Stories from when you were in high school.

[One Man Banned]

Heavy metal daze, we called ourselves Damage Inc, angry kids senselessly destroying everything, fires, theft, vandalism, explosions, etc., etc.  When we reminisce now we're like yo, there was no rhyme or reason for much of that and we're lucky we were never caught.

[One Man Banned]

Maybe a bit anticlimatic.  Only story I got for now starts as high school ends and spills over into the months after.  Some of it is blurry so I'll do the best I can.  I had a friend who was becoming a douche and it ended with me throwing him out of my house one day and telling him to get fucked.  Dude later wanted to be back in my good graces and approached me with humility on it, so I let him back.  I didn't have a car in h.s. but for the people who did, one stoned/drunken amusement was to take the car off roading in a random person's front yard, a lawn job.  As h.s. was coming to a close I was going to go on to classes at a local college.  I guess some people took it as I would be moving on and leaving people behind.  This kid decided to show me I was no longer "in" by taking his new car across my folks lawn one night, an unprovoked attack that I found out was him.  So I went to the store one night and got a dozen eggs, went to dude's house and threw the whole carton at once on his new car, some piece of shit 2 door that was sporty but not cool.  I went back probably two other times and did the same.  As I was leaving one time I swear I saw someone in the front door, either the kid or his mom.  Time passes and maybe I forget about it.  I'm in the supermarket one night and I hear someone run up on me and they knock me.  I turn around, it's the kid's best buddy, he works at the supermarket (think the other kid did too), he's enraged about what's happening and wants to fight right then and there.  I don't remember even being mad, maybe because my beef wasn't with this guy, but I also remember thinking a brawl in the market was likely leading to me getting arrested.  However it happened, we agreed to meet later that night after they got off work.  In the meantime the place I was going to school at was having a free pizza night.  My homie met up with me to get in on it since no one would notice and we said fuck meeting those guys and crushed much pizza instead.  Later that night we pull up to a light in town and who's there in the car next to us but the two guys.  Words and gestures exchanged at the light, as much as I remember the light turned green and they turned where we went straight.  I knew where these guys were going and directed my buddy that way, catching up with them head on.  Should mention now that my buddy had no stake in this, he just enjoyed everything that was about to happen.  Should also mention that the kid in the other car and his buddy took turns driving the kid's car during this.  My friend pulls up behind them and they get out to fight.  I think the kid jumped up on the car because I remember telling my buddy to throw it in reverse and see if we could dump the kid off in the snow.  My dude was a hockey goalie and he had two goalie sticks in the car.  We grabbed them and were going to get out when one of these guys backs their car up like we can't leave.  There was snow on the ground and my buddy couldn't get his car to back up.  He didn't like this for some reason so he starts butting the guy's car in front of us, definitely crunching on this kid's new bumper.  Kid is yelling to move the car forward to make room seeing his bumper getting crunched.  They move and my friend turns his car and takes off across the intersection while this kid drives his own car around in front of us.  He gets out and runs for our car while my friend accelerates at him.  Kid jumps onto the hood and onto the roof, he's pounding on the roof and windshield demanding I get out.  Instead my sense of mischief kicks in right then.  I look at my friend and tell him "drive."  It's a cold night, snow on the ground, and this kid is on the roof in a button down shirt and tie from work, it had to be fucking cold with bare hands gripping that roof but we pull out onto a main road and start driving with this kid trying to hang on.  As we pick up speed I tell homie to hit the wipers so now we're spraying dude with blue windshield washer fluid, had to be extra cold.  We drove about 3 miles like this before we came to a stop sign.  This kid's friend was following us in the kid's car and as we came to the stop sign he pulled ahead of us and blocked us.  Kid on the roof was kind of done as I recall, just wanted back in his car at this point.  But his buddy came up to my window with one of those Spiderco knives and was like you're going to get out and fight.  He then ran the knife down the hood of my friend's car, which was one of those shitty Chevettes.  My boy didn't like this so he punches the gas  and drives straight into dude's car in front of us, knocking the car forward several feet, cracking the grill on the Chevette in half and damaging the radiator too.  After that dudes got in their car and disappeared, never saw them again.  Anyhow the whole dude on the roof while driving shit was like something out of a movie, amazing no cops were called and no one got arrested.

Edited September 14, 2019 by One Man Banned

[T4M*]

On 9/12/2019 at 11:49 PM, Hua Guofang said:

I keep on reading this as “stories from when you were high in school”.

 

Mbruhh, me too!

 

[mn1_fuckos]

I went to school with a bunch of hood muthafuckers 

 

while sitting in the cafeteria I watched a guy walk over to a friend of his and ask him for a bite of sandwich. His friend told him no which resulted in him getting his ass beat OVER A SANDWICH. 

 

 

Another time some kid unknowingly stepped on an ketchup packet which ended up getting ketchup on some asshole's dirty shoes.  Dude looks down at his dirty white airforce ones and you knew he was gonna beat that kids ass. Kid goes to sit down to eat his food not knowing he's about to get his ass beat when dude walks up to him throws the lunch tray he had in his hand at the kids face and proceeds to hammer fist his head.

 

Another time in shop some guy starts roasting this girl for no reason mind you this asshole looked like the lovechild of elmo and a california raisin. she finally got fed up and told him she wasnt having it then he started making fun of her baby. She told him to keep her baby's name out of his mouth he proceeded to tell her "fuck you and your bitch ass baby" took about to second before she beat his ass and through a chair at him. He wasnt a person that was particularly liked so someone else got up and took a desk and dropped it on him. The instructor watched the whole thing go down but to be honest not much you can do sometimes. 

[earmuffs]

On a road trip with a couple friends heading back home, we decided to get rid of a box of donut holes we had.   

 

Driving along a two lane road we see a cavalier with a smashed in front end.  My boy throws a donut and nails the car.  The driver slams on the breaks and makes a u-turn and starts chasing after us.  

 

I figure fuck it and floor it.  He chased after us for a good 10 miles doing about 100.  We came around a corner to our surprise there was a road  block.  I slam on the breaks and turn into an empty gravel lot.  

 

I was pulled outta the drivers window at gun point and cuffed.  He started yelling at me about not pulling over for the cavalier.  Turns out it was an undercover cop.   Now I should mention that a couple miles before the road block we did hear some faint sirens, but thought it was the music (rap) we  were listening to. 

 

I told the cop we thought it was our friend Cody  that had the same type of car.  He went and questioned the other two about it.  Turns out they had also given the same story about our friend Cody having a similar car. 

 

They ended up giving my friend a ticket for littering and let us on our way.  

[DETO]

Some friends and I were driving in a rental car my mom had and it had the lever in the trunk to let you out in case you somehow ended up stuck in the trunk, anyway, one day a few friends and I were driving around our towns plaza (small tourist art town) and one of us would jump out of the trunk when we were at a stop and the passenger would get out and chase them... We did this a few times to the horror of the tourist. 

 

My buddy Adam got his brothers social security card and he and I went to the DMV and he used his brothers expired ID and SS card to get an ID saying he was 21, that's how we got our booze. 

 

We Were out of town in 2 vehicles and at red lights someone from the second vehicle would run up on the first vehicle start a fake fight and get dragged into the other car. 

[earmuffs]

Some friends of mine had a gorilla costume and would go out in the woods at night and run across the road when a car was coming. They did this a few times until word got out about Sasquatch sightings and people started hunting it.   It even made a hunting magazine if i recall.  

[Ko SprueOne]

^ Hellz Yeah, very clever!

[Ko SprueOne]

Some weekend nights we'd lay irrigation pipe across a back road that was between fields. They were aluminum and approx 6" diameter X 10' long +/-. Semi trucks and cars would just roll over them and flatten the pipes out making a loud clang-clang sound. The only excitement was that we'd see the headlights far down the road and watch them get closer and closer. Then they didn't see it until they were already rolling over them so some would slam on the brakes and skid. 

 

Then we saw headlights toward our direction from down that road. It got closer and we realized it was a fckin motorcycle. Oh sht, "drag it back off the road!" but too late it was almost on it. Just like the others, driver didn't see it until on it. Plowed straight through it though. We all ducked out and and peekin out from where ever we were hiding.

 

Driver stopped and just sat there for a bit probably trippin on the successful defeat over wipin out. Makes a u-turn, goes back and drags the pipe back off the road all responsibly. Cussing and sht

 

 

[Schnitzel]

Not that good but I was accused of stealing a teacher's car during a boring school day.

 

Apparently the teacher looked out staff room window to see his POS car slowly reversing out of it's parking spot and heading across the carpark to the gate.

 

Some fuckwit tells somebody it's me and it gets back to teachers

While this is going on said teacher borrows another teacher's car keys to give chase, roars out of the grounds and in process fucks the gearbox in the second teacher's car (excellent) hitting a curb or something.

 

Trouble is I was a chronic truant that year ( missed over 50% of the school year) so I wasn't able to be located at school.

But I had come in for roll call that morning so apparently I was at school. I used to come for roll call then leg it out the side gate.

In the meantime I'm sitting at a pool hall in Taylor square that was dope if a little hectic ( stolen goods under the end tables, "you young fellas don't talk to the guys in the back room don't even look at them, make sure you knock on toilet door before you go in") playing pool.

 

The guy liked us and was told that if ever a school called none of us were in there which  he was totally cool with.

 

So next day I go to school for an exam which I had actually studied on my own for and no sooner than the exam starts than Mr Barris ( stolen car teacher,) the principal  come in and escort me out of the exam to the Principal's office. There's a police mna there waiting for me.

I explain that It wasn't me - I couldn't drive etc. but they don't want to hear it.

Eventually he asks if you weren't at the school where exactly were you and in order to keep this from my mum I admitted I was at the pool hall.

 

Policeman rings pool hall, Pool hall guy denies we were ever in there and I end up in the shit before it becomes plainly obvious it wasn't me.

 

I can't recall how it finished but I think some saviour pointed out the real person.

 

 easiest test they could have done was put me in a car and make me drive it... would have told them all they needed to know.

 

 

[abrasivesaint]

My friends and I used to light fires in our friend yard every so often. Not in a fireplace but just like in his grass. One day we’re going about business as usual and the dumbass left a trail of gas from the spot to the can. So he lights the fire, people are kicking basketball through it and that kinda shit. Using PVC piping as a handheld blowgun type flamethrower... then the trail goes up, all the way to his shed, haha. The dude goes running to get the fire extinguisher and as hes about to let it rip it dawns on all of us that a few weeks prior he had emptied the tank in the yard just fucking around. So the fire extinguisher spits dust and we all start dying laughing.
 

I forget how he actually got the fire out, i assume water.  

[SMdoubleXL]

Senior year one of our teachers fell ill and we, as a class, ran through thirteen subs in a matter of two months. We would throw books Across the class And shit. We decided one day we wanted everyone to have a break so we doused a piece of paper with hairspray and as we walked out of the class we lit it on fire and dropped it in the metal trash bin.  (I didn’t know I was pregnant at the time either) 
I had already had my license revoked until I was 19 for a gta at 15 and on probation for boostin other shit. We would typically acquire a vehicle -father a few kids (and always the big brotha homie to block the door) we would go in a clothing store and rack. Like run out racks. 10-15 pairs of jeans and tees, swimsuits, shoes (if we could) jackets....just get as much as you can and dip. Big homie always prevented someone from chasing us out.  
 

 

[BOXCUTTERJACK]

My freshman year we had this kid get butt ass naked and streak during the fall pep rally. Homie timed the shit perfectly, right in the middle of the national anthem.