crime stoppers

An "MRA" is a mens' rights activist...think about it.

Forced to Bathe: A Cat’s Shame Today started out like any other day. I was sleeping peacefully in my cat cave, not a worry in the world, until the humans in my house decided to ambush me. My mom quietly snuck into my room with a full glass of water and dumped it on my head while I was in the middle of a dream. It scared the shit out of me, so I screamed and fell off the bed. I scrambled to run out of my room and as soon as I reached the hallway, my dad and my sister grabbed me and pushed me into the bathroom and held the door shut. I have never been so upset and confused in my whole life. I wailed and banged on the door and just asked them WHY over and over. Then I heard my mom talking through the door. She said that no one was going anywhere until I took a shower and that I would be trapped until I pass her inspection. I hate being told what to do and I was already really angry from being scared half to death, so I curled up on the floor and howled, refusing to give them what they wanted. After five minutes, I tried to open the door again but they were still there. I pleaded with my dad, but he kept saying to just shutup and take the damn shower. I realized I had lost this battle. So I anxiously turned on the shower and made myself go inside. I washed my hair and combed it. I put their awful smelling human soap all over me. I did everything my mother demanded of me. When I was done, my mom handed me new clean clothes through the door. They won. My parents broke me today. I was forced to wear department store clothes made out of non-environmentally friendly fabric. I wanted to cry, but I didn’t want to make their victory any sweeter, so I held it in. After I changed, I nervously crawled out the door and looked around. The three of them were standing there smiling at me like this was some kind of a game. My mom patted me on the head and said I could go back to sleep. I made sure to glare at my dad as I sulked back to my room in shame. He was supposed to be my only ally in this house but today he betrayed me. I have no one on my side anymore. The injustice of living with humans is too much to bear. I don’t get what is so hard about leaving me to groom as I please, in peace. I haven’t left my room since this morning. My hair smells weird. I need to go outside to get the stench off of me. God parents are such a pain sometimes. I can’t wait until I don’t have to deal with any of their shenanigans anymore. One day. One day, I will be free. I can only hope I survive until then.

tonight (written at 2am) met up with said convict dude and gave my hangover some more alcohol to deal with, talked shit about life like a fucking philosofiser or something. as i split from my dirty south african friend i hear some fuck screaming my name...it's the germans...zee fucking germans, ja? they demand for their mighty white penises to be blown and i direct them to some cunt who deals with stranded tourists in search of tight, tight Polish vagina. these bitches were gorgeous, imagine a woman, now imagine a woman with whom you'd like to sex up and whatnot--that be the women we saw. asses so fucking tight you'd give up a testicle to penetrate their bodacious anuses. on the way out my friends asked for a whore-house and then pretended not to have money, i'm not sure why but it was fucking stupid. some indian dude was complaining to one of the dudes trying to get people into their club, that why are they being harassed to go see naked women. i interjected and said "welcome to town, you fucking square'" those bitches were lost when i went retro on their ass. it was hilarious. so that was my follow-up night, i saw some outrageously tight polish pussy and directed my friends towards places to find some snatch. THA END.

last night; met a bunch of germans from a town called Bremen, i know it's a small place and your two choices for a night are alcohol and spousal abuse--i knew these dudes would be down to party. in true german--we're better than you, that's why we invaded--style, these assholes booked a limousine for 3 hours and stocked it with an assload of booze and invited me to tag along. we got along pretty fucking well, they loved nose candy and strippers, and i speak german...kinda. after drinking way more than i should have, i insulted someones mother, pissed in a obscenely public place and gave my National Socialist Party brothers an irish goodbye. this is where the story should end, but the only thing that ends is my ability to remember things and my capacity to make sound choices. now, i live in a hostel, which makes certain problems more problematic--and when you're blackout drunk you tend to do bad things. from the evidence i have found in the bathroom down the hall and in my room i can only assume that i furiously vomitted on the floor of my room, walked to the bathroom, stripped naked, vomitted more and walked bare-assed back to my room where i proceeded to fall over in my vomit and then passed out in bed. the receptionist tells me that i was more drunk than he's ever seen me, if you know me--which you faggots don't--you'll know that that is a big, big fucking statement. i still haven't mopped up the vomit, nor thrown out the rancid towel and clothing i soiled, but i did ejaculate on the floor just now, because it couldn't get worse than it already fucking is. i'm a dirty human being, and i'm going to celebrate that fact by nursing my hangover with 2 dollar one litre beers and kick it with my amazingly depraved, convict buddy, Des. fuck y'all.

the sizing of that flick is fucking nonsense, i had to check who it was because i was thinking it was a new user... i am dissapoint son. /wonksaggin.

co-ding? what is this sorcery you speak of?

^that isn't a timetable.

German court to decide the future of Technoviking; In a Berlin courtroom earlier today, the Technoviking met his maker. The star of one of the most emblematic Internet cultural phenomenons of the past decade is suing the artist who surreptitiously filmed him, claiming he stole his image and profited from the results. The birth of the Technoviking character began more than a decade ago, at 2pm on a cloudy day at the 2000 techno music festival Fuckparade in Berlin. Artist Matthias Fritsch had brought his camera to the event and focused it on a crowd of dancers. If you've watched videos on the Internet over the past five years, you probably know what happens next: A bumbling dancer stumbles into the frame, crashing into a woman. That's when you see him: Tall, with blond hair pulled back into a ponytail and the menacing musculature of a WWE wrestler, the giant snatches the other man's arms and shoves him away, then points menacingly after him. A few seconds later, satisfied with his display of authority, he starts to march. The other dancers follow in seemingly spontaneous lockstep. Someone runs up and hands him a water bottle, with the cool deference of a dark age thane to his viking lord. All along, techno music thumps in the background. And then, the gentle giant starts his dance... http://www.dailydot.com/news/technoviking-german-lawsuit-matthias-fritsch/ ...hahahaha

Why white people cant be victims of racism The definition of racism: the idea that one’s own race is superior and has right to rule others. People get racism and prejudice confused. White people can never be the victim of racism but they can be the victim of prejudice. Would an african american/asian/hispanic person EVER beleive to be superior to whites? No. But whites think they’re superior and they can cause theyve ruled the world so many years. No race but the white race has a superiority complex as laid out in the definition of racism. So you are all wrong, minorities cant be racist and white people cant be victims of racism. But like I said…prejudice is different. Everyone can be guilty of prejudice.

Cope2, FAGET BITCHASS MOFO!!!!!!! *POINTS AT SOMETHING*

all i can find on tin eye (reverse image search) is that her first name is apparently diana. sorry.

button-up fly's. what the fuck is that shit and why do people think it's a good idea. ass clowns man.

^want EDIT* i will not apologise for the size of this image, that gorgeous vagine needs to be shown in all its glory.

^it's a pullover faget. do you like fish sticks? do you like fish sticks in your mouth?

Faxe, the preferred beer of alcoholics in north Europe. they sell 1L cans of 10% beer, they hit like a fucking freight train.

"My vaginal bacon buffet was trembling like Michael J. Fox licking a car battery." that was my favourite part.

^yes. finished watching some shitty Steven King movie at the hostel, waiting for my pizza and garlic sauce, then going to have some sessex with the womyn

Okay, it's kind of a long story, but here goes..... I was 18 and my boyfriend asked me to come over to watch a movie and have a few drinks. Now, I've seen more helmets than hitler, but the sight of his brie baton made my tuna tunnel tears trickle like a hungry pug at a trough. Leaving my panties sunny side up on the floor was the least of my worries as his ocean's 11 inches rammed deeper into my brown mile. Hours of plowing like this would leave any girl's hairy goblet looking like a manatee in yoga pants, and I was no different! The unrelenting orgasms from his cheese-crusted cock hammering my depravity cavity made me come so hard, I began sweating like a paedo during a prison riot. The fucking makes me flood my fallopian fish stock all over his long-dong silver. The filling of his Da Vinci load dripping down my throat got my spaff flowing quicker than greased shit off a shiny shovel. The fucking of my chocolate starfish was so vigorous, he soon found his man berries joining his slut slayer deep in my shit winker. Within no time, I could feel the shitty steamin' semen seeping from my fudge factory and all over my swollen budgie's tongue. The feeling of his steamin semen flowing down my throat got my fallopian fish stock flowing quicker than snot off a whip. My vaginal bacon buffet was trembling like Michael J. Fox licking a car battery. I awoke the next morning with my curly fuck trench still flowing. I thought it was over but his love lollipop had other ideas. The thrusting makes me flood my sex wee all over his cunt plunger. He pitched a giant hardened fudge nugget on my rack just so he could devour it up like a bulldog eating porridge. The mixture of corn-eyed butt snake and penis pudding in my fart valve created the delicious sphincter sauce that he was so fond of. With my swollen budgie's tongue now much like the south end of a badger going north, he thought it was time to start showing my rusty sheriff's badge. Is now the time to tell him I really need to crown a butt nugget, I wondered? By now, my penis pothole was draining like Augustus Gloop at Willy Wonka's chocolate river. He munched on my Velcro triangle, even though I'd been surfing the crimson tide for the best part of a week. I couldn't wait to lap the man fat from his gristle missile. The unrelenting orgasms from his thrill drill hammering my cum dumpster made me come so hard I began sweating my blind lesbian fish shop. The pounding makes me flow my shrimp sap all over his baloney pony. After having my sperm socket pounded, he then proceeds to fuck my oxo orifice. My cake hole was so full of throbbing quim dagger and love mayonnaise, the love piss was leaching down my chin and onto my fiery biscuits. With his tenderloin truncheon hammering deep into my south mouth, the sensation of his cream reaper smashing my cervix made me quake like Muhammad Ali on a tumble dryer. Once agian, the unrelenting orgasms from his washington monument thrusting my kipper dingly made me come so hard, I began sweating like a gypsy near an unlocked shipping container. And that's how I lost my virginity.

^ i remember seeing that post. apparently that's a pre-op dude in the photo. google "why i need feminism" and you'll see some awesome shit on a non-social justice note, i'm watching a girl stencilling shit in an exceptionally confined space with no ventilation and no idea what she's doing...she doesn't seem to care about the side effects of being an idiot with spray paint.

VAJ and all the lulz associated therein.

hathawaylane asked: You do realize that this is your fault in that you should have not been doing that with the door unlocked. She could arrive at any moment she wants because she lives there so it's your responsibility to be respectful and be on the safe side. It's called being an adult. Stop acting like a 7 year old. So your SHAMING me now? First of all you dont know shit you stupid bitch. SHE wrote me saying she wouldnt be back until TODAY when she came back early and had been there since THURSDAY. Our door was locked but she has a FUCKING KEY. So after she had dinner with her friends she CAME BACK AND I DIDNT KNOW SHE WOULD BE. GO ROT IN FUCKING HELL BITCH! HOW DARE YOU SHAME ME! edit* she was masturbating, hard. i feel like i'm the massgraff of the true or false thread up in this bitch right now.