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Summer boredom

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by Fox Mulder, Jun 14, 2001.

  1. Fox Mulder

    Fox Mulder 12oz Loyalist

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    Summer boredom

    Discussion started by Fox Mulder - Jun 14, 2001

    fuck i am so bored, people give me some ideas on something i can do, I have no car,
    Where is a good place to get a job, just something, i'm going to go insane.
     
    Fox Mulder - Rank: 12oz Loyalist - Messages:
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  2. TOY

    TOY New Jack

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    TOY - Replied Jun 14, 2001

    i thought monkeys fuck for the fun of it too. but anyway, my summer boredom has set in and is going for the long haul. as funny as this may sound, i cant hardly wait for school to start back up.
     
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  3. platapie

    platapie Guest

    platapie - Replied Jun 14, 2001

    hahahahah. now this is a good post it started with sum1 wanting to no what the should do to kill bordom and now look. hahahahah
     
  4. cocaine & hookers

    cocaine & hookers New Jack

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    cocaine & hookers - Replied Jun 14, 2001

    that was hilarious.

    sorry molder, i don't have anything good to post. i'm drinking yuengling! does that help?? i'm not out painting?? any more?? ughhhhhhhhhh... i have way to many ny fats and not enough orange centers... hrmmmm. my montana was stolen with my friends car a few days ago. that's pretty shitty if you ask me. fuck the car, that paint is boss!
     
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  5. imported_SecretAgentX9 - Replied Jun 14, 2001

    fox, where you at?? do you really need a car?? get a bike man!!
     
  6. ubejinxed

    ubejinxed 12oz Veteran Member

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    ubejinxed - Replied Jun 15, 2001

    i thought this was funny. maybe inappropriate but funny:

    BLOWJOB ETIQUETTE (by a female))

    1. First and foremost, we are not obligated to do it.

    2. Extension to rule #1 - So if you get one, be grateful.

    3. I don't care WHAT they did in the porn video you saw, it is not standard practice to cum on someone's face.

    4. Extension to rule #3 - No, I DON'T have to swallow.

    5. My ears are NOT handles.

    6. Extension to rule #5 - do not push on the top of my head. Last I heard, deep throat had been done. And additionally, do you really WANT puke on your dick?

    7. I don't care HOW relaxed you get, it is NEVER OK to fart.

    8. Having my period does not mean that it's "hummer week" - get it through
    your head - I'm bloated and I feel like shit so no, I don't feel particularly obligated to blow you just because YOU can't have
    sex right now.

    9. Extension to #8 - "Blue Balls" might have worked on high school girls -if you're that desperate, go jerk off and leave me alone with my Midol.

    10. If I have to pause to remove a pubic hair from my teeth, don't tell me I've just "wrecked it" for you.

    11. Leaving me in bed while you go play video games immediately afterwards is highly inadvisable if you would like my behavior to be repeated in the future.

    12. If you like how we do it, it's probably best not to speculate about the origins of our talent. Just enjoy the moment and be happy that we're good at it. See also rule #2 about gratitude.

    13. No, it doesn't particularly taste good. And I don't care about the protein! n content.

    14. No, I will NOT do it while you watch TV.

    15. When you hear your friends complain about how they don't get blow jobs often enough, keep your mouth shut. It is inappropriate to either sympathize or brag.

    16. Just because "it's awake" when you get up does not mean I have to "kiss it good morning"


    A Man's thoughts on Fellatio aka Rebuttal Etiquette (by a male)

    1. First of all, yes you're obligated to do it. If you don't, we will find someone (younger, prettier and dirtier) who will.

    2. Second, swallowing a teaspoon full of cream is a hell of a lot easier than licking a dead fish.

    3. You want to talk about farting? Does the word "queef" mean anything to you?

    4. I will use your ears as I see fit. don't worry about it and be thankful I'm not pulling your hair.

    5. When you're on your period, stuffing something in your mouth is he only way to stop you from bitching and moaning. Suck it up!

    6. Speaking of which, if you are bleeding for five straight days, you need all the fluids you can get. trust me.

    7. You bitch about the taste, but trust me when I tell you that we get the short end of the stick in flavor country.

    8. At least there is no danger of a dick bleeding in your mouth.

    9. Play with the balls.

    10. No matter how good you think you are at it, we've had better.

    11. Caress the ass, too. We like that!

    12. Make hay when the sun shines. it's "wide awake" in the morning now, but when you get old & fat and looking for some action, I gah-ron-tee it'll be "sound asleep".

    13. If you swallow, then you don't have to worry about getting any on your face, now will you?


    sorry about that. i'm really bored


    ------------------
    high plains drifter
     
    ubejinxed - Rank: 12oz Veteran Member - Messages:
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  7. eyeBddub

    eyeBddub 12oz Member

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    eyeBddub - Replied Jun 15, 2001

    seriously
    go to mcdonalds and get sweet & sour sauce packets..
    then throw that shit at cars...
    fuck you have to be on your toes incase you nail a mean motherfucker but overall its worth it
     
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  8. Fox Mulder

    Fox Mulder 12oz Loyalist

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    Fox Mulder - Replied Jun 15, 2001

    wow, now only 705 minutes till sleep, so i can start it all over again.

    [This message has been edited by Fox Mulder (edited 06-14-2001).]
     
    Fox Mulder - Rank: 12oz Loyalist - Messages:
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  9. mental invalid

    mental invalid Dirty Dozen Crew

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    mental invalid - Replied Jun 15, 2001

    8. Having my period does not mean that it's "hummer week" - get it through
    your head -


    WHAT! DAM!...i thought that was automatic...it was the only good part of my gurl gettin her monthly 'friend'..shit...rOe
     
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  10. AeRoS0ul

    AeRoS0ul 12oz Member

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    AeRoS0ul - Replied Jun 15, 2001

    Hahahaha ! never heard that one.
     
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  11. ubejinxed

    ubejinxed 12oz Veteran Member

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    ubejinxed - Replied Jun 15, 2001

    and another long ass post to keep you bored kids busy.


    * In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the
    animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is
    punishable by death.
    (Like THAT makes sense.)

    * Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This
    also applies to undertakers; the sex organs of the deceased must be
    covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.

    (A brick??)

    *There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside
    and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex
    for the first time. Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden
    for virgins to marry.

    (Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the
    world that even comes close to this?)

    * In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her
    adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. The
    husband's lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.

    (Ah! Justice!)

    * Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in
    tropical fish stores.

    (But of course!)

    * In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the
    first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the
    act.

    (Makes one shudder at the thought.)

    * In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a
    woman and her daughter at the same time.

    (I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this
    law?)

    * In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with
    one exception: prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine
    only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on
    the premises."

    (Is this a great country or what?. Not as great as Guam!)

    * If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is
    produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.

    (Now that's more like it)

    * A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.

    (In my next life I want to be a pig)

    * Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

    (Still not over that pig thing)

    * Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

    (Is that why Flipper was always smiling?)

    * The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.

    (I won't touch THAT one!)

    * Some lions mate over 50 times a day.

    (In my next life I STILL want to be a pig ... quality over quantity)

    * Butterflies taste with their feet.

    (Ah, geez)

    * An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

    (I know some people like that.)

    * Starfish don't have brains.

    (I know some people like that too)

    After reading all these, all I can say is....... Damn Those Pigs.


    yes i am really really bored.


    ------------------
    high plains drifter
     
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  12. PIRone716

    PIRone716 12oz Member

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    PIRone716 - Replied Jun 15, 2001

     
    PIRone716 - Rank: 12oz Member - Messages:
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