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graffsurgeon

offensive jokes..

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Guest mafIAkilla

after world war II is over,adolf hitler goes to hell. when he get's down there,satan is running towards him with a smile on his face. he says "you did some evil shit up there,i have something that i think you might like." so hitler follows satan into this huge room that looks almost like the inside of a volcano and sees a huge lake of fire with an enormous iron frying pan over it,and on the wall beside him he sees three levers. satan says "you ready? here goes..." and pulls the first lever. thousands of jews fall into this frying pan and burn to death. hitler gets a big smile on his face. satan pulls the second lever and the pan turns upside down and dumps all of the remnants of dead jews into the fire. hitler starts jumping up and down,begging to try it out and asks for a shot. satan says "hold on" and pulls the third lever. thousands of mexicans fall into the large pan and hitler looks and says "that's nice,but what are the mexicans for?".satan looks and says "gotta grease the pan."

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what do you call fifty black guys in a barn???

antique farming equipment.

 

 

what do you call two mexicans playing basketball against each other???

juan on juan.

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Originally posted by freeze

what do you call two mexicans playing basketball against each other???

juan on juan.

 

two gay mexicans

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Guest Canadiano
Originally posted by serpent of the light

how are a homosexual and a tumbleweed alike?

 

they just blow around until they end up stuck on a fencepost in wyoming.

 

 

that's a wicked joke, man...what the fuck are people talking about? it's funking funny as hell.

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Guest Canadiano

Re: told by my homie

 

Originally posted by willy.wonka

why is it that when white people take pictures...thier eyes are red?

 

cause they're the devil...OOOOOOOOOooooooh!

 

now that's what I'M talking aboot!

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Guest beard

this one had me rolling!

 

LSU Medical School students were receiving their first anatomy class

with a real dead human body. They were all gathered around the surgery

table with the body covered with a white sheet. The professor started the class

by telling them "In medicine, it is necessary to have two important

qualities as a doctor - the first is that it is necessary that you not be

disgusted."

 

The professor uncovered the body, stuck his finger in the butt of

the dead body, withdrew it and sucked his finger.

 

"Go ahead and do the same thing." He told his students.

 

The students freaked out, hesitated and subsequently taking turns sucking their finger after withdrawing it from the rectum.

 

When everybody was finished, the professor looked at them and told

them "The second important quality is observation. I stuck my middle

finger in and sucked my index finger. Pay attention people!!!!!"

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You know what I hate about kids?

 

They cry when you fuck 'em.

 

 

 

 

Hey, let's say you were hanging out with a friend of yours at the lake, drinking and fishing all night, and you passed out to wake up the next day with your pants around your ankels, and a sore ass hole.....would you tell anyone?

 

(Assuming the reply is no)

 

Wanna go to the lake this weekend?

 

 

 

 

You know the only part I hate about eating a nice smooth pussy?

 

Putting those damn diapers back on!

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whats the best thing about fucking a eleven year old girl in the shower?

when you flip em over they look like a boy...

 

 

 

 

man i feel dirty just typing that....

forgive father for i have sinned...........and i felt even dirtier typing that.....get it?

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okay so a girl asks her dad if she can borrow the car for the night

her dad says 'yea hunny but you know what you have to do'

'whats that?' the girl says

the dad replies 'you have to suck my dick'

'but dad!' the girl pleads

'well you know the rules' the father replies

'okay okay' the girl says

so the father drops his pants and the girl takes his dick into her mouth

instantly she pulls it out

she screams 'dad your dick tastes like shit!'

'oh im sorry' the father says

'i let your brother take the car'

:lol:

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how many cops does it take to push a black guy down a flight of stairs?

 

- none, ' he fell '

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male jokes

 

why dont women where watches???

because theres a clock on the stove.

 

 

what do 50,000 battered women have in common?

they dont fucking listen!

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Guest amorphic

I don't have any women bashing jokes, but I sure do have a few about Jews!

 

What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza?

Pizza's don't scream when you put them in the oven.

 

What do you tell a black Jew?

Get to the back of the oven!

 

 

being that i am a jew i have full written permission to tell these jokes without shame whoop whoop...........:D

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what do you say to a woman with 2 black eyes???

nothing, shes already been told twice.

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Originally posted by kodak

what do you say to a woman with 2 black eyes???

nothing, shes already been told twice.

 

:lol:

 

hillarious

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even tho im a girl all those kinda jokes are fuckin hilarious.

esp. the 2 black eyes one...

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hmmmm.

 

I usually have quite a few. But I'm tired and can't think.

I do ask how did Micheal Jackson go from a black kid to a middle-aged white woman?

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Q: what do you do when the dishwasher breaks down?

A: slap her

 

Q: how do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower?

A: give her a shovel

 

Q: whats wrong with women complaining about a mess in the living room?

A: her leash shouldn't let her out of the kitchen

 

Q: whats the first thing a wife does when she gets out of the battered wives clinic?

A: the dishes if she knows whats fucking good for her

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