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Everything posted by Frate_Raper

  1. A few years ago I stole an airhorn from walmart, we drove around in boys car blasting it at people........I dropped the hammer on this dink in a mini van.He freaks out and starts chasing us,were laughing our asses off and driving a 5 series....he had no chance at getting close to us. BUT We decided to let him He starts yelling at me BUT Any time he would start to yell I'd blast the horn in his face, he freaked out!!!!!! I think I was like 24. Same summer we found out that I could turn the wind shield wiper jets on my truck to the side.....we'd hit red lights and clean my window aka spray people through an open window,cyclists etc
  2. thats not terrible.....thats fucking brilliant!
  3. Re: My semi retarded soon to be brother in-law no my friend, he walks very quickly,and like a bull....straight ahead sweating and not looking up. As stated before I've had reports of him talking to himself when he is upset and in rare form while walking down the street!
  4. Re: My semi retarded soon to be brother in-law WRRRROOONNNGGGGG Frank isn't allowed here,homies got a job,and lots of pork chops to see him through!
  5. Re: My semi retarded soon to be brother in-law I dont think I'll be getting any of those awesome Frank shots.I'll ask though...... Brew,no shirt sorry bra
  6. Re: My semi retarded soon to be brother in-law ALRIGGGGHHHHTTTTTTTT So wedding goes off with out a hitch.....Frank is being surprisingly cool,came to see me at the venue and shook my hand and talked a few mins....hes cracking jokes etc and its really cool! So it's photo time We found this old building to use, Wedding party is doing there thing and the photographer is talking about using this huge field as a back drop. We go and pose and as this is jumping off I notice a weird frank acting more weird then normal....he walks off.......but were in this shitty area thats vacant.....He sees us posing and is fully walking in the frame but hes so far off that hes in the photos no matter where he tries to run too......he then simply takes a piss. Photographer is like "why is that fucking sasquatch in these shoots" he showed me some of them and he looks like that infamous bigfoot photo. He later got into some petty argument on the party bus with a flower girl,he got so worked up he had a panic attack and dipped but not after shaking my hand with his sweaty meat wad of a hand while telling me a party is "not his scene"
  7. Who the fuck is sabot? i do love the chrome bite tho..............fagot
  8. Re: My semi retarded soon to be brother in-law Brew: we had to find something for him to do because he was upset over not being in the wedding party.......hes walking his mom down the isle,with his dad.......Were hoping he'd bring a hooker as a date. I will never eat or drink anything Franks been near........go back and read up about him making tang and stirring it with his hand.
  9. Re: My semi retarded soon to be brother in-law Frank does cook yes....... He only cooks hamburgers and hot dogs on the foreman,but he refuses to empty the grease catch he will let it over flow until his moms yells at hom over it.
  10. Re: My semi retarded soon to be brother in-law I went to use the can at the house the other night to find that Frank had dropped the biggest deuce I've ever seen,and then left it.like no flush odd thing was the lack of t.p
  11. Songs to dance with your mom at youre wedding........aka how many 2pacs we gunna see?
  12. Re: My semi retarded soon to be brother in-law It helps me to talk about it,it's a great way to cope.
  13. smash all but super fatty on yellow couch....
  14. i was gunna say smash the bottle and then smash her with the cut end?
  15. Re: My semi retarded soon to be brother in-law The ol boy looovvvves when the retard gets slapped around
  16. Re: My semi retarded soon to be brother in-law So Frank is freakishly strong, TARD STRENGTH, and he used to go ape shit at the other normal brother, until he learned that the younger bro is a fucking black belt in brazilian jiu jitsu and some other shit.....the kids tiny but is a trained killing machine. The younger bro being a rad dude wont totally fuck Frank up, he puts him in holds or just blocks his swings..........so one time many years ago my In-laws go on a trip. Frank calls my girl and I saying lil bros having a bender etc etc.......were like "SWEET,WHY WERENT WE INVITED".....Frank tells us hes going to call the cops. We show up and it's 5 dudes in a basement playing video games having some beers, keep in mind they are all 20 or so.......Lil brother wants to know why we showed up so quickly in a panic. I tell him and a small argument ensues.........words turn to shoves and the gloves are off. Franks tossing haymakers lil bros blocking them and then goes offffffffffffff starts open handed slapping Frank,whos sans shirt as per but is also in boxers.....as per, and it sounds like someone is slapping a side of beef. I'm laughing so hard I can't break it up and my girls yelling at me to get them to stop Finally i get lil bro off,he was in some fucked up leg lock choking bitch slapping move........Frank throws on some clothes and dips. Lil brother is laughing and tells me "that right there is why we call him fat head,slapping him is like slapping a waterbed...you should try it some time" I also watched Frank rush lil bro almost like a Curly from the three stooges,head down animal attack,he flipped his fat ass over his shoulder and damn near killed him.......the old man and I broke it up but I seriously thought he was going to piss himself laughing.
  17. Re: My semi retarded soon to be brother in-law Yes sir
  18. Re: My semi retarded soon to be brother in-law Alright just heard this recently........ Frank broke the toilet HOW? By dropping such a mother load they had to use a knife to cut it up to go down, he was so "ashamed" he refused to do anything.....the normal brother had to do it.He said he was gagging and almost cried.......the dad was yelling "hey fat ass you ate all this,come clean it up" obviously in pork chop!
  19. Re: My semi retarded soon to be brother in-law Frank saves that kind of formal attire for the classiest of events....such as funerals! So we had some serious family sit downs, our wedding is coming up....lots of lame family shit. the most recent was about money....so it's my girl,her mom and dad and myself sitting in there nice living room, you all know the one fancy 1960's euro furnishings covered in plastic!......This was a pretty private matter, I hate talking about money with people no matter what! So were shooting the shit and in walks fat ass,cat under one arm,bag of chips under the other and PINT GLASS of Crush. Sits down,turns on the tv cranks it up and starts laughing at like Law and Order.........and tossing out ideas about how we should spend this cash.......One idea was to "infest in stock markets" I'm like frozen in rage, my girls holding my arm and no one is saying a word.....sitting in silence for what seems like a life time, until her dad BLOWS THE FUCK UP...........Now I do not speak his mother tongue but whatever he said had Lard ass out the door and my girl cracking up.....she still wont repeat what her dad said. I want to know so badddddly
  20. A sailor you "work with" told you what?
  21. Re: My semi retarded soon to be brother in-law I cant express to you how bad this mans table manors are, like he himself is a weight loss program.I allllwayys get stuck seating near him and it I can't handle it.
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