Colt Posted February 13, 2002 Share Posted February 13, 2002 How do you drown a nigger? Burst his lips Why did God give Niggers a big penis? He had to make it up to them somehow for putting pubic hair on their heads! Why do niggers wear high heels? So their knuckles don't scrape the ground What is long black and stinky? The unemployment line Why do blacks wear turtlenecks? So they can hide the flea collars What do you call 4 black people in a Cadillac? Grand theft auto. When do blacks become niggers? When they leave the room. What do you call a Black priest? Holy Shit. What do you call a black hitchhiker? Very Unlucky. If there is 3 black people in a car who's driving? The police. If 10,000 black people go to mars whats it called-problem- If 100,000 black people go to mars whats it called-problem- If all the black people go to mars whats it called-Problem solved. what do you call a white girl, a dick sucker what do you call a white boy, another dick sucker what do you call the dumb asses who call blacks niggers? niggers COLT (this topic rocks...can we get some asian jokes....and some more women jokes!....it's not nearly offencive enough in here) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colt Posted February 13, 2002 Share Posted February 13, 2002 Three men are applying for a job at the FBI. The job is very sensitive, and very stressful and the FBI wants to run a test to see how the men will respond to orders, and respond to pressure. The first man comes in and the FBI instrucxtor gives him a gun, and tells him to go into a private room and kill his wife. He runs out crying, and doesn't get the job. The second man is handed the gun, and told to do the same thing. He walks into the room, and "BAM" fires the gun, and walks out of the room, "i couldn't do it" he said "i just fired at the ceiling." He too is denied the job. The third man comes in, and is given the gun, and told to go in and kill his wife. He takes the gun, walks in, and fires...BAM...BAM...BAM....and there is silence....then the FBI directors outside hear alot of noise comming from the room, and they hear a woman's scream. The man walks out of the room, covered in blood. The FBI directors ask him "what happened" and the man responds, "the gun you gave me was loaded with blanks, so i had to beat the bitch to death with a chair" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eyeBddub Posted February 13, 2002 Share Posted February 13, 2002 : Q: what do you say to a woman with no arms or legs? A: nice tits Q: what do 54,000 abused woman have in common? A: none of them fucking listen Q: whats black and blue and hates sex? A: a rape victim Q: what do you do after raping a deaf mute girl? A: break her fingers so she can't tell anybody Q: whats the difference between St. Patrick's Day and Martin Luther King day? A: on St. Patrick's Day, everybody wants to be Irish Q: why don't puerto ricans (haha mammero :) have check books? A: because its impossible to write your name that small in spray paint Q: what do you call a puerto rican midget? A: a spec Q: why is there so little puerto rican literature? A: spray paint wasn't invented until 1949 Q: why do women get a period? A: because they DESERVE it Q: what do fat people do in the summer time? A: stink WHAT! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iris Posted February 13, 2002 Share Posted February 13, 2002 Originally posted by tue skinny haha . nice. got any other dead baby ones. id like to hear em. whats the difference between a dead baby and an onion? no one cries when you slice the baby. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iris Posted February 13, 2002 Share Posted February 13, 2002 dad told me this: why were there only 15,000 mexicans at the alamo? they only had one car Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colt Posted February 13, 2002 Share Posted February 13, 2002 Why did barbie and ken never have any kids? Because Ken came in a different box Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
graffsurgeon Posted February 14, 2002 Author Share Posted February 14, 2002 come on now.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mosluggo Posted February 14, 2002 Share Posted February 14, 2002 Why are Italians called dago's? Because nigger was already taken Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EL MASKO Posted February 14, 2002 Share Posted February 14, 2002 BAHAHAHAHAHAHA. These are all great. Q: Why don't women carry umbrellas? A: Because it doesn't rain between the bedroom & the kitchen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SenorSeven Posted February 14, 2002 Share Posted February 14, 2002 i didnt read them all but..heres some i can think off Q: whats the most popular pick up line at a gay bar? A: can i push in your stool? Q: whats the first thing a woman does when she gets home from the battered womens clinic? A: the dishes if the bitch knows whats good for her Q: how do you keep 5 black guys from raping a white woman? A: give them a basketball Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Dazzle Posted February 14, 2002 Share Posted February 14, 2002 There was this little boy about 12 years old walking down the sidewalk dragging a flattened frog on a string behind him. He came up to the doorstep of a house of ill repute and knocked on the door. When the Madam answered it, she saw the little boy and asked what he wanted. He said, "I want to have sex with one of the women inside. I have the money to buy it, and I'm not leaving until I get it." The Madam figured, why not, so she told him to come in. Once in, she told him to pick any of the girls he liked. He asked, "Do any of the girls have any diseases?" - Of course the Madam said no. He said, "I heard all the men talking about having to get shots after making love with Amber. THAT'S the girl I want." Since the little boy was so adamant and had the money to pay for it, the Madam told him to go to the first room on the right. He headed down the hall dragging the squashed frog behind him. Ten minutes later he came back, still dragging the frog, paid the Madam, and headed out the door. The Madam stopped him and asked, "Why did you pick the only girl in the place with a disease, instead of one of the others?" He said, "Well, if you must know, tonight when I get home, my parents are going out to a restaurant to eat, leaving me at home with a baby-sitter. After they leave, my baby-sitter will have sex with me because she just happens to be very fond of cute little boys. She will then get the disease that I just caught. When Mum and Dad get back, Dad will take the baby-sitter home. On the way, he'll fuck the baby-sitter, and he'll catch the disease. Then when Dad gets home from the baby-sitter's, he and Mum will go to bed and have sex, and Mum will catch it. In the morning when Dad goes to work, the Milkman Will deliver the milk, have a quickie with Mum and catch the disease, and HE'S the fucking bastard who ran over my FROG." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SenorSeven Posted February 14, 2002 Share Posted February 14, 2002 ok- bear with me..this is a long one..but yes it has an ending and yes its funny picture a brook in the middle of the woods in a remote area- over the brook/stream, there is a fly hoovering in the brook, there is a fish that is thinking when that fly comes down, im going to eat it, at the edge of the brook is a bear. The bear is thinking when the fly comes down, the fish will jump up and get the fly and he will grab the fish. Behind the bear is a tree. Behind this tree is a hunter with a cheese sandwich in his pocket. The hunter is thinking when the fly comes down, the fish will jump up and get teh fly, the bear will leap for the fish and he will shoot the bear. Behind the hunter is a mouse. The mouse is thinking when the fly comes down, the fish will leap up and eat the fly, the bear will go for the fish, the hunter will try to shoot the bear, the cheese sandwich will fall out of his pocket and the mouse iwll get the cheese sandwich....Behind the mouse is a cat. The cat is thinking, when the fly comes down, the fish will get the fly, the bear will get the fish, the hunter will shoot the bear, the cheese sandwich will fall out the pocket and the mouse will get it and the cat can eat the mouse- ok...the fly comes down the fish gets the fly the bear leaps forward and gets the fish the hunter shoots the bear the cheese sandwich falls out the pocket the mouse gets the sandwich, the cat over jumps and lands in teh brook- whats the moral of this story? when the fly comes down the pussy always gets wet. woohoo..much funnier in person im sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kookone Posted February 14, 2002 Share Posted February 14, 2002 Hey Beardo! This is a perfect thread for your unique style of jokes. What's going on here? This one is kinda stupid, but I thought I would post it anyway... What do two quarters in a public toilet and a brunette have in common? Everybody sees them but no one will take them out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aerosolfunk Posted February 14, 2002 Share Posted February 14, 2002 why shouldn't you hit a mexican on a bike? because it might be your bike. why shouldn't you hit a negro on a bike? because it might be your negro. damn, just in time for black history month too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest mind fuck Posted February 14, 2002 Share Posted February 14, 2002 Q: What did the blind boy get for christmas? A: Cancer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smart Posted February 15, 2002 Share Posted February 15, 2002 Re: does anyone know...? Originally posted by eon135 anyone know any more "definiton" jokes? What's the definition of a TRUE friend? A guy who'll walk to town, get two blowjobs, and come back and give you one... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eyeBddub Posted February 15, 2002 Share Posted February 15, 2002 whats the definition of making love? something a women does while a guy is fucking her Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest beardo Posted February 18, 2002 Share Posted February 18, 2002 bump for one of the best threads ever Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jah Posted February 18, 2002 Share Posted February 18, 2002 a third of those posts arent funny at all. theyre just straight fuckin gross, not to mention disturbing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drinktheblood Posted February 21, 2002 Share Posted February 21, 2002 Originally posted by jah a third of those posts arent funny at all. theyre just straight fuckin gross, not to mention disturbing. but the other two thirds are funny as shit. a little racist, but really funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
REGULATOR Posted February 22, 2002 Share Posted February 22, 2002 these two cops are bored as fuck so the first cop says the the second.."hey wanna go shoot some cans??" the second cops is overjoyed and exclaims "yea sure!!! what kinda cans?" the first cop replies "just mexicans and africans" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Motha Fuka Posted February 22, 2002 Share Posted February 22, 2002 whats the difference between a jew and a pie pies dont screem when u put them in the oven why did hitler kill himself he finally got his gas bill what do u do to a two legged dog take it for a drag what is black and has 39 tits in it a disposal bag outside a lipo sucktion clinick how can u kill 100 flies at once hit an etheopian in the head with a pot what do u call an etheopian on a hunger an etheopean whats the difference between a nigger and an onion the obvious one would be an onion's white but thats no it no one cries when u chop a nigger what do u call 3 niggers and 3 chinks on a lawn nigger nigger nigger, (make a chopping empression with ur hand) chink chink chink who killed kennedy a jew who killed jesus a jew ill post more later Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
REGULATOR Posted February 22, 2002 Share Posted February 22, 2002 there was once a homosexual priest that enjoyed ass fuckin people. well he died, and was sent to heaven, and while waiting at the pearly gates with Peter, peter drops his keys and bends down the pick them up. the priest, unable to control his urges, ass fucks peter. peter is startled and yells at the priest..."look, you do that again and im sending you to hell"....this time peter drops his pen, and the priest once again cannot resist his sexual urges and ass fucks peter again, sending him to hell........about 4 months later, peter visits hell (dont as me why). while peter is down there it has turned into a cold place, and all the devils are sitting down freezing. puzzled peter goes to satan and asks him why it is suddenly so cold...satan replies to peter."you try picking up a damn peice of firewood down here" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colt Posted February 22, 2002 Share Posted February 22, 2002 Originally posted by jah a third of those posts arent funny at all. theyre just straight fuckin gross, not to mention disturbing. What are you talking about! this is the greatest thread ever....we finally get a chance to voice our oppinions...and hate! =) hehehehe...Kidding...major bump for this thread...I printed this shit out and passed it around to everyone I knew....they haven't stopped laughing yet! COLT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Motha Fuka Posted February 22, 2002 Share Posted February 22, 2002 whats the difference between a nigger and a pizza a pizza can feed a family of four how can u tell if u see a rich nigger u wont how many niggers does it take to eat a burrito supreme with rice 2 how will the raised welfare rates help niggers and their famalies it wont Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
graffsurgeon Posted February 22, 2002 Author Share Posted February 22, 2002 Originally posted by Colt What are you talking about! this is the greatest thread ever....we finally get a chance to voice our oppinions...and hate! =) hehehehe...Kidding...major bump for this thread...I printed this shit out and passed it around to everyone I knew....they haven't stopped laughing yet! COLT yeah, i really enjoy this thread myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Motha Fuka Posted February 23, 2002 Share Posted February 23, 2002 what was helen keller's dog's name muwhatheahghataleaha why do women get married to get divorced whats flat and gets layed by mexicans all the time no not bricks ur mom asshole Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smart Posted February 23, 2002 Share Posted February 23, 2002 The Rek, besides your repeat of a joke that has already been told... you can't tell a joke worth fuckk... fer instance... what do you call 3 chinamen, a mexican and 2 black guys on your lawn? A SPRINKLER!!! (chink chink chink, spic, nigga niga) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dukeofyork Posted February 23, 2002 Share Posted February 23, 2002 what does a blonde say after sex? NEXT! whats a blondes mating call? IM SO DRUNK.. what do blondes and turtles have in common? when theyre on theyre backs, theyre both screwed. what do a blonde and a desk lamp have in common? when screwed on desk, both become permanent fixtures. what did the blonde say when the doctor told her she was pregnant? is it mine? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ThePrankster Posted February 24, 2002 Share Posted February 24, 2002 Originally posted by KASTsystem What the definition of gross ? Dreaming you're eating chocolate pudding and waking up with a spoon up your ass. What's grosser than gross? Fucking a pregnant lady and the fetus gives you head. :D funny but so So SO disturbing... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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