probably would tend to the burns on my face first.. then reheat the fucker in the oven after getting back from the hospital
youd have no choice but to eat it anyway, because the pizza would otherwise defeat you.. at the same time, youd be eating (conquering) said pizza while being unable to think about anything else other than the fact that whether you won or not, youd still have to live looking like freddy krueger..
itd be the saddest pizza ever