SMdoubleXL Posted November 11, 2009 Share Posted November 11, 2009 I got NIGGER tattooed on my arm last night.. got up .. and it quit working this morning Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fastZeetec302 Posted November 11, 2009 Share Posted November 11, 2009 a gook, a jew and a nigger walk into a bar, the bartender goes hey get the fuck outta here. booooooooooooooooooooooo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted November 11, 2009 Share Posted November 11, 2009 I cannot remember if I posted this before but here we go, A rabbi and a priest are walking down the street. A five year old boy is walking in the opposite direction. The priest says to the rabbi "I sure would like to fuck that boy" in response rubbing his hands together the rabbi says "out of what?" What do you call a n*gger standing in a tree full of monkeys? Branch Manager. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SMdoubleXL Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 98% of black men say they like sex in the shower... the other 2% havent been to prison Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fishsticks Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 holy shit i missed this thread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seven-30 Posted November 13, 2009 Share Posted November 13, 2009 Whats worse than nailing a baby to a wall.......ripping it off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doodle Posted November 13, 2009 Share Posted November 13, 2009 whats the best way to catch a baby? with a pitchfork how many babies does it take to paint a barn? depends how hard you throw Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SMdoubleXL Posted November 13, 2009 Share Posted November 13, 2009 dr asks woman. "do you know what your asshole is doing while you are having an orgasm?" she says, "probably out hunting with his friends" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
p-roc Posted November 13, 2009 Share Posted November 13, 2009 whats worse than having sex with a 2yr old? gettin the blood out of your clown suit!!! what happends if you put a 2yr old in the microwave? Dunno, i was too busy masterbaiting!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SMdoubleXL Posted November 13, 2009 Share Posted November 13, 2009 what do you call an ethiopian with a yeast infection? a quarter pounder with cheese Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mountain dew Posted November 15, 2009 Share Posted November 15, 2009 Why is there no mexican olympic team? All the spics who can run, jump or swim are in the U.S.! Did you hear about the mexican that went to college? No, me neither. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
remainunderated Posted November 15, 2009 Share Posted November 15, 2009 LOL! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drunkfux Posted November 15, 2009 Share Posted November 15, 2009 A farmer catches someone drinking from his stream so he shout's over " You don't want to be drinking from there its full of horse piss and cow shit", The man looks up and says "Sorry I'm from Pakistan, could you please speak a little slower so I can understand", the farmer replies "If....you....use....two....hands...my....friend.....you'll.....get....more....to....drink" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decyferon Posted November 15, 2009 Share Posted November 15, 2009 Just been chatting to my neighbour's teenage daughter and it turns out she's big into UFOs and aliens. Which is cool because tomorrow she's getting abducted. My girlfriend just broke up with me. She found my collection of child pornography on my laptop. I tried to explain to her that it wasn't mine. She didn't believe me and asked me if I thought she was born yesterday. "I fucking wish", probably wasn't the best response. My new girlfriend recently told me she has breast cancer, during sex I told her she had ‘a killer pair of tits’. I’m single again. I just had an argument with a girl I know. She was saying how it's unfair that if a guy fucks a different girl every week, he's a legend, but if a girl fucks just two guys in a year, she's a slut. So in response I told her that if a key opens lots of locks, then it's a master key. But if a lock is opened by lots of keys, then it's a shitty lock. That shut her up. I'm American, and I'm sick of people saying America is the "stupidest country in the world" Personally, I think Europe is the stupidest country in the world. I was raping a woman the other night and she cried, "Please, think of my children!" Kinky bitch. A girl in a bar said to me, "I wouldn't fuck you if you were the last person alive." Leaning over and whispering, I replied, "But who would be around to stop me?" Wiped the smug look off her face. Why don't black people go on cruises? They're not falling for that one again. Christianity: One woman's lie about having an affair that got seriously out of hand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drunkfux Posted November 15, 2009 Share Posted November 15, 2009 ^ good ones Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beanshore Posted November 15, 2009 Share Posted November 15, 2009 I'm American, and I'm sick of people saying America is the "stupidest country in the world" Personally, I think Europe is the stupidest country in the world. i was about to quote this and say 'I don't get this." then it hit me and I'm american god dammit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decyferon Posted November 15, 2009 Share Posted November 15, 2009 ^^ LMAO case closed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decyferon Posted November 15, 2009 Share Posted November 15, 2009 How do you know when it's time to wash dishes and clean the house? Look inside your pants; if you have a penis, it's not time Why do women take longer than men to reach orgasm? Who cares? Why are there so many homes for battered women? Because they just don't fucking listen!! A man is in a queue at Tesco and sees this busty blonde staring at him, he cant believe she is staring at him, then she starts waving. Excuse me do I know you? he asks. Yes I think you are the father of one of my kids she says. The man thinks back and remembers his one act of infidelity and says F***ing hell are you the bird I shagged on me stag do, whilst your mate whipped me and your other mate stuck a brush up my arse? No she replies Im your sons English teacher! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ink face Posted November 15, 2009 Share Posted November 15, 2009 that last one is a juice commercial. "OOPS!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decyferon Posted November 15, 2009 Share Posted November 15, 2009 After strangulation, which organ in the female body remains warm after death? My cock. When people ask me what I do, I tell them I test rape alarms. It sounds better than saying I'm a rapist. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mdot Posted November 16, 2009 Share Posted November 16, 2009 What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CALIgula Posted November 16, 2009 Share Posted November 16, 2009 Christianity: One woman's lie about having an affair that got seriously out of hand. :lol::lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mdot Posted November 16, 2009 Share Posted November 16, 2009 What's the difference between a dead baby and an onion? I don't cry when I cut up a dead baby... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
delv Posted November 16, 2009 Share Posted November 16, 2009 Not paticularly offensive, but I lol'd! Why is a women's waist called a waist? Cos you could have easily fit another set of tits on there! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BLAZIN989 Posted November 24, 2009 Share Posted November 24, 2009 TOP!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decyferon Posted November 26, 2009 Share Posted November 26, 2009 At my local community centre there is a picture of Santa, only he's black. Made me wonder why they decided to make him black. Then I realised...he only works one day a year and he breaks into peoples houses. All the hallmarks really. I had just left my house the other day when some Jew came up to me and asked if I would donate to a 'survivors of the holocaust' charity. I can't explain why but it was at that moment that a thought struck me: "Shit, I've left my oven on." My daughter said to me the other day that she wants to be like Lady Gaga when shes older. I hope she meant she wants to be a popstar, and not some cross-dressing bloke... A tramp stopped me in the street and said "Blow job for £5." I thought why not, as its for charity. I didn't enjoy it though, he hadn't even bothered to wash his cock. (n/h) I'm getting really good at fisting my wife. I just broke her jaw. Everybody STOP being so fucking racist! There's a Black man in my family tree! He's been hanging there for weeks I was in a local clothes shop the other day when I saw a black man wearing a polyester shirt. This startled me, as normally they pick cotton. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rolf Harris Posted November 27, 2009 Share Posted November 27, 2009 two pregnant women are sitting knitting, one says to the other; "i hope mine's a boy because i've used blue wool" the woman replies... "i hope mine's a spaztic coz i've fucked up the arms" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swordfish meatloaf Posted November 27, 2009 Share Posted November 27, 2009 I'm getting really good at fisting my wife. I just broke her jaw. :lol: :lol: :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decyferon Posted November 28, 2009 Share Posted November 28, 2009 Ever tried a Strawberry Cream Pie ? You cum in her cunt then you punch her till she bleeds. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
where Posted November 28, 2009 Share Posted November 28, 2009 I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal labotomy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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