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kodak

how to have sex amish style

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Turn off all the lights in your house. The Amish have no electricity, which means every sexual encounter takes place by romantic candlelight.

 

Wear plain, modest clothing, which covers up most of your body. All the more to intensify the feeling of discovery when the clothing comes off. With the revealing fashions many women wear today, there is no surprise when the clothing comes off, and thus, it is less of a turn-on.

 

Purchase some farm animals to keep around your yard. The Amish are constantly around farm animals that are reproducing. This reinforces the fact that sex is natural and that man is a sexual animal as well.

 

Regularly read the Bible, a book which encourages a healthy sex life between husband and wife.

 

Turn off all radios and TVs. Hide any movies or mainstream newspapers or magazines — so there’s no comparison between the “perfect” media fantasy people and your own romantic partner.

 

Buy a butter churn. When you see your partner churning away, it’ll be an erotic sight that you won’t soon forget.

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Guest duh-rye-won

no condoms either

 

i don't think amish fuck unless they tryin to make babies.

that weird al video was funny.

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You wouldn't have electricity for tv's or radio's. Besides, Amish ladies have beards.

 

This would kick ass if it didn't suck.

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read that again buddy..

he's telling us, people who live in houses with electricity, how to have sex amish style.

turn off the lights, tv, radio, etc..

get it?

it's not so difficult.

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What's electricity? No, if you really wanna do it Amish style, throw your fuckin T.V. off the stairs. Good try though.

 

I'm talkin Al Queda style.

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Originally posted by Dirty_habiT

I'm talkin Al Queda style.

 

I don't think anyone here is interested in fucking a dead goat in a cave, of course, alot of y'all suprise me sometimes...

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Guest SMUGGLER RSH

Who would want to have sex Amish fantasy style....I bet all they do is recite the prayers while fucking and then all they can think about is when they will next be in church....

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torch light dinner of cave geckos/bats/rodents.... afterwards bearded man stares longily into shifty bearded lady's "take me right now in this cave and shuck me raw baby yeah" eyes, followed by the bearded clam surprise. Wooo, I need to go dry off.

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Originally posted by Kettiecat

sounds romantic when

 

are you going to pick me up?

 

 

sorry babygirl im taken

:cool:

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