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lord_casek

What Happens To Your Body If You Drink A Coke Right Now?

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Have you ever wondered why Coke comes with a smile? It’s because it gets you high. They took the cocaine out almost a hundred years ago. You know why? It was redundant.

  • In The First 10 minutes: 10 teaspoons of sugar hit your system. (100% of your recommended daily intake.) You don’t immediately vomit from the overwhelming sweetness because phosphoric acid cuts the flavor allowing you to keep it down.
  • 20 minutes: Your blood sugar spikes, causing an insulin burst. Your liver responds to this by turning any sugar it can get its hands on into fat. (There’s plenty of that at this particular moment)
  • 40 minutes: Caffeine absorption is complete. Your pupils dialate, your blood pressure rises, as a response your livers dumps more sugar into your bloodstream. The adenosine receptors in your brain are now blocked preventing drowsiness.
  • 45 minutes: Your body ups your dopamine production stimulating the pleasure centers of your brain. This is physically the same way heroin works, by the way.
  • >60 minutes: The phosphoric acid binds calcium, magnesium and zinc in your lower intestine, providing a further boost in metabolism. This is compounded by high doses of sugar and artificial sweeteners also increasing the urinary excretion of calcium.
  • >60 Minutes: The caffeine’s diuretic properties come into play. (It makes you have to pee.) It is now assured that you’ll evacuate the bonded calcium, magnesium and zinc that was headed to your bones as well as sodium, electrolyte and water.
  • >60 minutes: As the rave inside of you dies down you’ll start to have a sugar crash. You may become irritable and/or sluggish. You’ve also now, literally, pissed away all the water that was in the Coke. But not before infusing it with valuable nutrients your body could have used for things like even having the ability to hydrate your system or build strong bones and teeth.

This will all be followed by a caffeine crash in the next few hours. (As little as two if you’re a smoker.) But, hey, have another Coke, it’ll make you feel better.

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Also this thread name can be easily made fun of in two or three word adjustments

 

 

 

i endorse name changes. fully. i think it's funny.

 

 

"what happens to your coke if you drop a body right now?"

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Guest spectr

wow thats funny.. I am drinking a coke right now... for the first time in a while... thanks casek... you just ruined my enjoyment of this beverage... and it is the first time in a fucking while I have drank one...

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if you guys want to see something fucked up, drop a piece of meat in a pan of coke and let it sit overnight.

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I only like Coke if it is mixed with cheap red wine and or espresso coffee. Thanks ma for raising me with out soda pop and junk food!!

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Guest spectr
I only like Coke if it is mixed with cheap red wine and or espresso coffee. Thanks ma for raising me with out soda pop and junk food!!

 

I used to drink coke mixed with instant coffee... if you get the mix right it tastes good and wakes you the fuck up real quick....

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Oh wow. That sounds like a real crazy way to wake up. Kind of like how in high school I'd empty a pack of powdered coffee into my mouth and then wash it down with water because I was only sleeping 3-4 hours a night.

 

Calimocho (from the Basque Kalimotxo) is a drink consisting of approximately 50% red wine and 50% cola-based soft drink. Alternative names include Rioja libre (from "Rioja", and "Cuba Libre"), and either kali or motxo (shortened from the Basque name).

In Chile the drink is known as jote (chilean Spanish for vulture), and in Croatia it is known as bambus (croatian for bamboo). In the Czech Republic it is known as "houba."

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now imagine what happens when you do this to yourself:

 

 

You turn into a pippy 12oz moderator who has no heart at all?

 

 

I just deicided I wont drink coke for a while, too bad I just bought a fuck load of cola too.

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damn, you still got sand in your vagina cos i closed that pointless bullshit thread full of toys and snitches? it's about time you got over it

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i'm seriously about to pour a big glass of coke.

only live once. why not live with a rotting liver and

some colon polyps.

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