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Wrong number you dirty old fuck!

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by Ski Mask, Jun 12, 2003.

  1. Ski Mask

    Ski Mask 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Apr 11, 2000 Messages: 11,114 Likes Received: 209
    so I'm sitting at my desk doing paperwork.
    *phone rings*

    megabank, chris speaking.

    (old guy with a southern accent) uhh, hello. I believe since your address is in the yellow pages, I'd be able to come in and choose a girl?

    .........excuse me?


    yes. I SAID i believe since your adress is in the yellow pages, I'd be able to come in and choose a girl.

    I think you have the wrong number....this is A BANK.

    oh.....sorry.
    (hangs up)

    called back two minutes later. looks like my direct line is off one number from a rub and tug. suprised I haven't got more strange calls.
     
  2. vinyl junkie

    vinyl junkie Elite Member

    Joined: Jan 17, 2002 Messages: 4,725 Likes Received: 0
  3. Don't Panic

    Don't Panic Member

    Joined: Jun 2, 2003 Messages: 647 Likes Received: 0
  4. Dick Quickwood

    Dick Quickwood 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Aug 25, 2002 Messages: 14,783 Likes Received: 14
    megabank cheated me out of a thousand dollars, GIVE IT BACK !
     
  5. Ski Mask

    Ski Mask 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Apr 11, 2000 Messages: 11,114 Likes Received: 209
    you lie. your name came up in my pile of nsf cheques I had to file today about 20 times. shits like some kind of super rubber, it bounces faster than anything I've ever seen before. I should try and sell it to nasa...
     
  6. Dick Quickwood

    Dick Quickwood 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Aug 25, 2002 Messages: 14,783 Likes Received: 14
    seriously? does this mean you have my money ?


    it would have been funny to tell the guy yes, come right over. or try to get his credit card information hahahah
     
  7. Ski Mask

    Ski Mask 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Apr 11, 2000 Messages: 11,114 Likes Received: 209
    I have your worthless cheques. If I had your money I'd be home "sick" boozing it up with some strippers from across the street.
     
  8. Dick Quickwood

    Dick Quickwood 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Aug 25, 2002 Messages: 14,783 Likes Received: 14
    grrrrrr im so mad that i set fire to my own face :hatred:
     
  9. sneak

    sneak Guest

    or youve been pranked...
     
  10. --zeSto--

    --zeSto-- Veteran Member

    Joined: Jul 12, 2000 Messages: 6,979 Likes Received: 2
    oh man C...

    you missed a great chance for a prank!
    You could have told the guy to come on down and
    given him the directions to a nasty co-workers office.
    Imagine the hillarity!
     
  11. CRAMPS

    CRAMPS Senior Member

    Joined: Jun 6, 2003 Messages: 1,600 Likes Received: 0
    you should have been like (in a girly asian accent)"ooh me love you long time" 10 dalla, me do everything you want, love you long time 10 dalla"



    hahhahaa:king:
     
  12. KaBar

    KaBar Senior Member

    Joined: Oct 9, 2001 Messages: 1,397 Likes Received: 28
    Similar Story

    I used to work at a psychiatric hospital in Houston that had a telephone number that was one digit off from War--I mean, MegaGiant Cable TV. For some reason, whenever MegaGiant Cable would cut off service for non-payment, people would frequently mis-dial MegaGiant Cable's number and they would get our psychiatric unit. Usually it was a conversation that went:

    <ring>

    Me: "Unit One, Youth Services. This is Mr. Ka-Bar, may I help you?"

    Irate Caller: "YOU PEOPLE CUT OFF MY GODDAMN CABLE! I PAID THE BILL ON TIME, ASSHOLE! TURN IT BACK ON!"

    Me: "I'm sorry, sir, but you must be trying to reach MegaGiant Cable. This is a psychiatric hospital. Hang up, and re-dial."

    Irate Caller: "DON'T GIVE ME THAT SHIT, MOTHERFUCKER! TURN MY CABLE BACK ON! I'M GONNA COME DOWN THERE AND KICK YOUR WHITEBREAD ASS, BITCH!"

    Me: "Sir, you sound really angry and upset. This is a psychiatric hospital. Is there anything I can do to help?"

    Irate Caller: "YOU SORRY MOTHERFUCKER! AIN'T YOU LISTENING TO ANYTHING I SAY? TURN MY MOTHER FUCKING T.V. BACK ON!!!"

    Me: " All right sir. What's the problem?"

    Irate Caller: "I PAID FOR THIS FUCKING PAY-FOR-VIEW AND I WANT IT TURNED ON RIGHT FUCKING NOW!"

    Me: "Not a problem, Mister--what did you say your name was?"

    Irate Caller: "YOU KNOW! YOU GOT THAT GODDAM WHADDAYACALLIT, THAT PHONE TRACER! MY NAME IS JOHNSON!"

    Me: "Yes, of course, Mr. Johnson. Well, we have a MegaGiant Cable unit right in your neighborhood, and if you'll just go out by the street to flag him down, we'll have that premium pay-for-view and movie package turned back on immediately."

    Irate Caller: "That's better! Mother fuckers." <slams down phone>

    These idiots called up at least once a week. Some of the time, they actually listened, but most of the guys were so pissed off, they never even realized that they had dialed a wrong number. Sometimes we'd apologize profusely, and say shit like, "We are so sorry for the inconvenience, Mr. Jones. Can we offer you the full premium first-run movie package, absolutely free to you, to make up for this inconvenience? We can? Great. Okay, go out to the street, and wait for our service unit. He should be there in no more than fifteen minutes to hook it up, absolutely free of charge."
     
  13. cantbefaded

    cantbefaded Member

    Joined: May 29, 2003 Messages: 359 Likes Received: 0
    Hahaha, you were givin away free cable. They probably had to go along with it.
     
  14. Dick Quickwood

    Dick Quickwood 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Aug 25, 2002 Messages: 14,783 Likes Received: 14
    Re: Similar Story

    those are the bastards that took my check 2 months ago and still havent hooked up the fucking cable
     
  15. Dick Quickwood

    Dick Quickwood 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Aug 25, 2002 Messages: 14,783 Likes Received: 14
    OH SHIT I THINK I KNOW WHY THEY DIDNT HOOK UP THE CABLE !
     
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