JURY DUTY

[Remi Martin]

^ bitch, act like you know.

[Guest JURY DUTY]

IM IN A POSITION OF POWER WHILE YOU ARE OUT FINDING WAYS TO VIOLATE YOUR PROBATION.

ARGUING WITH ME DOESNT MAKE YOU ANY MONEY. SOUNDS LIKE YOU ARE GOING TO NEED SOME TO PAY YOUR LAWYER FEES.

I KNOW A FEW GOOD LAWYERS BUT YOU WILL NEED TO PAY MORE THAN A WEEKS WORTH OF BUS FARE THAT YOUR MOM GIVES YOU.

 

STOP STEALING SPRAY PAINT FROM YOUR DAD'S GARAGE AND GO TO SCHOOL. I FIGURE IM GOING TO HAVE TO PAY FOR YOUR SCHOOL OR YOUR PRISON WITH MY TAX DOLLARS ID RATHER SEE YOU GET AN EDUCATION.

[When]

i have to go to court in 3 hours, yea for me

[Remi Martin]

Originally posted by JURY DUTY

IM BENT OVER WITH MY WIFE AND HER STRAP ON IN A ASS RAMMING POSITION OF POWER WHILE YOU ARE OUT FINDING NEW WAYS TO VIOLATE MY DAUGHTER.

 

ARGUING WITH ME DOESNT MAKE YOU ANY MONEY SO MAYBE YOU SHOULD WHORE YOUR BODY ON THE INTERNET LIKE I DO FOR GAY AMERICA . SOUNDS LIKE YOU ARE GOING TO NEED SOME TO PAY YOUR LAWYER FEES WHEN MY DAUGHTER SLAMS YOU WITH A PATERNITY LAWSUIT.

I KNOW A FEW GOOD LAWYERS BUT YOU WILL NEED TO PAY MORE THAN A WEEKS WORTH OF BUS FARE THAT YOUR MOM GIVES YOU WHICH IS ABOUT WHAT I MAKE BLOWING CRACKHEADS.

 

STOP STEALING SPRAY PAINT FROM YOUR DAD'S GARAGE AND GO TO SCHOOL. I FIGURE IM GOING TO HAVE TO PAY FOR YOUR SCHOOL OR YOUR PRISON WITH MY TAX DOLLARS ID RATHER SEE YOU GET AN EDUCATION.

[KaBar]

Real Jury Duty

 

Hey, earlier this week I actually got called for jury duty, for real. I was so annoyed, BUT, I do believe every citizen has the obligation to satisfy his civic duty. I am not an anarchist any more, although I am a sort of Libertarian-leaning Republican. Anyway, I went down to the jury room, with my subpoena, and it took like three hours to get sent up to a "jury panel". That's a group of people that could be chosen to actually make up a jury, during Voir Dire. They made us fill out questionaires, then the two attorneys (the defense attorney and the Assistant D.A.) asked us a bunch of questions. I was doing my best to make myself unattractive to both sides, cause I didn't want to be on a jury, but it didn't work. I got picked anyway. Another guy, who was a Libertarian activist, told them he was all for legalizing every drug, and he got excused.

 

It was a juvenile case--a 14-year-old black kid was accused of possessing cocaine (crack rocks) of more than 1 gram, but less than 4 grams. Basically, the cops got a tip about narcotics being sold at this abandoned house. They rolled up with a bunch of squad cars, the kids yelled "It's the police!" and they all ran different directions. The cops chased these two over a fence, then the kids lost them, running to an apartment project. The cops went to the back fence of the apartments, hopped the fence, and caught these two guys hiding up on the second-story balcony, laying down. They arrested them, cuffed them, brought them back to the car, and took them back to the original scene, where they searched them and supposedly found crack cocaine on both kids. Supposedly, the guy we were trying had 1.6 grams of crack rocks in a little plastic bag in a Newport cigarette box in his pocket.

After the first day, I was thinking "This kid's goose is cooked." He looked pissed off and guilty as hell, and the cop that testified was very emphatic--"That's the kid, right there, that I took the crack from."

But the second day, three other cops testified and THEY ALL HAD DIFFERENT STORIES. Shit! I couldn't believe their testimony had such major discrepancies.

Here's the cool thing about the American judicial system. All of the jurors but three were white. We had one black guy( a teacher,) and two Hispanic moms, both of whom hate gangs and gangbangers with a burning passion. That first day, the jury looked ready to hang the kid. But when the cops' stories didn't match, we all went "Whoa! Wait a minute."

THE STATE HAS THE BURDEN OF PROOF. The accused is INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY. We were about ready to send the kid to TYC, but the State did not prove it's case. We all voted "not guilty" (well, in a juvenile case, it's "Did Not" engage in delinquent conduct.) The kid's Mom burst into tears. The look on the kid's face was priceless. I think he was guilty as charged, but the State screwed up, so we bounced him. He and his mother came out into the hallway while we were getting our "excused from work" jury duty letters, to shake hands and thank us. I told him, "Good luck, son. The State has the burden of proof, but you need to change the way you are living your life." He looked at me and said, "Yes sir. I know." I hope he does.

We saw the cops at the elevators. I looked at the one we believed the most and said "What do you think?" He shrugged, and said "He'll be back." Damn. I hope not.