Kalashnikov
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Posts posted by Kalashnikov
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Just wanted to check in. Still opiate free, but still drinking on the weekends also. I won't lie, on Friday when I'm getting out of work I'm definitely looking forward to having a few drinks. Not sure if that's a problem yet. I figure so long as I'm not drinking during the week, I'll be alright, but who knows. Everyone's definition of "alcoholic" is different. As a former junkie, I consider addiction as NEEDING something. Physical need mostly, but mental too. I don't need to drink, but I do enjoy it. Maybe I'm just trying to hold onto my seemingly escaping youth by walking around the city with a beer and writing on shit with no plan other than that. God dammit, am I turning into DAO?
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I hated Boston when I went. Funny enough, Providence, although being much smaller, is a much better city. Not to mention plenty of painting spots.
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The best way (for me) to deal with insomnia is exercise, the evening after a hard swim I sleep through no problem. Failing that if I am looking for a aid I take benedryl, although I have heard that does not work for everyone.
Definitely. I've had insomnia problems for yeeeeears, but never put two and two together. I'd take diphenhydramine, try to drink myself to sleep, melatonin, etc. Some of it worked in the beginning but would always fail out after a few weeks. Started exercising, and that took care of it. Even exercising for 40 minutes or so is enough to knock me out that night.
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Bump those 2 SELOE & SHOUT collabs on last page, and that TRAGEK handstyle. Fresh!
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Sitting at work trying to not get distracted with the debauchery on the internet. Listening to a good mix on di.fm Trance channel though, if that's worth anything.
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Bumping this back up since it's been a while. Definitely RIP to POZ and Swords. Never met the former in real life but the latter was the homie. Just makes it sink in how real this shit actually is, it's all fun and games at first before addiction sets in.
Glad to see the updates on here though regardless, props to those of you who are still sober and much love to everyone who is still fighting and attempting.
The last time I posted here I was still using heroin and on methadone. I can proudly say now that I have been off both for a little over 2 years. Longest I've gone without doing drugs since I started doing drugs, definitely the longest I've been off heroin. Funny thing is, I have no desire to use anymore. Sure, I think about it some days, but it's not worth throwing away everything I've accumulated since I stopped using.
I will say though I'm not sober by NA/AA standards as I still drink, usually once or twice a week. I can't smoke weed anymore, for whatever reason the past like 5 times I tried, it just gave me panic attacks, so I said fuck it. I never really enjoyed it all that much anyways, it would always make me second guess everything I said.
I've been working, working out, that's about it. One thing I wanted to bring up was how I don't feel like I belong to the "normal" society. Like... I don't know how to really put it, kind of a strange feeling. I feel more at home with the addicts, the degenerates, whatever. Working a normal job and trying to meet healthy friends has proven tough, especially since I moved 1000 miles away. I was always good at finding other addicts, but when I meet new people (potential romantic interests especially) I just feel out of place. It doesn't help that dropping the, "I used to be a heroin addict" line on a girl I'm into is a huge bomb in itself. Anybody have thoughts or advice?
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guy in a button down and slacks is hilarious for some reason. "Excuse me, sir, might I interest you in the tale of wolf-whales?"
There's no need for him to spread the word, they teach it in school. Every 3rd grader knows this.
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Haven't been doing too great. Still on methadone, but have been using dope on top of it. One more dirty UA from getting 21-day detoxed. Severely depressed. Have been drinking every night since about April or so, minus a few nights here and there (including last night). Not satisfied with life right now in the least... fuck it though. Hope everybody is doing well!
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Man, I been following @DrakeTheTypee on Twitter for a minute. That shit always gets me cracking up. Some of my recent favorites:
Drake the type of nigga to go to jail and slam the soap on the shower floor.
Drake the type of nigga to ride a bike with his dog sitting in the basket on the front
Drake the type of nigga that gets carried to his room when he falls asleep in the car.
Drake the type of nigga to call OnStar for car trouble but end up talking about his trust issues
Drake the type of nigga to call a phone sex line and tell the girl to talk about her feelings
Drake the type of nigga to give the other driver his insurance info when he get in a wreck in gta
Drake the type of nigga that eat Doritos and makes his homie lick the cheese off his finger.
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YOU AIN'T BELIEVE ME 'CAUSE YOU DON'T BE GOING TO THE ZIMBABWE OF THE INTERNET
Where you can't fuckin' find no clean water and gotta sip on that elephant dung son
LOVE ME SOME FLEISCHMANNS AND ELE-DUNG MIXERS
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Found on/stolen from the Internet...
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THAT NIGGA GOO... PUTTIN OUT THAT STRAIGHT FIRE, up all over Riverwest! Shit should be in the fuckin' art museum!
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THAT MAUI JETSKI...!
WALDO
PAEBAK
HABET
PENPAL
YANK
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need money for dope baguettes. lugr did you take basically exactly what you wrote to me a few months ago and just change it from DB to whatever it is this thread is about?
You missed the joke.
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they should darken every wiki page, instead of just the homepage, who the fuck goes to the homepage?
Every page was darkened/inaccessible, around midnight last night. But for some reason they've decided to not go through with the blackout all day... which doesn't really make a point.
edit: Nevermind, it's still going on. Just the English Wikipedia (en.wikipedia.org)
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The shit is hitting the fan. I don't watch the televised news, are they covering this? My guess is probably not. The less people that know about it, the better for them. Fuck this country.
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Anybody know how sword is doing?
Not to put him on blast, I will say:
Truth. Honesty. Recovery.
:lol:
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lmao @ "with some buddies"
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have fun having diarrhea.
He's already having fun being a ginger.
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Sucks for the Dutch, and the people who run TPB if they really did get arrested. TPB is one of my favorite if not my favorite torrent site I've ever used. I've found lots of things on there that I haven't found on other sites or in stores, especially considering a lot of the music I listen to you'd never find in a store. /nohipster
Do not feel bad about downloading music, TV shows, or movies. br0s.
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Watched pretty much all his videos a couple years ago. Dude's funny.
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It's been awhile since I've posted in this thread so even though I'm not an alcoholic, I guess I can give an update. Stopped my multiple times daily IV heroin usage on December 11th... well actually the 12th, the 11th was the last day I used. Got a couple 8mg Suboxones and went from there. I've relapsed twice since I've "quit". Once on December 20th, the other on New Years Eve.
I don't know if it's the fact that I had Suboxone in me (works as an opiate blocker at higher doses- meaning you can do dope, but won't get high, so it's pointless) from days before, but each time I used, it was very unsatisfying. I was high for maybe a half hour tops, then back to normal. Wasn't worth it to me. I'm starting to get used to life without heroin, after years of being doped up all the time it's quite an adjustment. I will say that it seems I'm spending more time with my family and communicating better with them overall.
A lot of the friends I have use, and I know everyone says "you can't keep talking to using friends"- but it's hard, mostly because I've had these friends long before any of us even knew what heroin was, became junkies with them, and have stopped being junkies with them (well one of them at least). I have had drug acquaintances calling me, asking me if I can find them anything. I tell them that I'm clean, and then they ask "if I drive, will you go down there and get me a bag?". Really? You really expect me to go score dope for you, risk a felony, have to deal with the dopeman and his waiting games sitting on a hot block, so you can get high? And you're not even a friend- just a drug acquaintance? Fuckouttahere. At that point I tell them never to call me again. So far, it's worked.
Anyways, sorry for the long post. Hope everyone that is struggling finds that it's getting easier, or at least are making steps so that it's easier in the future. Keep at it.
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HOLY SHIT MAN NOT 1 BAG OF COKE A WEEK! YOU ARE TOTALLY A COKEHEAD NOW, BRO.
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DX-ING EVERYBODY!!!
(And not knowing what it meant)[/color]
I remember there were a couple kids at my school that would do this ALL THE TIME. I thought it was stupid in the first place (never got into the wrestling shit), and remember just thinking like "wow... getting old..."
⚠️ GAME: True or False
in Channel Zero
Posted
False. Definitely exercise but was never the sport playing type. Shit's boring to me.
TPBM has slept outside at least once this summer for any reason.