I wish I was a Samurai

[MedicineCabinet]

If you want to see a fuckin awesome modern swordsmen film then watch the best.

 

bump

 

recommended for those seeking less artsy shots & more guys getting hacked in half with anime-like gore

[pornbooth]

 

[LexDiamonds]

YAKUZA'S NIGGA!!!

[LexDiamonds]

[asthma al]

agree samurais are dope..

[earl broclo ESQ]

One of my favorites:

 

 

 

It's not only the swordplay, but the cinematography and content. Sword of Doom is about a swordsman who focuses all of his negative chi into his sword, which is basically like an evil jedi master compared to Obi-One.

[earl broclo ESQ]

Takeshi Kitano is one of my favorite film makers. Zatoichi was definitely a good flick. I also recommend Sonatine, Fireworks, Brother, and Kikujiro.

 

He's fucking hilarious in Kikujiro.

[CityonSMASH]

 

you do not want to fuck with this guy.

[earl broclo ESQ]

I also recommend this book:

 

 

I think that must be the new cover. I have an old version of the book, and it's a silver cover.

 

 

I was a fanatic about samurai film for a few years. That book gives you some background on samurai history, then a shitload of info on the film makers and characters within those films.

 

If you want to really get into shit, read Sun-Tzu's "The Art of War."

 

 

I've never read the whole thing, but for a while I was printing out chapters at my office job and taking 20 minute shits. I actually took a lot from what I read, and put it towards my life.

 

Takeshi Kitano's Zatoichi is good, but there have been a few different "Zatoichi's" over the past 50 years. My favorite was Shintaro Katsu.

 

 

His series is definitely worth checking out.

 

Has anyone mentioned the best series to come out of the whole "spaghetti western" influence?

 

Lone Wolf and Cub

 

 

That is one of the best blood squirting everything, heads flying through the air, with a baby in the backpack series of films out there.

 

Add this series to your netflix as well.

 

 

I can't find the other covers, but net flix Musashi Miyamoto's Samurai and I'm sure they'll all come up. Watch them all in order.

 

If you've never watched any of the Kurosawa flicks, they are the text book go to Samurai flick. All are good, one my favorites is:

 

 

A classic American attempt at mixing the East with the West:

 

 

 

 

 

This history of the Samurai is intense. The art of the sword is something most of us will never comprehend. The sword was mightier than the gun, until semi-automatic and fully automatic guns came around. When the gun was first introduced to Japan, it was the powder loaded type. So you'd take your shot, then you'd have to reload by dropping the bullet in and stuffing it with gun powder (or vice versa?). So the Emperors bought up all the crates and armed their men. The day of the battle, the Samurai charged, the men shot their loads (no/samurai homo), and as they reloaded the charging Samurai destroyed the line of defense like it was the Special Olympics track team fighting back.

 

After that, the gun disappeared. The arrow was much faster, and seeing that it was a skilled artform, more accurate.

 

Of course as military technology advanced, they couldn't compete. The Samurai is still carried on today though. I'd say all of the Yakuza stem from Samurai clans. That's the thing, it goes so much deeper than just swords, armor, and arrows. There was so much honor in the Samurai, but so much fucked up crooked shit.

 

I'm done nerding out.

[LexDiamonds]

One of my favorites:

 

 

 

It's not only the swordplay, but the cinematography and content. Sword of Doom is about a swordsman who focuses all of his negative chi into his sword, which is basically like an evil jedi master compared to Obi-One.

 

 

Golddddddddddd. This was my wallpaper for a while that photo in black and white.

 

http://wildgrounds.com/img/news/wp-sabredumal3.jpg

 

there it is right there.

[gasfacevictm]

I met these guys at a noodle stand in Tokyo.

 

 

They were goofy bastards.

 

 

As Earl stated...

Zatoichi is the shit!

The movies with Shintaro Katsu are the shit.

There are like 20+ of them.

Peepeth.

 

Also, Hanzo the Razor...penis flagellation, rice bale humping and rape turned love./nh

 

...and this

[earl broclo ESQ]

Samurai sword is designed to cut from the shoulder across the torso to the hip, with one swing. hence the metal and time it takes to make etc.

 

The sword design is definitely a big deal, but in reality it is the person who wields that shit. Bushido is so fucking insane. I've always wanted to start classes, but never put the money or motivation into it.

 

You're a New Yorker, you know of any good spots? I don't want to be taught some some guy that looks like Bobby Flay or Mario Batali.

[CityonSMASH]

i usually dont care to much for traditional style tattoo's. mostly because i find them an easy cop-out for anyone and there brother to just bite and put on anybody with money in there pockets.

 

those dudes are making me reconsider my stance, to some degree anyways.

 

shits baddass.

[earl broclo ESQ]

I also don't want to break anyone's heart --but there was so much homosexuality within the Samurai. Different time, different culture. I never knew about it until I saw this film:

 

 

 

Then I read up on it after watching the film, and I don't know if it was like a big gay bar or anything, but I read it wasn't uncommon especially among ranking officers and subordinates. There was a lot of shit based on power and submission, so it makes sense.

 

Just saying, they didn't have any "Don't ask, Don't tell" --and they were some of the baddest mother fucking homos to walk this earth.

[earl broclo ESQ]

you do not want to fuck with this guy.

 

I was hanging out with a Japanese friend of mine last night, and he told me he's got friends who are Yakuza. If I ever go to Japan, he said they'd definitely show me a really good time.

 

To be honest, I'd be shitting my pants hanging out with those guys. For some reason, the whole Lost in Translation meets Good Fellas doesn't sound like a safe bet.

[gasfacevictm]

Oh for sure there was.

 

It's kinda like how all those hard line Muslims in the middle east fuck young boys, but deny that anyone in the middle east is homosexual.

 

Or how all Koreans claim that homosexuality doesn't exist in Korea no matter how many gay bars you walk past during the conversation.

 

_________________________

 

Earl, I don't think there would be any problem hanging out with those guys your friend knows.

I think that most Yakuza nowadays are more along the lines of legit business born of organized crime.

Of course there are killers and all that, but I saw some show on how the whole structure has changed over the years and it's not nearly as insane as it used to be.

[earl broclo ESQ]

Hagakure --I have to correct myself. That's what I was reading on my shit breaks. Good call Gasface.

 

I have read parts of Sun Tzu's book, but Hagakure is what had more of an impact on me.

[CityonSMASH]

Koreans claim that homosexuality doesn't exist in Korea no matter how many gay bars you walk past during the conversation.

 

 

lol

[earl broclo ESQ]

Earl, I don't think there would be any problem hanging out with those guys your friend knows.

 

You've never seen me really drunk on sake.

[gasfacevictm]

Hagakure has a lot of great thoughts in it.

It's crazy that the guy who wrote it wanted it burned after his death because he believed that they were only his musings and beliefs and shouldn't really be pushed on others.

It's a great book though.

[LexDiamonds]

Hagakure --I have to correct myself. That's what I was reading on my shit breaks. Good call Gasface.

 

I have read parts of Sun Tzu's book, but Hagakure is what had more of an impact on me.

 

I have also read The Hagakure once before. Now I also read it while I take shits.

Along with a true crime book on Artie & Jim Mitchell the porn dudes.

I need new shitter reading material.

[paka]

Takeshi Kitano is one of my favorite film makers. Zatoichi was definitely a good flick. I also recommend Sonatine, Fireworks, Brother, and Kikujiro.

 

He's fucking hilarious in Kikujiro.

 

Word, I only picked up Zatoichi though cause it had Sonatine with it. Never even got around to watch it yet.

[freakeenyc]

zatoichi the early 60s version is fresh..and on hulu

 

also

HERE COMES A NEW CHALLENGER!!

 

[earl broclo ESQ]

Those aren't real ninjas. They're just a bunch of Columbian dudes posing with the shit they bought at a flea market. The photo is probably from 1983 when you could still get a butterfly knife on the street.

[earl broclo ESQ]

Word, I only picked up Zatoichi though cause it had Sonatine with it. Never even got around to watch it yet.

 

Sonatine is a Yakuza flick. The premise is Kitano's character and his men need to hide out, so they do so at an old desolate beach house in the middle of nowhere. So the movie is more character driven and how they all interact being stranded. I personally love that movie, but some don't like the slow pacing.

 

I used to have this exact poster hanging above the toilet in one of my old apartments.

 

 

It's actually a small narrow poster, and I had it put on a plaque board. It was what you stared at when you were pissing.

[the_gooch]

[earl broclo ESQ]

^^^Just like the Samurai, Judas Priest had a little gay in them as well.

[paka]

@ Earl: I meant that I didn't watch Zatoichi yet. Sonatine is one of my favorite all time flicks. Especially because it is (like you said) slow paced, and so different from any other gangster movie I saw before.

 

Thanks for the heads up though.

[gasfacevictm]

 

Yoshimitsu killing machine.

[bahleediddy]

sometimes samurai.

 

good one.

:lol::lol::lol::lol: