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Office Jobs....

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by hopeizm, Feb 17, 2005.

  1. hopeizm

    hopeizm Member

    Joined: Oct 3, 2003 Messages: 578 Likes Received: 1
    For the most part for me they are the shit..... I get to do almost what I want when I want, my hands arnt getting dirty doing what I do...blah blah blah...
    That was untill this morning.... My boss came over and gave me a set of forms to fill out.... we get diffrent forms every couple of months asking the most stupid fucking questions you can think of about our jobs.....


    What did I accomplish since our last discussion?...... what discussion?

    What feedback did my colleagues and my customers give me?..... I dont have any customers, I have a set workload...I get through it every day, if there was a problem im sure somone would tell me.

    How effective was I with respect to my job know how and *** ***** ****** Essentials?....... Was?....what you fucking mean was? Look if your thinking of getting rid of me just let me know...i'll walk before you kick me out.... Dont just try and give me nightmares becauses im spending too much time on 12oz these days?

    How did I "Inspire. Enthuse and Support" my customers?........ I dont have any customers (you sure I got the right fucking form you retard?)

    The rest is too tedious to type out............. Why do most office work places want to waste their time with this bullshit?
     
  2. Schnitzel

    Schnitzel Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Jan 16, 2004 Messages: 8,822 Likes Received: 386
    Goddamn your works sounds like mine...
    I feel for you.
    You've got a HR person with nothing to do I guess

    there must be some "stock answers to stupid office questionnaire's" site out there happy hunting!
     
  3. imported_b0b

    imported_b0b Guest

    Basically office do this cos they have crap managers and for some reason offices with crap staff never just say "sorry you are fired for being crap" instead they have all these initiatives and bollocks that some management consultant that they spent far too much money on suggested. It makes the boss feel happy as he gets to run the whole exercise and at the end he can call it a "success". Tick the right boxes, make up some lies and go along with the charade.
     
  4. HYDRO BILL

    HYDRO BILL Junior Member

    Joined: Jan 15, 2004 Messages: 159 Likes Received: 0
    OOOh I needed this thread right now
    My boss is straight out of Office Space with his shitty Boss Humour. Examples-----
    "This`ll keep you out of trouble"
    :yuck:
    "That oughta keep you busy"
    :clown2:
    "If I can`t find this file I`m holding you accountable"
    :huh2:
    "You`re going to be a busy boy tomorrow"
    :haha:
    Am I legally entitled to disembowel him with a stapler? Cause I REALLY want to.
    OH-OH AND he said I should be more concious of the clothes I wear while going in to work as the clients might not like it...(I wear a toque and my jacket because it`s cold to cover my shirt and tie on the way in to my office).
     
  5. hopeizm

    hopeizm Member

    Joined: Oct 3, 2003 Messages: 578 Likes Received: 1

    Only if you call a staff meeting first, do some research to see if its cost effective and go on a 2 day training course!
     
  6. colt45oe800

    colt45oe800 Member

    Joined: Feb 15, 2002 Messages: 828 Likes Received: 0
    Shit if i knew i was getting fired i would be more of a slacker,
    and wouldn't walk off the job, because if they fire you there is a
    great thing called UNEMPLOYMENT and i would gladly accept checks for nada

    *edited for: Oh yeah i just came here to say office jobs blow monkey zygotes
     
  7. deterrent

    deterrent Veteran Member

    Joined: Oct 20, 2004 Messages: 5,181 Likes Received: 43
    Every office job has several common factors.

    The good ones:

    •Fringe Benifits!!!
    •Down time while other member of th company review your work. (AKA
    time to spend on 12oz/ work on outside jobs.)
    •Never work on Week-ends

    The Bad ones:

    •Boring as fuck
    •Every thing is Rushed(often comprimising certian aspects of the job)
    •It's Bright
    •It's Quite
    •Got to wake up early
    •Got to be up on your sports to Bull-Shit with bosses (I hate sports)
     
  8. SteveAustin

    SteveAustin Veteran Member

    Joined: Mar 12, 2002 Messages: 7,042 Likes Received: 2
    can show up drunk off your ass...and as long as you look buys...no one gucks wiht you.

    brilliant.
     
  9. sneak

    sneak Guest

     
  10. T=E=A=S=E

    T=E=A=S=E Elite Member

    Joined: Mar 27, 2004 Messages: 3,271 Likes Received: 0
    the corporate world sucks.

    i used to think having an office job would be the best thing in the world, but its far from it.

    i mean, like most jobs, i have a love / hate relationship with my latest job. there are some really good points of it, such as beautiful women everywhere, benefits, lots of perks, fun work atmosphere, 5 minute drive from my house, pretty good pay for me not having a college degree, and tons of potential to improve and move up the food chain in the corporate world.

    some of the down sides are:

    they demand a lot out of you, you make your paycheck, and if you dont hit your numbers, you dont get paid hardly anything and that can get nerve racking. i feel like im on the fucking stock exchange floor in new york wheelin' and dealin' all day long. they add mandatory overtime hours whenever they want to, its hard to get a day off because it complete fucks up your month unless you use your paid vacation time, and our schedule is always changing every 2 months, so its hard to get a girl, let alone have a family, etc etc etc.

    i feel like a grain of sand in the middle of the dessert in my company to. its a very worthless feeling and im not fond of it.
     
  11. LaCosaNostra

    LaCosaNostra Senior Member

    Joined: Feb 3, 2004 Messages: 2,191 Likes Received: 0
  12. Dick Quickwood

    Dick Quickwood 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Aug 25, 2002 Messages: 14,783 Likes Received: 14

    i doubt quitting your job will make that go away
     
  13. Telo

    Telo Elite Member

    Joined: Jun 3, 2003 Messages: 4,164 Likes Received: 37
    haha.. arcel nails it...
     
  14. T=E=A=S=E

    T=E=A=S=E Elite Member

    Joined: Mar 27, 2004 Messages: 3,271 Likes Received: 0
    look at that, 3 faggots in a row, three posts about me, that arent even necessary.

    yall are some goofy little bitches straight up.
     
  15. decu goldyn1

    decu goldyn1 Senior Member

    Joined: Oct 24, 2001 Messages: 1,098 Likes Received: 1
    ^file under angers easily
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    office jobs:hateded it
    the few pros weren't enough to keep me
     
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