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Modesto 209


micahhawaii

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Hey guise, I'm feeling down....

 

for those of you that i told i don't think of it, i do. Everyday i think of it. It's always in my mind and never leaves. The other day i went to the dentist and they told me they couldn't work on me because my teeth are rotting out from behind my braces and they told me that i need to see a petradontist so i could get dentures. I started yelling at him cuz he made me mad and i couldn't take it. Then as my grandma was pulling my arm to leave i yelled out at he entire office "thanx for telling me this, it makes me feel so good that i'm going to go home and slit my throat." I wonder how they felt. I like making people feel the way that i feel.MAD,angry on the inside(cuz as any one knows im happy(on the outside)),SAD,HATED,WARPED,NOTHING. Matter of fact. I am nothing, a shell of an adult wanting to be a kid, not wanting to grow up and deal with the bullshit of the world. I hide myself from everyone, i let people know what i want them to know, less than even a quarter of what i am is what people know about me. I HAVE PROBLEMS. I DO. I THINK OF SUICIDE EVERYDAY, as a way to get away from all the bullshit. Yea there are positives in my life not as many as i would like and not as many as the negative things. People in my life are nothing to me. Friends, in actuallity how many of them would do shit for me?NONE. Fuck what you say. I know the truth, as do you.

 

The best part of my day is from 12:30pm-7:30am, the time when i don't have to listen to NOBODY cuz i'm up and they're sleeping. Most of this time i go out and walk and think and listen to my ipod yelling the lyrics of Lamb Of God,Slipknot,I.C.P.,Twizted,Sacred Reich,and Dark Lotus among others. I'm free during these few hours of time and its always my favorite part of the day.

 

I have no way to show LOVE. No one to express myself to.Wish i did.Everyday.I used to think i could not do it but now it seems as if it would be easier, rather than to live a boring,cruel life. Cruel, as i wrote that word on the paper before i typed this, a tear came to my eye and it's hard for me to admit that. I have trouble crying alone or not. I don't like to express myself that way.

 

Everything that happens to me i keep it all bottled up inside.8 years of SHiT. It has been 8 strait years of downhilledness since junior high. People say it feels good to get it out but to me it just seems as if letting you know more than i want you to and that i shouldn't because it makes people worry.

 

Post.Script.This is the most serious thing iv wrote in two years. Be happy not sad,mad,angry like me.

 

cry me a river, build a bridge and get over it....

you should probably rush building the bridge, so hopefully it caves in and you die..

 

just my two pennies.

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Hey guise, I'm feeling down....

 

for those of you that i told i don't think of it, i do. Everyday i think of it. It's always in my mind and never leaves. The other day i went to the dentist and they told me they couldn't work on me because my teeth are rotting out from behind my braces and they told me that i need to see a petradontist so i could get dentures. I started yelling at him cuz he made me mad and i couldn't take it. Then as my grandma was pulling my arm to leave i yelled out at he entire office "thanx for telling me this, it makes me feel so good that i'm going to go home and slit my throat." I wonder how they felt. I like making people feel the way that i feel.MAD,angry on the inside(cuz as any one knows im happy(on the outside)),SAD,HATED,WARPED,NOTHING. Matter of fact. I am nothing, a shell of an adult wanting to be a kid, not wanting to grow up and deal with the bullshit of the world. I hide myself from everyone, i let people know what i want them to know, less than even a quarter of what i am is what people know about me. I HAVE PROBLEMS. I DO. I THINK OF SUICIDE EVERYDAY, as a way to get away from all the bullshit. Yea there are positives in my life not as many as i would like and not as many as the negative things. People in my life are nothing to me. Friends, in actuallity how many of them would do shit for me?NONE. Fuck what you say. I know the truth, as do you.

 

The best part of my day is from 12:30pm-7:30am, the time when i don't have to listen to NOBODY cuz i'm up and they're sleeping. Most of this time i go out and walk and think and listen to my ipod yelling the lyrics of Lamb Of God,Slipknot,I.C.P.,Twizted,Sacred Reich,and Dark Lotus among others. I'm free during these few hours of time and its always my favorite part of the day.

 

I have no way to show LOVE. No one to express myself to.Wish i did.Everyday.I used to think i could not do it but now it seems as if it would be easier, rather than to live a boring,cruel life. Cruel, as i wrote that word on the paper before i typed this, a tear came to my eye and it's hard for me to admit that. I have trouble crying alone or not. I don't like to express myself that way.

 

Everything that happens to me i keep it all bottled up inside.8 years of SHiT. It has been 8 strait years of downhilledness since junior high. People say it feels good to get it out but to me it just seems as if letting you know more than i want you to and that i shouldn't because it makes people worry.

 

Post.Script.This is the most serious thing iv wrote in two years. Be happy not sad,mad,angry like me.

 

thats fucked up i kno who its about and you shouldnt be talkn shit i kno this aint you softy

its raket(daler) chillen at your pad talkn hella shit about someone like always

you really really shouldnt

i didnt like sein you raket(daler) your an asss

stop popn up in my life bum

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thats fucked up i kno who its about and you shouldnt be talkn shit i kno this aint you softy

its raket(daler) chillen at your pad talkn hella shit about someone like always

you really really shouldnt

i didnt like sein you raket(daler) your an asss

stop popn up in my life bum

 

if you dont say your sorry im gonna put you on blast so hard.

 

shouldnt say such bad things about leaky man thats your boy.

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ALL OF YOU FY GUYS ARE QUEERS.(clem is cew) rowsdower just kill yourself like we gives afuck.. im dead serious just doit. Let me be your motivation, hell, ingrave that in you tombstone.

 

its no way a graff thing trust me but you tight jean wearin fools need to grow some balls and shut up for once. for someone people that dont put in work you have alot to say. (dale)

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shut up bitch or ill write on your house again

why are you getting into this. when i all i did was call out your boy clemy forbad mouthing you when he kicks it with me and then when hes with you bad mouths me....

 

pretty shady.

 

you dont have to always act tough now especially when no one else is saying anything bad about you.

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why are you getting into this. when i all i did was call out your boy clemy forbad mouthing you when he kicks it with me and then when hes with you bad mouths me....

 

pretty shady.

 

you dont have to always act tough now especially when no one else is saying anything bad about you.

 

like when i ran up when you were with your 5 friends? haha

 

quit tryin to be my friend and let it be bitch

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