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Everything posted by UPS!

  1. I couldn't let the tradition die before it's scheduled death somewhere right before the playoffs.
  2. UPS!

    Sex Addiction

    So...... we have a thread for the drunks and smack hounds(I mean that in the most loving way possible), but there are other forms of addiction. Alcoholism runs in my family, and I have had bouts with the bottle, but fortunately I have always managed to persevere without professional help. As far as drugs go, we all at least dabble at some point in our lives, but I have also managed to avoid any form of substance addiction. However, I have struggled for most of my post-adolescent life with sexual addiction. I'm not talking about beating my dick too many times a day or watching too much porn. What I ''suffer'' from on a daily basis is basically being consumed with around the clock sexual thoughts, urges and cravings that typically cannot be filled no matter how many times I get off. For a long time I thought sex addiction was made up, much the same way I thought drunkards blamed their habits on ''alcoholism as a disease''. Now that I am a bit older and a bit wiser I see that both are completely real things. There are a lot worse problems to have I know, believe me, but as comical as this might sound to some my sex drive is consuming a huge part of my life. Do any of my fellow Oonzters deal with anything similar?
  3. UPS!

    random thots

    I have a million dollar idea...how do I go about getting it done
  4. UPS!


    Smash the fuck out of this....I don't know why but I love girls who ''look'' like this. White trash or a black woman changed into a white woman, something about it. And smash the church mom to boot.
  5. Benching a 100 million dollar QB...welcome to the future of the NFL. I have never seen a QB who looks like they give less of a shit about the game than Jay... I use to fuck with ole dude the first few years because he had that anti-hero feel...now he's just a bum with a IDGAF demeanor. As I ranted, I have hardly watched any football in the last two weeks, doesn't look like I've been missing too much. Whoever is the #1 seed in the NFC(Seattle/Packers) vs. Patriots Superbowl.
  6. KeepItRail, brother you get the life-time achievement award from me. Although they managed to rustle me into the 9-5 life for the time being, i'm brushing up on skills and stashing cash so in the not too distant future I can take an adventure like yours. Safe travels and if you ever roll through VA, holler!
  7. UPS!


    Eh...that's a good one for the thread. To be safe I'm going to say strictly blowjob, but if she does it right I might say smash.
  8. UPS!

    What are you doing RIGHT NOW.

    Drinking coffee and waiting for this fine ass black girl to get her fine ass over here so I can smash. Also about to watch this Zombie short all my boys keep telling me about.
  9. UPS!

    random thots

    Yes, it's one of the greatest shows I've ever seen. It's 'smart' humor, but unless you still think wrestling is real you should get alot of enjoyment and laughs out of it. I agree 100%, 1-3 were great, then it fell off a cliff. I never watched it either other than the pilot. I thought it was garbage from square-1. That's crazy, glad to know that somebody out there feels me on this. I think alot of the humor went over people's heads, lets face it, people are fucking dumb. The best scene was the timewarp interview with Ben Franklin, Shakespeare, and Galileo.
  10. UPS!

    Is this it? Where will you go from here?

    Well I enjoyed that little ramble. Atleast you didn't run into a girl at the bar you use to bang only to find out she gained like 100 pounds.
  11. UPS!

    random thots

    Why did the Demetri Martin show only have two seasons, but Dexter and Lost had like 15.
  12. UPS!


    On the three young cooze, T-T-S(she looks like a girl I fucked in high school) Only a smash with the Canadian cooze if it's a two for one deal, otherwise, blowjobs and that's it.
  13. Welp, that's a wrap on the season, that was essentially already wrapped. When it was the Shithawks players, didn't they only get like 1-2 games? Another game, another 40 score...yay basketball...er...football!
  14. UPS!

    random thots

    Why do I always want to fuck my girlfriend's friends?
  15. UPS!


    Trash the Indian. Smash the Hipster Smash Beach chick, or atleast get head from her in a lawn chair while I hear the waves crash. Smash the fuck out of that golden oldie, I have already made my love for old pussy known but she looks ripe for the bone.
  16. There's nothing to rant about, I'm done watching football. I complain and bitch every Sunday about how the game is watered down and fixed and I'm finally going to stop bitchin and just stop watching. Literally all you have to do be successful in the NFL is to draft a QB who can throw the ball, and then have him throw it deep every down. He will either hit his target or you get at least 15 yards in penalties. That was the third game this year that a major penalty in the last minute cost us a game, and I'm fucking done with it. It doesn't matter what the Ravens do, they will make sure that they don't win. Football can suck my dick, I have better shit to do than watch a bunch of millionaire niggers throw a fucking ball around and dry hump each other.
  17. Yeah, Packers are going to the Superbowl if they get the 1 or 2 seed for sure. The system needs to be fixed for sure. When you have a team come in at the 4 seed and they get to host a game at home over a team that has twice as many wins, something is fucked up. Out of Seattle, 49ers, Dallas, Detroit someone is missing the playoffs, and the only team that is undeserving really is the 49ers right now.
  18. UPS!

    Sex Addiction

    I was doing ok for a week but I relapsed hard this week. How are you guys holding up? I love the feeling of sex(who doesn't right?) but man spending every second trying to get it can be cumbersome and un-fulfilling other than the hour you're in it.
  19. (My playoff seeding predictions) NFC 1. Packers 2. Eagles 3. Cardinals 4. Saints 5. Seattle 6. Detroit AFC 1. Patriots 2. Denver 3. Colts 4. Ravens 5. Bengals 6. Chiefs
  20. UPS!

    random thots

    Yo, I heard you choked at the shelter last night.
  21. Yeah this has been the most boring year of football I can remember and the Ravens are playing relatively well, it's just most games are non-competitive. Playoffs should be hella juicy though, the teams that are good are great, but everyone else is mediocre and awful. So many blowouts and one-sided affairs this season.
  22. All three games today sucked, surprise, surprise. The only good games I've seen in the last month were the Ravens-Saints and Giants-Cowboys. Football is fucking boring, other than the Patriots-Packers game and the Ravens game I think I'm going to start skipping out on football and do other shit until the playoffs. Kaep is hella overrated, dude is a borderline bum, I mean three points, on your own field, seriously?
  23. Jay Cutler is the new Tony Romo, dude is the antithesis of clutch. Lions are looking like a playoff team, I wouldn't be afraid if the Ravens faced them, but they definitely look like they could contend with any Wild card team. Hopefully the rest of today's games are cash, not ass.
  24. Yeah Collinworth and Gruden love to verbally suck players cocks... That Ravens-Saints game last night was magnificent, thrilling, nail-biting, and I'm super proud of the way the squad played last night. When the Ravens play all four quarters, they are nearly impossible to beat. There was some suspect ass calls in the first half, but great teams can overcome bullshit. The AFC is on notice, nobody wants Baltimore coming to town in January.
  25. UPS!

    Where shall the pheonix fly?

    That use to be my graffiti source until I found the 12...then I was ruined for life.