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Zack Morris


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Kaiju Big Battel News Flash 2/19/03


Kaiju + Kimmel = Big Battel! Ever since New Year's Eve's First Fight Out, tensions in the world of Kaiju Big Battel have been steadily rising. This crisis reached its high point this past week when the Kaiju Commissioner raised the official Danger level in the United States to Most Danger. Ever since, the nation has been gripped by the fear that a city-crushing monster conflict may break out in their backyard. Now, in an effort to alleviate the panic, the Commissioner has scheduled an emergency Battel for this coming Thursday in Los Angeles. While details of the planned Battel are sketchy at best, this much is known: Gomi-man of Dr. Cube's Posse and Kaiju Rogues Kung Fu-Chicken Noodle and Unibouzu are currently loose in the Hollywood Hills, and Kaiju Champion Silver Potato is on his way West to protect the City of Angels from this trio of demons.


Faced with this imminent confrontation, the Commissioner had no choice but to dispatch Referee Jingi and announcer Louden Noxious, and schedule this Battel. But the Commissioner knew that in order to convince an anxious nation that the threat was being met, the Battel would have to be shown to all. So the Commissioner has forgone the usual multi-million dollar pay-per-view payout, and has instead arranged for this Battel to be shown live on broadcast television. Thanks to the new late-night phenom Jimmy Kimmel, the Battel will be shown to millions nationwide on the Jimmy Kimmel Live show. So tune in your sets to ABC on Thursday night at 12:05/11:05c to catch all the monster mayhem as Kaiju Big Battel explodes onto the small screen!

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