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I tried to dock in my sleep


Gunm

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No joke....

 

The other night I had this dream where I was trying to chow down on a tough sandwich but try as I might, i couldn;t get a bite off the damn thing.

 

Waking up, I'm standing in the doorway from my room into the kitchen.

 

"Huh....." I thought to myself, "...looks like I was on my way to the fridge. Shit i'm hungry. Fuck it, i can wait until breakfast.

 

Lens goes back to sleep and the usual dreams of exotic pussy, warfare, deforestation, facism, 12oz, and non-biodegradable Mcdonalds trash follow soon after.

 

Anyway, I wake up in the morning and on my way to shower....uh, wtf?!?!?!?

 

On my cutting board is a clean athletic sock....spread with mayonnaise and a piece of lettuce sitting next to it. There's a half-drinken glass of milk as well.

 

I have no recollection of having attempted to eat the sock but there are clear signs I had tried gnawing on it. The sock has since been retired as a rag.

 

:eek:

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Re: I tried to eat a sock in my sleep

 

This is no joke, no exaggeration, no lies, no embellishing.

 

 

I tried to eat a sock in my sleep people.....I don't know how else i can empahsize that

 

 

 

I tried to eat a sock

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Guest R@ndomH3ro

Re: I tried to eat a sock in my sleep

 

This is no joke, no exaggeration, no lies, no embellishing.

 

 

I tried to eat a sock in my sleep people.....I don't know how else i can empahsize that

 

 

 

I tried to eat a sock

 

 

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Lens almost ate a sock. Reminds me of the Simpsons episode where Homer was thinking of eating pancakes and was eating his pillow.

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Re: I tried to eat a sock in my sleep

 

oh sir you are the best!

 

Do you sleepwalk often?

 

yes.

 

there was another time I woke up in the bathroom dumping all my asprin into the pocket of my sweatpants.

 

My ex would always tell me I would talk in my sleep every other night.

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Guest nutsonmychin!

Re: I tried to eat a sock in my sleep

 

i sleep walk too. when i have been drinking.

 

it's pretty funny the shit you do.

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Re: I tried to eat a sock in my sleep

 

The lettuce and mayo were a nice touch.

 

I wouldn't have bothered with that, I would have eaten it plain... but you are giving me some ideas. A t-shirt on the counter would definitely freak my roommates out.

 

A few years ago, I got home from the bar, and wolfed down a brand new package of pepperoni and drank a half gallon of grapefruit juice. No big deal...but, I hate grapefruit juice, and I don't eat meat.

 

Strangely enough, I felt fine the next day.

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Guest spectr

Re: I tried to eat a sock in my sleep

 

was it a clean sock? i really hope it was a clean sock for your sake.

i once cooked cheese fries in my sleep i woke up eating them sitting in my bath tub.

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Re: I tried to eat a sock in my sleep

 

I can't post flicks

 

i.e. someone decided my digital camera was too much of a burden on my life so they decided to remove it from my car.

 

As for the sock...i didn't get any actual bites off but you can see where the seams were torn from my efforts

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