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$360

"Oh Man, Why Am I Such A Moron?"....getting fired

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ok, so i got fired form my job today. stupid cooperate fuckers. i didnt pass a test that they gave everyone, so fucking wak. i was a server, and had to take mad written tests.

 

im sorry, i forgot that people put in orders in written form.stupid fuckers.

 

so. what are the reasons YOUVE been fired for?lets hear it

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my boss was like:

 

dicksface:so you didnt pass the test, than means that by policy, we have to let you go

 

$360:i worked the other day and did fine on the floor.

 

dickface:i know, but its policy

 

$360:so wait, youre going to get riid of a perfectly good server, because i didnt pass written test on things that are being taken off the menu

 

dickface:im sorry but here at the chessecake factory we have high standards.

 

$360: oh, ok.

 

dickface:im skeletor fuck me in the ass

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i got fired for being drunk on the job and not being clean shaven.

 

i wa fired from another job because i was accused of trying to steal the floor safe.

 

i was fired from another job cuz i got caught hustling the customers for extra money.

 

i was fired from another job for not showing up the first day of work. (Super Bowl=Fuck them)

 

:lol:

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Originally posted by mr.yuck

i got fired for being drunk on the job and not being clean shaven.

 

i wa fired from another job because i was accused of trying to steal the floor safe.

 

i was fired from another job cuz i got caught hustling the customers for extra money.

 

i was fired from another job for not showing up the first day of work. (Super Bowl=Fuck them)

 

:lol:

 

this is exactly the stuff i wanted to hear

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I was fired from one job for hustling customers (anywhere from $70-$250 a night)

 

I was fired from another for stealing all kinds of food/ goofing off four or five hours out of a nine hour shift (football, high impact warfare using various shit from the store, etc)

 

I was fired from another for not showing up (I habitually came in 15-30 minutes late, and just said "fuck 'em" after they gave me a talkin to)

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now that i thik about it, i sould have just stolen shit from the place. the problem was i was taking it all seriously.

 

stupid work ethic.

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hahaha this thread is great!! It mae methink of some shit that happend about 6 years ago. I worked at Franks Nursery and Crafts. I got in trouble after the haloween season when i was supposed to throw the old pumpkins away in the dumpster but i thought it would be a better idea to throw them on the roof of the store. We had a bird problem after that. There was shit everywhere.:lol:

 

I finally got fired around xmas when they caught me selling christmas trees out the back for $20 off the sticker price. What a great job.

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Guest 455

fuck work.work sucks.....start freeloading.

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oh shit mr.yuck!i dod a similar thing.

 

the last job i worked bought this hugh ass pumpkin for "holloween sperit". im talking to heavery to lift, in order to move it you had to get 2 or three people to roll it. rather than taking it out back and leaving it by the dumpster where it was supposed to be picked up, we had a better idea. the parking lot behind the place sloped down and lead into a big river. so, being the smart asses we were, we wanted to roll it into the river. only it didnt go straight like we thought it would, and it hit someones car and broke off a mirror.

 

soooo funny

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:lol: yeah fuck it, being an asshole is much more fun.

 

treat a bullshit job exactly for what it is and you will never be dissapointed or have a dull day

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I got fired from big boys cause instead of taking the trash out to the dumpster a friend and I loaded a days worth of big boys trash into a truck and dumped it all over this girl we didn't like's yard.

 

good times

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Originally posted by $360

dickface:im skeletor fuck me in the ass

 

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, that was some of the funniest shit ever.

 

yea, i've never had a job. so it's all good.:smiles:

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Ok so i got fired for bouncing a dollyhand truck thing up and down said it was unsafe and then riding on a flatbed like a skateboard. then i get fired for taking two weeks off on sick leave after i fuck up my back at work and i have doctors notes and they said they had to cut back hours on the whole store but i was the only one layed off fuck that company.

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I never got fired.

 

Originally posted by ARCEL

ahahahahaahah funny shit in this thread

$360 does it again!

 

[cockdance]$360[/cockdance]

 

:shook::shook::shook:

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i didnt get fired but i quit my job and start my new job on Aug 4th making $4.50 a more an hour........

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I didnt get hired once because on that stupid test

 

I filled out that taking a pen home from work was not really stealing and it was ok...

 

 

...Fuck Toys R Us anyway

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yeah. i also have managed to dodge being fired.

 

 

few years ago, go-kart track...i decide the boss is a dick and im just not going to come in and spend my days riding go-karts for free. so eventually he calls me:

 

 

boss: you know your supposed to be in right now?

 

 

me: *crunching cereal* (it was 2pm and i just woke up...eating cereal for breakfast.) oh?

 

 

boss: yeah. your supposed to be in right now.

 

 

me: shit.....*crunching*...yeah, well i really cant.

 

 

boss: you havent been in for two weeks already...(getting a tad angry at this point.)

 

 

me: yeah, i know, i was sick. (obviously, i was not sick.)

 

 

boss: so are you going to come in now?

 

 

long pause....

 

 

me: what?

 

 

boss: (now pretty angry...) are you coming in?

 

 

me: nah...i cant. i dont have a ride.

 

 

boss: *angry sigh* do you even WANT to work here?

 

 

me: *crunching* what?

 

 

boss: DO YOU EVEN WANT TO WORK HERE OR NOT?!?

 

 

me: meh.....

 

 

boss: "meh"?!?! what does that even MEAN?!?!?

 

 

me: i dont know.

 

 

boss: *more angry sigh's* ok. do you want to work here or not?

 

 

me: eh. nah.

 

 

boss: ok. so your quitting.

 

 

me: k.

 

 

boss: ok. fine. whatever. (about to hang up.)

 

 

me: oh....wait...

 

 

boss: what!?!

 

 

me: yeah, you guys owe me 40 bucks. can i come get that?

 

 

boss: when!!??!

 

 

me: (long pause...) now?

 

 

boss: YOU SAID YOU COULDNT COME IN TODAY!!!

 

 

me: oh........i did. ok....what about......tomorrow?

 

 

boss: whatever. fine. *click*

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

yeah so that was pretty fun.

 

 

 

 

 

 

my job now consists of me throwing a knife into a wall for a few hours and pretending to work on occasion. but its usually not much at all. the other people there just suck sooooooooooo badly that i look very good in comparison. i just got a 95/100 on my yearly review shit and a raise. and i do little/no actual work. i am amazing.

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