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defyoner

accidental self infliction / bad ideas. superthread.

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seeing as though i always seem to hurt myself and do stupid shit i figured id make an awesome superthread about stupid shit that ends up as wounds or pain.

 

today, July 12th, ~9:45pm..

 

i went swimming. decided to try to swim legnth wise under water starting in the shallow end (ive done this before with no messups). so i go under water.. push off the wall.. get about 6 feet forward from my launch and my face meets the bottom of the pool. now it looks like i got strong armed by a sandpaper man. i bled quite a bit in the pool so that was kinda cool. but then it started burning.

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this is no shit.

yesterday me and my bro were fishing, we were done and started walking done the wharf when we saw this little fish swimming along the surface of the water. My brother crept up and grabbed it just as it was about to pass under the whaft. It was a perfect tiny miniature baby shark, about 15 centimetres. it gave my bro a nice little cut. We put it back. I wish i had a fish tank for it, it was sooo radtastic. no camera unfortunately.

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atleast i didnt break my nose. but i have a really nice big scratch/cut on it.. like i got hit with a chain.

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the only recent accident i've had is being a retard and wearing a pair of flipflops with no tread left on the bottom, thus allowing me to slide 5 feet across the trainstation parkinglot, removing a layer of skin off of my foot.

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The next time I accidentley ram my toes into an object in my house, I swear to Allah i'm going to kill someone.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

P.s Post 666

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My seat post was too high on the ole Bridgestone, so my nads were killin me. Instead of pulling over and fixing it I held onto the seatpost with both hands and hoisted my balls off the saddle. Then the brilliant idea of going round turns in this position pops into the brainium, and it works for the first two turns.

 

Third's the charm: goodbye entire skin from wrist to armpit, and knee.

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Oh, and another time my friends and I were racing shifter karts. It was fucking hot outside so I had my FLAME REDARDENT suit's sleeves rolled up... eventually there was an accident and my forearm got banged against the engine behind the seat. That left a two and a half inch scar.

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suprisingly i havent burned myself lately.. and on top of that, i just rekindled my love for strike any where matches.

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I'm good at this shit.

 

Kitchen burns are my specialty...been lucky lately, however.

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most of my self inflicted wounds are done while snowboarding

or at work

I have this problem with not watching where I'm going and walking into things, elbow first, stubbed toes, etc

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any of you guys remember my drunken experiments with self applied accupuncture? cause i'm pretty sure that falls into the 'bad idea' catagory.

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dude,, u can do accupuncture?

 

ive got some digestive issues and aches and pains, help me out.

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any of you guys remember my drunken experiments with self applied accupuncture? cause i'm pretty sure that falls into the 'bad idea' catagory.

 

that might have been during my mandatory vacation.

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