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2 blaazed

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Posts posted by 2 blaazed

    Knitbats: Tease your hair, volume and shit...

    in Channel Zero

    Posted

    so i go to my old nieghborhood today and i came to find out a good friend of mine who i know since where we little kids got jumped a few months back and they sliced his throat and left him for dead...he pulled threw after bieng in a coma for a few days...he has the sickest fuckin scar...hes all bugged out now though...

    Knitbats: Tease your hair, volume and shit...

    in Channel Zero

    Posted

    my old apartment was ikea'd out...you could take a flick and put it in the magazine....well i went there for my new apartment and my friend came to get his shit....it fuckin sucked...nothing realy good....good prices though....but when my boy got his bed they didnt give him the sides of his bed (the most important part) and when he called and told them they made him pay another 75 bucks for it....basically ripped him off...so im on some "fuck ikea" shit right now.....

    Knitbats: Tease your hair, volume and shit...

    in Channel Zero

    Posted

    Lil niggahs are gettin gangster now a days...

     

    so my boy comes threw to my new place yesterday...so we figure will go walk to the store and grab some phillies....the store is quite a walk when it hits dark....so as we get to the block where the store is on. there are 2 id say bout 16 year old kids acting mad sketchy on the corner...so we walk by them cautiously to see if they try something stupid..they knew better.....then in front of the store there are about 8 other youngings and the guy who runs the store is screamin at them..so i get to the store and i see that they where trying to rob this kid in the store..so they all leave and wait on the other corner..so i grab my phillies and walk out the store...laughing at all these lil kids...and purposley said out loud "lil niggahz these days" so on the way back we remebered we had to get ciggarattes..so were walkin back to the store and we see the 2 kids still on the corner...next thing you know the kid who was gettin robbed runs out the store and runs right into the 2 kids...so they start beating him down...next thing you no the other 8 kids start running towards them...so they start beating this lil kid up...i felt real bad and wanted to do something...next thing you know they start chasing some other kid and his girl...so as the run by me i trip one of them...so this kid gets up like hes mad hard...and steps up to us and now all there attention is on us...i couldnt help but laugh...next thing you know they tryin to jack us...so my friend grabs his snapple bottle and smashes it against one of the kids heads knocking him out instantly...after that every single one of those kids bitched out and ran.....it was the funniest thing in the world....lil niggaz man :lol:

    Knitbats: Tease your hair, volume and shit...

    in Channel Zero

    Posted

    Ur lame dude..he didnt write them lyrics...they wads a remake of that fat bastards song..

     

    anyway....i have been moving this past week...dont get my cable modem till thursday(hopefully)...the new place is dope though...

     

    on saturday i got to go out for the first time since bieng out of rehab..i got fuckin recked....it felt good to drink and not have to take some drugs with them...more females seem to cling to me as well...all in all it was fun...got a few bitches to come back to my boys house for a all out orgy in the swimming pool...and yes the sex was great!!!

    Knitbats: Tease your hair, volume and shit...

    in Channel Zero

    Posted

    LAST ONE

     

    sweet17: Hi

    bloodninja: hello

    bloodninja: who is this?

    sweet17: just a someone?

    bloodninja: A someone I know?

    sweet17: nope

    bloodninja: Then why the hell are you bothering me?

    sweet17: well sorrrrrry

    sweet17: I just wanted to chat with you

    bloodninja: why?

    sweet17: nevermind your an jerk

    bloodninja: Hey wait a minute

    sweet17: yes?

    bloodninja: look I'm sorry. I'm just a little paranoid

    sweet17: paranoid?

    bloodninja: yes

    sweet17: of what?

    sweet17: me?

    bloodninja: No. I'm in hiding.

    sweet17: LOL

    bloodninja: Don't fucking laugh at me!

    bloodninja: This shit is serious!

    sweet17: What are you hiding from?

    bloodninja: The cops.

    sweet17: gimme a fucking break

    bloodninja: I'm serious.

    sweet17: I don't get it

    bloodninja: The cops are after me.

    sweet17: For what?

    bloodninja: I'm wanted in three states

    sweet17: For???

    bloodninja: It's kindof embarrasing.

    bloodninja: I had sex with a turkey.

    bloodninja: Hello?

    sweet17: You are fucking sick.

    bloodninja: Send me your picture.

    sweet17: why?

    bloodninja: so I know you aren't one of them.

    sweet17: One of what?

    bloodninja: The cops.

    sweet17: I'm not a cop i told you

    bloodninja: Then send me your picture.

    sweet17: hold on

    bloodninja: Hurry up.

    bloodninja: Are you there?

    bloodninja: fuck you, cop!

    sweet17: Hey sorry

    sweet17: I had to do something for my mom.

    bloodninja: I thought you were trying to find a picture to send to me.

    bloodninja: When really you were notifying the authorities.

    bloodninja: Weren't you!?

    sweet17: thats not it

    bloodninja: Then what?

    sweet17: I don't want to send you the picture cause I'm not pretty

    bloodninja: Most cops aren't

    sweet17: IM NOT A FUCKING COP YOU DICKSHIT!

    bloodninja: Then send me the picture.

    sweet17: fine. What's your e-mail?

    bloodninja: Just send it through here.

    sweet17: alright *PIC*

    sweet17: Did you get it?

    bloodninja: Hold on. I'm looking.

    sweet17: That was me back in may

    sweet17: I've lost weight since then.

    bloodninja: I hope so

    sweet17: what?!?

    sweet17: that hurt my feelings.

    bloodninja: Did it?

    sweet17: Yes. I'm not that much smaller than that now.

    bloodninja: Will it make you feel better if I send you my picture?

    sweet17: yes

    bloodninja: Alright let me find it.

    sweet17: kks

    bloodninja: Okay here it is. *PIC*

    sweet17: this isn't you.

    bloodninja: I'll be damned if it ain't!

    sweet17: You don't look like that.

    bloodninja: How the hell do you know?

    sweet17: cause your profile has another picture.

    bloodninja: The profile pic is a fake.

    bloodninja: I use it to hide from the cops.

    sweet17: You look like the Farm Fresh guy lol

    bloodninja: Well, you look like you ATE the Farm Fresh guy....

    bloodninja: Not to mention all the groceries.

    sweet17: Go fuck yourself

    bloodninja: I was going to until I saw that picture

    bloodninja: Now my unit won't get hard for a week.

    sweet17: I shouldn't have sent you that picture.

    sweet17: You've done nothing but slam me.

    sweet17: you hurt me.

    bloodninja: And calling me the Farm Fresh guy doesn't hurt me?

    sweet17: I thought you were bullcrapping me!

    bloodninja: Why would I do that?

    sweet17: I can't believe that cops are after you

    bloodninja: I can't believe Santa lets you sit on his lap..

    sweet17: FUCK YOU!!!

    bloodninja: You'd break both of his legs.

    sweet17: You're a fucking wanker!

    sweet17: I've been teased my whole life because of my weight

    sweet17: and you make fun of me when you don't even know me

    bloodninja: Ok. I'm sorry.

    sweet17: No you aren't

    bloodninja: You're right. I'm not.

    bloodninja: HAARRRRR!

    sweet17: I'm done with you

    bloodninja: Aww. I'm sorry.

    sweet17: I'm putting you on ignore

    bloodninja: Wait a sec

    bloodninja: We got off on the wrong foot.

    bloodninja: Wanna start over?

    sweet17: No

    bloodninja: I'll eat your kitty

    sweet17: You'll what?

    bloodninja: You heard me.

    bloodninja: I said I'd eat your kitty.

    sweet17: I thought you said you couldn't get it hard after seeing my picture

    bloodninja: Do I need a hard-on to eat your kitty?

    sweet17: I'd like to know that the man eating me out is excited yes

    bloodninja: Well I'm not like most men.

    bloodninja: I get excited in different ways.

    sweet17: Like what?

    bloodninja: Do you really wanna know?

    sweet17: I don't know

    bloodninja: You have to tell me yes or no.

    sweet17: I'm afraid to

    bloodninja: Why?

    sweet17: cause

    bloodninja: cause why?

    sweet17: well lets see

    sweet17: you say you have sex with turkeys. You call me fat. then you wanna eat me out

    sweet17: doesn't that seem strange to you?

    bloodninja: Nope

    sweet17: well its strange to me

    bloodninja: Fine. I won't do it if you don't want me to

    sweet17: I didn't say that

    bloodninja: So is that a yes?

    sweet17: I guess so.

    bloodninja: Ok. I need your help getting excited though.

    bloodninja: Are you willing?

    sweet17: What do you need me to do?

    bloodninja: I need you talk like a pirate.

    sweet17: ???

    bloodninja: When I start to go limp... you say "HARRRR!!!"

    bloodninja: ok?

    bloodninja: Hello?

    sweet17: You can't be serious

    bloodninja: Oh yes I am!

    bloodninja: It's my fantasy.

    sweet17: this is retarded

    bloodninja: Do you want it or not?

    sweet17: Yes I want it.

    bloodninja: Then you'll do it for me?

    sweet17: sure

    bloodninja: Ok. Here we go.

    bloodninja: I gently remove your panties and being to massage your thighs.

    bloodninja: You get really juicy thinking about my tounge brushing up against them

    bloodninja: I softly begin to tounge your wet kitty.

    bloodninja: I run my tounge up and down your smooth cunt.

    sweet17: mmmm yeah

    bloodninja: uh oh ...going limp.

    sweet17: Har

    bloodninja: You gotta do better than that!

    bloodninja: Your picture was really bad.

    sweet17: HARRRRRRRRRRRR

    bloodninja: Ahhhh. Much better. I feel your kitty get more moist with every stroke.

    bloodninja: I softly suck on your clit bringing it in and out of my mouth.

    bloodninja: Your juices run down my chin as your scent makes its way to my nose.

    bloodninja: I begin to feel empowered by your femininity.

    sweet17: mmmmmm you are good

    bloodninja: I feel your thighs tighten as I fuck harder

    bloodninja: going limp

    sweet17: HARRRRRRR

    bloodninja: Mmmm I grab your swelling buttocks in my hands.

    bloodninja: You begin to sway back and forth.

    bloodninja: going limp

    sweet17: this is stupid

    bloodninja: ...still limp

    bloodninja: Do it!

    sweet17: HARRRRRRRRRRRRR

    bloodninja: I turn you around to lick your asshole.

    bloodninja: I pry apart that battleship you call your ass.

    bloodninja: I see poo nuggets hanging from the hair around your ass.

    sweet17: WTF?!?!?

    bloodninja: They stink really bad.

    sweet17: OMG STOP!!!

    bloodninja: I start to get fed up with your ugly ass

    bloodninja: I tear off your wooden peg leg.

    bloodninja: I ram it up your ass.

    sweet17: YOURE A FUCKING PYSCHO!!

    bloodninja: Then I pour hot carmel over your head.

    bloodninja: And turn you into a fucking candy apple...

    bloodninja: I kick you in the face!

    sweet17: FUCK YOU DICKHEAD!!

    bloodninja: The celluloid from your cheeks hits the side of the cabin...

    bloodninja: Your parrot flys away.

    bloodninja: ...going limp again.

    bloodninja: Hello?

    bloodninja: Say it!

    bloodninja: HAARRRRRR!!!!!

    Knitbats: Tease your hair, volume and shit...

    in Channel Zero

    Posted

    bloodninja: Wanna cyber?

    DirtyKate: OK, but don't tell anybody ;-)

    DirtyKate: Who are you?

    bloodninja: I've got blond hair, blue eyes, I work out a lot

    bloodninja: And I have a part time job delivering for Papa John's in my Geo Storm.

    DirtyKate: You sound sexy.. I bet you want me in the back of your car..

    bloodninja: Maybe some other time. You should call up Papa John's and make an order

    DirtyKate: Haha! OK

    DirtyKate: Hello! I'd like an extra-EXTRA large pizza just dripping with sauce.

    bloodninja: Well, first they would say, "Hello, this is Papa John's, how may I help you", then they tell you the specials, and then you would make your order. So that's an X-Large. What toppings do you want?

    DirtyKate: I want everything, baby!

    bloodninja: Is this a delivery?

    DirtyKate: Umm...Yes

    DirtyKate: So you're bringing the pizza to my house now? Cause I'm home alone... and I think I'll take a shower...

    bloodninja: Good. It will take about fifteen minutes to cook, and then I'll drive to your house.

    **pause**

    DirtyKate: I'm almost finished with my shower... Hurry up!

    bloodninja: You can't hurry good pizza.

    bloodninja: I'm on my way now though

    **pause**

    DirtyKate: So you're at my front door now.

    bloodninja: How did you know?

    bloodninja: I knock but you can't hear me cause you're in the shower. So I let myself in, and walk inside. I put the pizza down on your coffee table.

    bloodninja: Are you ready to get nasty, baby? I'm as hot as a pizza oven

    DirtyKate: Oooohh yeah. I step out of the shower and I'm all wet and cold. Warm me up baby

    bloodninja: So you're still in the bathroom?

    DirtyKate: Yeah, I'm wrapping a towel around myself.

    bloodninja: I can no longer resist the pizza. I open the box and unzip my pants with my other hand. As I penetrate the gooey cheese, I moan in ecstacy. The mushrooms and Italian sausage are rough, but the sauce is deliciously soothing. I blow my load in seconds. As you leave the bathroom, I exit through the front door....

    DirtyKate: What the fuck?

    DirtyKate: You perverted piece of shit

    DirtyKate: fuck

    Knitbats: Tease your hair, volume and shit...

    in Channel Zero

    Posted

    ANOTHER FUNNY CYBER PRANK

     

    This one was good.

     

    bloodninja: Ok baby, we got to hurry, I don't know how long I can keep it ready for you.

    j_gurli3: thats ok. ok i'm a japanese schoolgirl, what r u.

    bloodninja: A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure.

    j_gurli3: haha, ok lets go.

    j_gurli3: i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck.

    bloodninja: I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory.

    j_gurli3: haha, ok, u know that turns me on.

    j_gurli3: i start unbuttoning ur shirt.

    bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't wear shirts.

    j_gurli3: No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it's just part of the game.

    bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't play games. They f*cking charge your ass.

    j_gurli3: stop, cmon be serious.

    bloodninja: It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.

    bloodninja: I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet.

    j_gurli3: thats it.

    bloodninja: Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn.

    bloodninja: Goddam am I hard now

     

    THIS GUY "BLOODNINJA" HAS GOT ALOT OF THEM

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