First grade rules.

[soupBDC]

My friend works as a first grade teacher and every week it's something new (think southpark). This week a student came up to my friend and told her that another student had kneed him in the butt. When approached by my friend about the school's "no touching" policy, the alleged butt kneer responded, "I only 'corndogged' him." You can urban dictionary that one if you haven't heard of corndogging. I fucking hadn't.

 

Next theres a girl in the class we've come to agree has a sister in middle school that needs to be tasered. This girl has told the entire class what "humping" means, and now every recess there's three or four kids bugging her to define humping. That may not seem that bad by Ch0 standards but first the kids start asking what certain words mean, then turns it into the "why" game about sex then the fucking parents come to the school with pitch forks and torches and it all just goes downhill.

 

But lets turn this into sharing experiences about first grade, or at least around that time.

 

In kindergarden I lost my first tooth when one of the black kids in class (WB kids club, tap dancing nigra) came up behind me when I was drinking water from a concrete water fountain and slammed my face into it on some racewar shit. I didn't hate the guy after but I was fucking confused as hell. I do hate his fucking parents tho.

 

Between kindergarden and first grade there was a mentally retarded kid named justin (think Timmy) who had a motorized wheel chair which was cool because you could jump on the back of it and he'd zip around the playground until the teachers pulled you off that and told you it wasn't nice to do that. Justin didn't give a fuck. We just thought it was fun.

 

Second or third grade clubs somehow became cool so I went to pier one and bought those sunglasses with shades instead of lenses and gave them to my friends. We'd hang out during daycare even if we wern't in daycare and play five card stud for jolly ranchers and pennies. One of the daycare counselors would join in and throw down real money which made us feel cool.

[CACashRefund]

First grade

 

All the latin kids would beat up the chinese kids and this one white guy named kevin

For no other reason other than the school was predominantly latin in a latin neighborhood

 

Also there was this black girl named laura and she was hella on my nuts until i grabbed her sweater and put it into the toilet and then flushed the toilet

 

And i remember this kid in my class who was always , ALWAYS late to school

 

Even though the nigga lived next door

 

LITERALLY NEXT DOOR

 

the only thing that seperated the school and his house was a chainlink fence

 

what the fuck

[Q666]

in first grade i was in tae kwon do class and i had just started it and thought i was a tough guy

 

so i was on the bus and this chinese kid was sitting next to me and i said hi to him and

he ignored me, so i punched him in the stomach, and then he punched me in the face

 

:lol:

[shai]

First grade

 

And i remember this kid in my class who was always , ALWAYS late to school

 

Even though the nigga lived next door

 

LITERALLY NEXT DOOR

 

the only thing that seperated the school and his house was a chainlink fence

 

what the fuck

 

Sounds like me. That nigga needed a pair of bolt cutters.

[TreSixO]

I learned to gamble for legos in rigged ass poker games in after school programs

My teacher hated me , I played number munchers on the apple 2 and would kill all my settlers in oregon trail so I could leave mad toumbstones all over the place

 

 

Ahhh New Haven

[MitchThe$nitch]

Maybe its the years of booze etc. But I don't remember all that much about first grade. I do remember going to the library where they would show recent movies - well this one was superman 3 i think. somewhere around 1982. i went with this girl down the street. she wanted to kiss - i think we did. i know, thats weird.

 

i remember sharpening my pencil for some reason and it had no cap, so we had to do it over the garbage can. there was this chica by the can i would first grade mack on - so i sharpened a lot of pencils.

 

i remember watching the electric company at lunch time i think.

 

i remember recess was awesome and the swings seemed huge.

[BRAINBUGS]

in kindygarden

i got pwned by a blind black chick named keisha.

she stole all of my pencils & broke them into tiny pieces

and put the pieces back in my desk. i was pissed.

[SHIT$REAK]

1st grade it was super cool to make up new things to do on the swings... I remember making up this move where when you got the swing up towards its highest point you would turn over and lay on your stomach in the swing.. I think I called it the "Superman"

 

Oh and seeing how far you could jump from a swing made you super cool too.

[TreSixO]

. I think I called it the "Superman"

.

YUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!

[fatpussyforacocksucker]

in first grade my teacher used to make us pull our pants down and bendover so he could take pictures

[TreSixO]

4 square or STFU

 

 

no tea parties you dummmmmies

[shitting]

I never heard the words 'cunt' and 'faggot' until my first fews days of school.

 

Every craze that happened at primary school, (that wasn't gay) I hustled a better collection than everyone hands down. marbles was my fave.

 

 

primary school (elementary school) was the balls.

[fatpussyforacocksucker]

i loved to lay kids out i didnt like in red rover

[Spitfire15]

First grade.

 

 

Taking to 2 kids heads and smashing them together for no reason. I was a dick.

[TreSixO]

First grade.

 

 

Taking to 2 kids heads and smashing them together for no reason. I was a dick.

 

yo

 

I got in mad trouble for doing thaqt on a school trip to the beach

You watched 3 stooges too eh?

[En Sabah Nur]

i don't remember that shit. first grade? that was hella much ago.

[publicenemyno.3]

i wasnt feeling well so i went up to the teachers desk to say so. however, this particular teacher was adamant about being courteous and waiting patiently in line, so i did this. when the other students were done asking questions and i was finally my turn i said "i dont feel so..." and vomited all over her and the desk.

 

this kid used to try and fuck with me during cub scouts, only he was just about my size so it was more of an annoyance than anything. one day i got tired of it and snapped. choked him out. i wasnt welcome at cub scouts anymore.

[XJONATHONX]

Was I the only good kid? We would always have races and shit. Scored my first pair of Jordans in third grade. My 2nd grade teacher Ms. Banks was fucking beautiful. One a pair of adidas from cubscouts cuz i hustled the most popcorn. I was always getting mad drawing books from the library. In fourth grade some kid named Ricky was always stealin kids pencils and shit. Pokemon cards and gel pens were the shit. Then kids started getting there gel pens stolen so they stopped selling them at the school store. 5th grade I was introduced to graffiti and public enemy. I went downhill from there...

[yukon jack]

i learned all the swear words in the lunchroom the first day of grade one

[Hayabusa]

First titty ever was grade 7 it was hilerious

the girl was the only one with boobs and everyone was on it

 

 

i got in trouble for drawing a chick with giant knockers, and almost had my parents called in for it

 

Id always wanna fight kids but theyd run away

 

This one time me and my buddy were coming home, he was jumping from tree stump to stump, while they were wet. i told him not to but he didnt listen. Dude jammed his knee breaking his leg when he slipped off of one shortly after i told him not to do it

 

I had to carry him home

 

 

 

Used condoms on the basketball court...no one knew what it was since we were like grade 4-5...but the older kids did. THey convinced some kid it was a balloon and that he should touch it. THe older girls told him not to. Everyone had a crush on them cuz they were so hot!!!

 

In kindergardn i caught a rock with my head, and had to get rushed to the ER for stitches, sans anasthetics. I can still remember how that felt.

[OLSE]

in first grade we had divided class rooms so there was second grade in there too. So the teachers would teach one side of the class then the other.

 

One day I was doing my work and i get belted int eh side of the head by some black kid and eventually thrown across my desk. I didnt know why till I was in the principals office with him and he said i called him a nigga.

 

Sad day for me because i never heard that word til then and I was like whats that even MEAN!?

 

needless to say he was making it up and All of the class hated me til i moved in 5th grade to the suburbs.

 

AND

 

When I was in third or fourth grade we thought we were power rangers and wed do fuckin martial arts all over the place and i kicked my friend in the side of the head really hard. he got knocked out. I was hte white ranger

[dosa312]

I think it was like 2nd or 3rd grade... but when the Thriller video came out... they gave us the option at lunch time to watch the thriller video over & over again or go play outside. EVERYONE watched the thriller video almost every day for a month until they stopped letting us.

[eliserx]

4 square, pokemon, gel pens.. damn.

 

In 1st grade my PE teacher used to always read us that Where the Sidewalk Ends book now and then.. I remember The Stinky Cheese Man too.. I didn't even know what the middle finger stood for 'til then. I'm white & I sat at a table with three hispanic kids who knew english but not too well.. they became my best friends instantly. I gave them all chicken pox, haha. I lost my tooth in class in kindergartin and told my teacher and I remember everyone clapped. &every other word was 'fuck' by 5th grade.

Then middle school.. a kid in my spanish class used to steal gel-pens from girls and I'd trade nascars and other toy cars for them. And I remember my purse being stolen.. and when I got it back from the lost and found all my pokemon cards had been taken.. I cried. haha, didnt even care that my lunch money was gone too.

 

&RACEWARS? those didnt start for me until highschool, I was never a part of them but I enjoyed watching EXCEPT when people I grew up with were involved. I really didn't notice color until these started going on. sucks how people change in highschool too.

[HydrogenPeroxide]

in elementary school wrestling was getting big for the first time, like werstlemania 3 and 4. so every recess we'd have 20 deep wrestling matches. was even more fun in the snow because you could jump off the hand rails to go off the top rope.

 

we had a kick ass park that wouldn't even get built today because some kid would get hurt and the parents would sue the shit out of the city, anyway we'd do mad stunts like running across the top of the monkey bars and shit.

 

kickball.. who can forget that?

 

 

there was this black girl latoya who came from jamaica or somewhere and was a few years older but had to be in 4th grade to catch up. my homies would give her corn chips at recess and she would show us her pussy. i have no idea how old she really was, but that was the hairiest 4th grade pussy i ever saw

[ezik]

I hung out with the special ed class at recess in first grade for some reason.

 

that's all I remember.

[soupBDC]

Haha they had a special ed class in first grade? How retarded were they?

[statenisland]

I think it was like 2nd or 3rd grade... but when the Thriller video came out... they gave us the option at lunch time to watch the thriller video over & over again or go play outside. EVERYONE watched the thriller video almost every day for a month until they stopped letting us.

 

funniest thing in this thread.

 

 

I, personally remember telling a girl in kindergarten that If she shows me her pussy Ill show her my dick. she did, I didn't.

[Porcelain]

hmm first grade. i was on the marble grind. pwning niggas.

 

and pissing in water fountains

[$kilgkcuf.WORD]

In 1st grade i had my middle finger on my left had completely chopped off, some broad closed the door on my hand.

[Pistol]

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