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taper

taking shits in public restrooms

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do...but I coat the seat in TP...you don't know who's ass critters might be hanging out

 

don't hover

just rest your feet

because the crabs in here

jump 10 feet

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do. with all the paint i've inhaled over the years i only take a shit about once a week, so when it's coming, i don't make it wait

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i just kind of hover too. but you gotta wach them heavy ones so the water dont get on your ass and shit. droppin bombs like afganistan.

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Originally posted by taper

...you gotta wach them heavy ones so the water dont get on your ass....

 

 

throw a couple pieces of toilet paper into the water before you sit down, this will stop the dreaded 'splash-back'

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yea. plus i always flush first. i flush the shitter with my foot too. fuck that shit.;) ive prefected the art of public restrooom shitting. normal shit at my house io can shit it at a bathroom in 5 secons or less as opposed to 30 mins.

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Guest Pilau Hands

do...smoke at the same time. amazing tension reliever. you shit, spit, ash, and piss...and when done, flush that shit away forever. it's like going to a hypnotist. follow the tp lay down technique. thou shalt not splash.

 

"Doc it hurts real bad. When I move my ass it feels like I'm on fire."

"Oh, alright well let me just take a littl...OH MY SWEET JESUS!"

"WHAT WHAT?!"

"You didn't...by any chance, get some Thailand airport water spalshed into your ass did you?"

"Oh my god yes I did. What's wrong?"

"Well I don't know how to tell you this...but there's a gigantic worm living in your anus..."

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Guest willy.wonka

honestly

 

i will wipe the seat off then spread my cheeks over the bowl and sit like a mad man..

on ocassion i will wipe my arse and throw the tiolet paper in another tiolet...so people think that i didnt wipe my ass....i do this in peoples houses....i get a kick out of it..;)

 

i still want to go in to a public restroom and shit along the seat...

 

my homeboy stuckone did a shit tag all over TACO BELLS wall...

 

 

 

shit is such a funny thing

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Guest printer

i took a bigg ass shit today in school, i put mad toilet paper down on the sit tho . .. shits gross people pissin all over the sit and what not. yah first time i ever toook a shit in this school year/

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if extra rolls of paper are around you can put 4 of them around the seat to make a pedestal to sit on

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At my school I try to go for the restrooms that are out of the way where I can chill by myself and relax. I don't want to hear anyone next to me grunting or farting. If anyone is gonna be grunting or farting it's gonna be me. We got those electronic sensor one's at my school. I guess that almost makes up for paying a hundred dollars a book and finding NO parking. You know whats messed up. When they first set them up the sensors were too sensitive so after you put that paper bowl guard down and turn around to sit down the shit would flush down the bowl and you'd have to get another one. Or else when you get up the toilet would flush like 15 million times. Kinda embarrassing. I hate when you go in there and the seats down and there piss all over it. And if that wasn't bad enough there a couple of pieces of "taco meat" on the seat or in the bowl.

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Guest willy.wonka

you guys dont know!!!

 

in high school....go to the nurses bathroom.

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Re: you guys dont know!!!

 

Originally posted by willy.wonka

in high school....go to the nurses bathroom.

Hell yeah! I always used to do that. Ugh. I don't feels so good I need a pass to the nurse's office. Ah I nice 1 stall little spot to meditate with my little homies.

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Re: Re: you guys dont know!!!

 

Originally posted by Pistol

Hell yeah! I always used to do that. Ugh. I don't feels so good I need a pass to the nurse's office. Ah I nice 1 stall little spot to meditate with my little homies.

 

meditate with your homies huh?

sounds like someone wasnt just takin a shit...

 

 

 

when it comes to shitting anywhere other than my place, you gotta do what you gotta do, take appropriate precautionary measures.

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See, what none of you fools know about is the fine art of shitting OUTSIDE the toilet bowl.

 

Great places to shit in a lockable public bathroom:

 

-The sink

 

-The floor in front of the toilet

 

-The trash can

 

-The door handle

 

Take my word for it -- there's no splash worries and the reaction you'll here/see minutes later as you finish your regular business at whatever public establishment you're at is priceless.

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one time in eighth grade i had the most horrible runs at school. i was so hell bent on not taking a shit in our nasty ass bathroom that i convinced myself i could hold it to the end of the day. so it turns out i have this science test to take and i cant concentrate because of this horrible stabbing pain in my bowels. it got so bad that i started to shake and cold sweat. finally i gave in and asked the teacher if i could go to the bathroom. she said yes, but i would have to use the one right next to the classroom, where everyone could hear me shit-farting and could see that i obviously wasnt taking a leek by the amount of time i would spend in there. so i said forget it and sat back down, by then my asshole couldnt take the pressure anymore and was squeezing off little shit pellets into my boxers. when that bell rang i ran so goddam fast to that crapper. it was one of the most relieving shits i have ever taken.

ever since then i swallow my pride and shit in public restrooms, ill even shit in the bushes if need be.

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haha i live exactly 1 minute away from school. so FUCK that shit.

 

if needed, i will shit in the bathrooms at the nice grocery store. theyre nicer than home.

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seriously only taken a shit in public facilities once or twice. i like tha comfort of home. i can barely take a shit at my friend's house or a relative's house not that theyre nasty but i just have this thing.

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