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I punched Paul Bunyan in the arm and the impact shattered his shoulder after that I killed and ate his blue ox. I also made a couple lumberjacks cry and exposed a gang of uzi packin' ninjas for the faggots they are. You know guy shit.


I find this funny even though I posted it.

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ok so here it goes.



i walking outside my yard to feed my dog right, when i hear my dog crying like a lil bitch. my spider senses started going crazy, DANGER! DANGER! i felt it, all of the sudden , from the corner of my eye i see this magnificent creature. we stared deep into each others eyes for about a fraction of a second already knowing one of us was not going to see tomorrow.


thank god for the discovery channel and the croc hunter. the alligator rushed me but i managed to jump right over him and onto his back. i had him on a headlock and at this point he knew he was doomed. the alligator starts rolling and rolling all over my yard , at this point my family comes out and starts screaming at me "Stop it , rush stop" "stop you're hurting him" but i didnt listen, my instinct for survival wouldnt let me.


about 2 minutes into the rolling behind the alligator as it tried to break free from my grasp of death, i managed to get on my feet still holding this animal and body slamming it ufc style on the concrete where it went unconscious.


got a little bruces here and there but nothing serious. also i got alligator belts and boots coming soon.


and thats my story, zero cool your turn

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