2010 you're gonna make him cry 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R@ndomH3ro Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 He should cry, cry to be a man and get a better job. See what I did there? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JUST THE TIP Posted July 31, 2010 Author Share Posted July 31, 2010 tuanie, if youre reading this. be sure to save the metal from the ball peen hammers that crack your head if you're stupid enough to go to you-know-where in SF next weekend. you done fucked up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
christo-f Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 I endorse this thread. However I do not endorse man tears. Tell your boss I said G'day and slap his Pinoy helper on the butt for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I_fell_off_the_bike Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 boner Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JUST THE TIP Posted July 31, 2010 Author Share Posted July 31, 2010 i cant tell him "g'day". he gets pissy at me when i use the term "mate" and insists i use the word "mang" instead. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
christo-f Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 Hmmm, ok, tell his Pinoy helper I said G'day and slap your boss on the butt for me, then. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JUST THE TIP Posted July 31, 2010 Author Share Posted July 31, 2010 the only time i have access to his butt is when i help him from his wheelchair to the passenger seat of my truck, and thats srs bzznss. kind of. today he had really bad shakes and i teased him about his future career as a breakdancer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boris The Butcher Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 tuanie, if youre reading this. be sure to save the metal from the ball peen hammers that crack your head if you're stupid enough to go to you-know-where in SF next weekend. you done fucked up. I heard about this tuanie guy-----somethin' about comin' to sf with a gun and shooting somebody---------------who is taunie-------?------------ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JUST THE TIP Posted July 31, 2010 Author Share Posted July 31, 2010 i doubt he's going to do shit except: a) continue recycling scrap metal like a faggot b) crying c) getting his card pulled for being a cry baby faggot that recycles scrap metal for a living 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boris The Butcher Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 I got the call about this "tuanie" guy----------------talkin' shit to the wrong person----------- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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