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SANTA CRUZ , CALIFORNIA...BILLS WHEELS


T.J-LAZER

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I ARE 12 AND WHAT IS THIS? PEOPLE ARE SUPPORT AN INTERWEBSITE ABOUT THE GRAFFITI? ARENT THIS GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT UNDERCOVER COPS, TRASH TALK AND BEEF? POSTING EVIDENCE NOT SMART. I AM DISSAPOINT THAT PEOPLE ARE SUPPORT SUCH TRASH. STUPID RETARDS MAKE ME WANT PUKE IN MY PANTS. GO AN HERO UR SELFS NEWFAGS. I HEARD THAT GRAFFITI IS FOR THE STREETS AND NOT "GRAFFSPACE". WHY ARE PEOPLE MAKE PRETTY ART ON WALLS? ARE WALLS FOR CRUSHING I THOT. NEWFAGS NEWFAGS NEWFAGS GO AN HERO.

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I ARE 12 AND WHAT IS THIS? PEOPLE ARE SUPPORT AN INTERWEBSITE ABOUT THE GRAFFITI? ARENT THIS GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT UNDERCOVER COPS, TRASH TALK AND BEEF? POSTING EVIDENCE NOT SMART. I AM DISSAPOINT THAT PEOPLE ARE SUPPORT SUCH TRASH. STUPID RETARDS MAKE ME WANT PUKE IN MY PANTS. GO AN HERO UR SELFS NEWFAGS. I HEARD THAT GRAFFITI IS FOR THE STREETS AND NOT "GRAFFSPACE". WHY ARE PEOPLE MAKE PRETTY ART ON WALLS? ARE WALLS FOR CRUSHING I THOT. NEWFAGS NEWFAGS NEWFAGS GO AN HERO.

gtfo my oz

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I know there's a reason you're forcing a smile

You hide what you're feeling and you have for a while

I can tell that you're falling

And you feel that you can't go on

But a new day is calling

And you'll see that the feeling is gone

 

[CHORUS:]

You know you're not the only one

Who has a lot to overcome

And when the time has come then you move on

'Cause you've been crying for too long

Sometimes life is so unkind

But change is never a waste of time

 

I know how you're feeling, I've been there before

The hurting is something much to strong to ignore

Don't be waiting for someone

Who can take all your fear away

When there's no one to listen

That is when you should not be afraid

 

[CHORUS]

 

But change is never a waste... it's never a waste of time

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I am a man as a man I've been told

Bacon is brought to the house in this mold

Born of your bellies I yearn for the cord

Years I have groveled repentance ignored

 

And I have been blamed

And I have repented

I'm working my way toward our union mended

 

I am man who has grown from a son

Been crucified by enraged women

I am son who was raised by such men

I'm often reminded of the fools I'm among

 

And I have been shamed

And I have relented

I'm working my way toward our union mended

And I have been shamed

And I have repented

I'm working my way toward our union mended

 

we don't fare well with endless reprimands and

we don't do well with a life served as a sentence and

this won't work well if you're hell bent on your offence

I am a man who understands your resistance

 

I am a man who still does what he can

to dispel our archaic reputation

I am a man who has heard all he can

cuz I don't fare well with endless punishment

 

Cuz I have been blamed and I have repented

I'm working my way toward our union mended

And we have been blamed and we have repented

I'm working my way toward our union mended

 

we don't fare well with endless reprimands and

we don't do well with a life served as a sentence and

this won't work well if you're hell bent on your offence

I am a man who understands your resistance

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An old man turned ninety-eight

He won the lottery and died the next day

It's a black fly in your Chardonnay

It's a death row pardon two minutes too late

And isn't it ironic...dontcha think

 

It's like rain on your wedding day

It's a free ride when you've already paid

It's the good advice that you just didn't take

Who would've thought...it figures

 

Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly

He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids goodbye

He waited his whole damn life to take that flight

And as the plane crashed down he thought

"Well isn't this nice..."

And isn't it ironic...dontcha think

 

It's like rain on your wedding day

It's a free ride when you've already paid

It's the good advice that you just didn't take

Who would've thought...it figures

 

Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you

When you think everything's okay and everything's going right

And life has a funny way of helping you out when

You think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up

In your face

 

A traffic jam when you're already late

A no-smoking sign on your cigarette break

It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife

It's meeting the man of my dreams

And then meeting his beautiful wife

And isn't it ironic...dontcha think

A little too ironic...and yeah I really do think...

 

It's like rain on your wedding day

It's a free ride when you've already paid

It's the good advice that you just didn't take

Who would've thought...it figures

 

Life has a funny way of sneaking up on you

Life has a funny, funny way of helping you out

Helping you out

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I want you to know, that I'm happy for you

I wish nothing but the best for you both

An older version of me

Is she perverted like me

Would she go down on you in a theatre

Does she speak eloquently

And would she have your baby

I'm sure she'd make a really excellent mother

 

Cause the love that you gave that we made wasn't able

To make it enough for you to be open wide, no

And every time you speak her name

Does she know how you told me you'd hold me

Until you died, till you died

But you're still alive

 

And I'm here to remind you

Of the mess you left when you went away

It's not fair to deny me

Of the cross I bear that you gave to me

You, you, you oughta know

 

You seem very well, things look peaceful

I'm not quite as well, I thought you should know

Did you forget about me Mr. Duplicity

I hate to bug you in the middle of dinner

It was a slap in the face how quickly I was replaced

Are you thinking of me when you fuck her

 

Cause the love that you gave that we made wasn't able

To make it enough for you to be open wide, no

And every time you speak her name

Does she know how you told me you'd hold me

Until you died, til you died

But you're still alive

 

And I'm here to remind you

Of the mess you left when you went away

It's not fair to deny me

Of the cross I bear that you gave to me

You, you, you oughta know

 

Cause the joke that you laid on the bed that was me

And I'm not gonna fade

As soon as you close your eyes and you know it

And every time I scratch my nails down someone else's back

I hope you feel it...well can you feel it

 

And I'm here to remind you

Of the mess you left when you went away

It's not fair to deny me

Of the cross I bear that you gave to me

You, you, you oughta know

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A downtown cafe Saturday evenin' and the

place is about to be closed I'm meeting my baby

yeah and order my hundreath cup of coffee today

My hands are shakin'

 

At half past seven I'm sittin here waitin' for

my boy all alone for too long It's after eleven

yeah I'm tired of waitin' and I'm gonna go home

cause I don't need this

 

You never think twice before you break all the rules

you gotta be crazy if you think I'm a fool

 

[CHORUS:]

I'll walk away and say good bye

If you don't want me anymore

I've bot my pride

I'll walk away and say good bye

if I don't get the love we had before

not satisfied

 

He finally gets here I'm waitin' for him to ask me

why there's a frown on my face He orders a

cold beer he has an excuse about his car

breakin' down but I don't buy it

You're givin' me sometin' I don't need anymore

Just gimme the word and I'll be slammin' the door

 

[CHORUS]

 

His best intentians are never the same as what

he does of the end of the day. I'm feelin' the

tension yeah Don't gimme no reasons cause you

don't comprehend what am I feelin'

You never think twice before you break all the rules

You gotta be crazy if you think I'm a fool

You're givin' me somethin' I don't need anymore

Just gimme the word and I'll be slammin' the door

 

[CHORUS]

 

So tell me now Just say the word

It won't be long

I'll be long long gone...

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you hadn't seen your father in such a long time

he died in the arms of his lover how dare he

your mother never left the house

she never married anyone else you took it upon yourself to console her

 

you reminded her so much of your father

so you were banished and you wonder why you're so hypersensitive

and why you can't trust anyone but us

but then how can I begin to forgive her so many years under bridges with dirty water

she was foolish and selfish and cowardly if you ask me

 

I don't know where to begin in all of my 50 odd years

I have been silently suffering and adapting perpetuating and enduring

who are you younger generation to tell me that I have unresolved problems

not many examples of fruits of this type of excruciating labour

 

how can you just throw words around like grieve and heal and mourn

I feel fine we may not have been born as awake as you were

it was much harder in those days we had paper routes uphill both ways

we went from school to a job to a wife to instant parenthood

 

I walked into his office I felt so self-conscious on the couch

he was sitting down across from me he was writing down his hypothesis I don't know

i've got a loving supportive wife who doesn't know how involved she should get

you say his interjecting was him just calling me on my shit?

 

just the other day my sweet daughter I was driving past 203 I walked up the stairs in my mind's eye

I remember how they would creak loudly

she was only responsive with a drink he was only responsive by photo

I was only trying to be the best big brother I could

 

i've walked sometimes confused sometimes ready to crack open wide

sometimes indignant sometimes raw

can you imagine I pay him 75 dollars an hour sometimes

it feels like highway robbery

and sometimes it's peanuts

I wish it could last a couple more hours

 

so here we both are battling similar demons (not coincidentally)

you see n getting beyond knowing it solely intellectually you're not relinquishing your majestry

you are wise you are warm you are courageous you are big

and I love you more now than I ever have in my whole life

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how bout getting off these antibiotics

how bout stopping eating when I'm full up

how bout them transparent dangling carrots

how bout that ever elusive kudo

 

thank you india

thank you terror

thank you disillusionment

thank you frailty

thank you consequence

thank you thank you silence

 

how bout me not blaming you for everything

how bout me enjoying the moment for once

how bout how good it feels to finally forgive you

how bout grieving it all one at a time

 

thank you india

thank you terror

thank you disillusionment

thank you frailty

thank you consequence

thank you thank you silence

 

the moment I let go of it was the moment

I got more than I could handle

the moment I jumped off of it

was the moment I touched down

 

how bout no longer being masochistic

how bout remembering your divinity

how bout unabashedly bawling your eyes out

how bout not equating death with stopping

 

thank you india

thank you providence

thank you disillusionment

thank you nothingness

thank you clarity

thank you thank you silence

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on't want to be the filler if the void is solely yours

I don't want to be your glass of single malt whiskey

Hidden in the bottom drawer

I don't want to be a bandage if the wound is not mine

Lend me some fresh air

I don't want to be adored for what I merely represent to you

I don't want to be your babysitter

You're a very big boy now

I don't want to be your mother

I didn't carry you in my womb for nine months

Show me the back door

 

Visiting hours are 9 to 5 and if I show up at 10 past 6

Well I already know that you'd find some way to sneak me in and oh

Mind the empty bottle with the holes along the bottom

You see it's too much to ask for and I am not the doctor

 

I don't want to be the sweeper of the egg shells that you walk upon

And I don't want to be your other half, I believe that 1 and 1 make 2

I don't want to be your food or the light from the fridge on your face

At midnight, hey

What are you hungry for

I don't want to be the glue that holds your pieces together

I don't want to be your idol

See this pedestal is high and I'm afraid of heights

I don't want to be lived through

A vicarious occasion

Please open the window

 

Visiting hours are 9 to 5 and if I show up at 10 past 6

Well I already know that you'd find some way to sneak me in and oh

Mind the empty bottle with the holes along the bottom

You see it's too much to ask for and I am not the doctor

 

I don't want to live on someday when my motto is last week

I don't want to be responsible for your fractured heart

And it's wounded beat

I don't want to be a substitute for the smoke you've been inhaling

What do you thank me

What do you thank me for

 

Visiting hours are 9 to 5 and if I show up at 10 past 6

Well I already know that you'd find some way to sneak me in and oh

Mind the empty bottle with the holes along the bottom

You see it's too much to ask for and I am not the doctor

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I'm lookin' for someone who can made me feel

A serious love like Juliet's is real

A little impulsive and a boy at heart

A little bit shy but he'll be oh so smart

 

Superman I need a superman

 

You got a complicated girl like me

He's gotta be fair and treat me properly yeah

I want him to understand equality

You gotta Keep searchin' everywhere in the world

You gotta keep lookin' or you'll miss the feelin'

 

[CHORUS:]

You gotta be tough to make it today who

You do it your way and not how they say

You'll find him somewhere

You gotta be tough to make it today who

And never be scared of finding your way

to Superman

 

Should I call him on the telephone

Should I go seem him or just stay at home

will be different from the other boys

if I could find him I'd be overjoyed

 

Superman where are you Superman

Whenever it seems like everything's on the line

You gotta keep lookin' or you'll miss the feelin'

 

[CHORUS]

 

With all the other boys I never knew

what it took to make a choice

When he's mine I'm gonna stop

all my changin' around now

Between the two of us there'll be

enough goin' on that's serious

I can't wait 'til I can stop

all my lookin' around now

 

I found my Superman I found my Superman

 

Whenever it seems like everything's

on the line you gotta keep lookin' or

you'll miss the feelin'

 

[CHORUS]

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You're love ain't enough-OW!

You're just a party party party boy yeah

oh baby

You're just a party party party boy!

 

From the moment I walked into your life

I knew right then it was a serious

thing 4U

 

I got a kick out of your party friends

After a while I found a holiday, overdue

Who completely away from you

Oh baby your love ain't enough-OW!

 

[CHORUS:]

Party Boy You're just a party boy

Ain't no time for sleepin' cause you're misbehavin'

Party Boy You're just a party boy

Wake up soon and open your eyes

the time has come to see the light

 

It took me long enough to realize

That all you give me is a really big broken heart

And I remember how it used to be

There was a time when we could never be

torn apart and now I wish that we could make a start

You know I gave you all my love-OW!

 

[CHORUS]

 

This world of yours turning upside down

Goin' up and down like a merry-go-round

A rumor goin' on right across the town

Why can't you see it?

 

I gave you love like you never knew

And you're givin' me nothing but an attitude

And now I'm gonna give a bit of solitude

I'll miss you baby oh...

Misbehavin'-now I'll mis ya

 

Ow! Your just a party party party boy

yeah oh baby

You're just a party party party boy!

I've got to say to you so you listen

Hey Boy A-Good Bye!

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My misery has enjoyed company

And although I have ached

I don't threaten anybody

Sometimes I feel more bigness than I've shared with you

Sometimes I wonder why I quell when I'm not required to

I've tried to be small I've tried to be stunted

I've tried roadblocks and all

My happy endings prevented

Sometimes I feel it's all just too big to be true

I sabotage myself for fear of what my bigness could do

Fear of bliss and fear of joyitude

Fear of bigness (and ensuing solitude?)

I could be golden

I could be glowing

I could be freedom

But that could be boring

Sometimes I feel this is too scary to be true

I sabotage myself for fear of losing you

 

Fear of bliss and fear of joyitude

Fear of bigness (and ensuing solitude?)

 

This talk of liberation makes me want to go lie down

Under the covers til the terror of the unknown is gone

I could be full

I could be thriving

I could be shining

Sounds isolating

Sometimes I feel this is too good to be true

I sabotage myself for fear of what my joy could do

 

Fear of bliss and fear of joyitude

Fear of bigness (and ensuing solitude?)

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